The woman who brought me up died on Saturday. - Help.com

i’m sry to hear she passed away, since all in all she was your mother figure. if you won’t be at the funeral then perhaps you can go visit her afterwards and make your piece. atleast this way you can tell her everything you ever wanted to tell her and she’ll finally be there to listen. as long as you get closure in some form. you’ll figure things out eventually and things will get better; just give it time.

You could create a tribute to her in your garden or in a forest somewhere.
You need to let go of all the hurt, and remember the good. Once u say your goodbye, you can let yourself move forward.

use it as closure. its over now. she cant hurt you anymore. hes a douchebag, and you got a ring. youre no more alone than you were before, so dont let this get you down

hey.. i hope you’re feeling better by now.

i think i can relate a bit. i wasn’t brought up by my mum, but rather my aunt (my dad’s sister who never married). she was good to me and really, i will admit that a lot of who i am today is because of how she raised me. she left for a long time though, because my mum came back and can take care of me. then starting four months ago she returned and lived here in our house. suddenly she’s a different person. i don’t know… maybe it’s the age (she’s really old by now), her life experience, or maybe i remember her differently. i really don’t know. it’s hard to hate her because i’m overwhelmed with guilt. but at the same time i can’t go back to loving her in that level. ok, i guess my case is a bit different haha.

i guess my advice is, consider her death as THE closure. you can dislike her still, especially because all the hurt is still fresh and even her death is pretty recent. but at the same time, try to remember all the good times as a sign of respect. no matter how adults raise us and their intentions, something good comes out of it (together with the bad). if we’re treated badly, maybe we become stronger. or maybe we become more gentle with children. or maybe we become more emphatic.

there may be a lot of things going through your head right now. just take your time and process all of those until you’re ready to move on officially. best of luck!

did you tell anyone she was dead? coz people arent mindreaders…..

She turned a blind eye to your abuse.
People only sometimes believe what they wish to, even if the evidence is right in front of them.
She didnt help to stop it happening or protect u. But I bet despite her weakness she loved u.
It is time to finally stand up to the person she couldnt. If u feel it is right to go to the funeral do! With a person for moral support. If she wished u to have the ring u will have it.
Give yourself time to morn. Then as u said close the chapter on your past.

O_o wat?
i wasnt trying to insult you. you said you didnt see or hear from anyone, i was simply asking if they even KNEW. jeez, calm down.