I’m afraid of being manipulated, help me? - Help.com

I think you should judge based on your own experience of the person. It looks like you both have similar fears, which is not so bad. But you need to spend more time getting to know her before you can really judge. You both seem a little confused, but it will be lots better if you just get to know each other and not try so hard to figure out everything in advance. Who knows? If nothing else you might get a lifelong friendship out of the deal.

You really suspect something is going on with this girl that isn’t on the up and up.

Come on, let’s be real and honest otherwise you wouldn’t be so concerned. I don’t believe things were just deadly dull one day and you decided to read all of her old blog’s, it isn’t done that way.

She sounds terribly immature and really not ready for a commitment. The term Man-eater is just another clique’ for heart-breaker. So be careful with your heart. If you have feelings that make you doubtful of her then trust those feelings. Don’t get serious right away just hang out.

My friends have given me completely stupid nicknames before to tease me, and I would hate to think that someone gave up on me just because they came across one of them. “Maneater” is probably a huge exaggeration. If her friends really thought that, they would probably deal with it privately, so it wouldn’t come across as a criticism or as total bragging. They’re just teasing her, in my opinion. Don’t take it too seriously

And be brave!

I don’t think she’s ready for a commitment yet, either, but that’s for her to decide. She is probably ready to hang out and get to know somebody. So just relax!

OP here, thanks for helping me guys. Actually, I’m really glad that you guys are telling me to just trust what I know of her in real life. I think I’ll be a lot less anxious now.

Anon, try not to get too emotionally attached unless she gets attached too. Im thinking shes kinda young, but I believe she said “she doesnt think true love exists” for the simple stupid reason of her judging mankind (relationshipwise) based on the stupidity of one dude (her ex!) who broke her heart. In other words, she gave too much to someone who simply was too immature to appreciate correctly. Thats a possibility.
She’ll keep believeing that until the day she meets someone who she will really fall in love with.

My advice…Just take it easy, vent, relax, act accordingly, and base your opinions on her actions (more than on her her words) and remember not to be needy nor act clingy.
=)

Take care!

I’ve broken things off with guys because they seemed so independent I felt totally unneeded. In retrospect they were probably just trying hard not to seem clingy, and I was getting the wrong impression. Lesson learned. Some things are true whether or not people show them, and everybody needs other people. I think being SUPER-needy is a big mistake, but the complete opposite (showing total independence) isn’t so great either. A healthy person will be balanced in this area. So just take care of your emotional health and don’t worry about it.

I bet she has had her hopes disappointed at some point and it hurts too much right now to believe in true love. You don’t have to feel sorry for her, everybody goes through this. She’ll be fine. Just help her relax and enjoy her time. You will be doing her a favor, as well as any guy who might come after you if things don’t pan out. It helps a girl immensely to simply be treated well, and it sets a good precedent for the rest of her life.

If you want her to relax, relax yourself! Some girls absorb the moods and attitudes of the people around them, at least for a period of their lives. If you’re relaxed, she will be, too.

Guys, I want you to know what happens when you treat a girl with dignity, no matter how she treats you:

1) She raises her standards for herself.
2) It helps heal the wounds of any previous indignities she might have suffered.
3) You set her up to be treated well in her next relationship. Lucky you if you date a girl who has been respected by a previous boyfriend. She will respect you more, challenge you more and be a lot more fun and a lot less confusing. And if you treat a girl with dignity, even if you break up with her it’s an act of respect for another guy, because you send off a girl whose heart is still in one piece rather than creating a mess that some other guy has to mop up. Her next boyfriend and eventually the man she marries, will both be grateful to you, and you will be grateful to any guy who treats the woman you are going to marry with respect, too!
4) She never forgets it, and she respects you forever for how you treated her.

I know we women can be awfully confusing, but keep in mind that investing in respecting a girl is investing in her self-respect as well as in any future relationship she might have. That’s a kindness to other guys as well as to girls. It’s a kindness to the future husband of any woman you date, whether or not that man turns out to be you. You need never regret treating a girl with respect even if she periodically acts like a dragon. We women need to remember that the converse is true, too.

Good luck!

(I know the previous advice was unasked for, it’s just something I’m passionate about!)

Thanks for all the advice, Byrdie. It is much appreciated. :D