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Ok my problem is I can’t fit in anywhere.

I’m literally socially backwards. When I first meet someone I can do a general “what music do you like” etc conversation but after that theres nothing. The relationship never progresses past acquaintance. Tonight me and the people ive just moved in with were all going out to a club. I was the only one who wasn’t talking to anyone. They were all drinking and shouting and joking with each other and I wasn’t saying a word. Its not as if thats the only situation I don’t fit in to though. Talking to people individuallys difficult for me aswell. they usually just nod while i’m speaking and barely reply. I try and ask them questions etc but usualy i get as few words as possible (I don’t want to here any rubish aboutclosed questions cause I try not to use them). It’s so painful, the atmosphere in any room I go into is just terrible. I look nervous aswell, I can’t help it I try and stop the twitchig etc but it dosnt work. In primary school i’d say I was quiet normal the problems started after that. I just couldn’t speak to anyone at high school and since then i’ve made less then a handful of freinds. Its starting to get really depressing now. Uni was supposed to be my way of prooving to myself that I could get along with people, Instead its just validated the fact that I can’t form relationships. I really don’t know how I can stop acting like this.

This open post was written 2 months, 1 week ago | V/U/S: 161, 8, 5 | Edit Post | Leave a reply | Report Post


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HelpBot offline Verified User (0 minutes) Shouts: 2 #
San Francisco, CA, US | 2 months, 1 week ago (0 minutes after post)

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Anonymous changed the tags on this post: they were "social problems, depression" 2 months, 1 week ago.

coffee.obses offline Verified User (6 months) Long Term User Shouts: 1 #
An Unknown Location | 2 months, 1 week ago (36 minutes after post)

I was in that same situation and suprisingly I’ve managed to pull myself almost completely out of it using the tips on this site I found…
hang on I’ll get the link…

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coffee.obses offline Verified User (6 months) Long Term User Shouts: 1 #
An Unknown Location | 2 months, 1 week ago (40 minutes after post)

http://www.positivityblog.com/index.p…

Look at as many articles as you can on it I found this and the Bruce Lee one to be aprticularly good.
I’d advice reading some of it everyday for the first while before you go out to meet people or before you go to bed so you can think about it while your drifting off. I did both, and it honestly worked.
Its really good advice! You just need to apply it! :)
good luck!

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lionrya offline Unverified User #
An Unknown Location | 2 months, 1 week ago (45 minutes after post)

I dont know you, so please dont be offended if i paint a poor portrait of you, but it sounds like you’re low on confidence. This can be both really easy and really hard to attain. You sound like an intelligent person, and i think maybe you just need to pull yourself out of this negative way of thinking. If you think “i feel really awkward around this person” it will show and the people around you will pick it up. If you think more positively you might find it pays off. I’m a fairly confident person but i too have my moments of social awkwardness, over the years i’ve managed to pull myself out of these. Just practise in scenario’s where it doesn’t matter in the slightest and try to relax. Honestly, try practising in shops or in the street, you’ll be surprised how much fun you can have just talking to randomers. And from this you’ll build up confidence and skills. Above all, remember, it won’t always be you, other people lack these skills too. Dont feel alone.

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coffee.obses offline Verified User (6 months) Long Term User Shouts: 1 #
An Unknown Location | 2 months, 1 week ago (51 minutes after post)

theyre right about practicing where it doesn’t matter actually that is very helpful :)

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Fey offline Verified User (2 months, 1 week) Shouts: 1 #
An Unknown Location | 2 months, 1 week ago (14 hours, 37 minutes after post)

I suck at meeting new people too. I find that most people just end up finding me annoying or weird so I tend to not bother. The way I’ve met quite a few of my friends was going out with a close confident friend and just hanging around them and having them introduce me to people. It was somewhat embarrassing to be like a limpet but she knew I had difficulty meeting people so she did her best to help me meet people. Also finding a place where there are people with similar interests, outlooks etc. really helps to find people who want to talk about the same things as you.

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ius offline Unverified User #
An Unknown Location | 2 months, 1 week ago (1 day, 4 hours after post)

You can’t be loved by others if you do not love yourself.

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