So my friend smokes weed… - Help.com

Hi, I use to smoke it and recently quit..
It fills a void. Has anything upset him recently?
Do all his friends do it too?

hey someing weed its not that bad really…just tell you dont care that he smokes just do good in school if you keep saying stuff on how bad its is the more he will do it

Thats good that his friends dont, as it becomes a social thing and harder to stop..
The parent break up will b the reason even if he is unaware of it..
Is he depressed?
Weed makes u put life on hold, it takes ‘now’ away and makes u happy.
I agree with frank… its no good telling him how bad it is.
He is showing he is hurting by doing it.. Guys often show their feelings through actions not words. How old is he?

It is bad to smoke it at any age but particually at his age when his brain is still developing.
Its up to him to want to stop. No one can make him…
but..
You can distract him, and invited him to places where smoking weed wouldn’y appeal so much..
Is he curently doing it just a home, or out socially?

Talk about the break up, talk about what he’s feeling.. it’s not about the weed (I always felt alcohol is much worse, weed can be psychologically addicting/not physical, but many things are worse or better no use discussing that).

About smoking weed, tell him to write before he starts smoking, at least make a note - so he can see if he’s starting to smoke more or less. Encourage him to find other ways to deal with his issues.

I can understand your frustration about feeling he’s throwing away money (and maybe a part of his life); remember everyone has a different way of coping, some more destructive and expensive then others. It’s all about finding that middle path - the balance.

Smoking pot is not that dangerous but it makes you lazy. You lose your ambition and are happy with less than you can achieve. For some it is not that bad but for others it ruins what they could have been.

I agree with Sigurros. People learn to cope with things in different ways and some arent the best ways. Ive seen it all, I know weed inst the most harmful drug to do but in alot of cases it opens a door to other things. People usually smoke alot when they have things going on that they just dont know how to handle it and weed will take their mind off of it for the time being. Its not good for your friend to be handling his problems like this but you cant be losing sleep and worrying so much over it. Its cool that you care for your friend so much to worry like this for him. Try and talk to him about his parents or something, dont bring up the weed and see if he will open up to you. Theres a good chance if you dont bring up the facts hes doing drugs he might stop talking to you for awhile. Be a friend and talk about whats going on with him, theres a good chance hell bring up his problems, then you can tell him its not good for him to handle his problems like that. If he doesnt open up to you, try and talk to your parents about it and see what they say. Just try and not get him in trouble.

How about you just mind your own business? What people do with their free time and money is their problem, not yours. You shouldn’t feel obligated to tell people what to do, or in this case, what not to do, just because you think it’s wrong. I for one love to smoke weed when I can and I wouldn’t like it if my friends tried to intervene. Step off your moral high horse for a bit and chill the f- out.

its not a big deal smokeing weed i know a few ppl that smoke it and have great jobs if it was a bad drug then i would say something just leave him he will be fine…

Sprite wrote:
How about you just mind your own business? What people do with their free time and money is their problem, not yours. You shouldn’t feel obligated to tell people what to do, or in this case, what not to do, just because you think it’s wrong. I for one love to smoke weed when I can and I wouldn’t like it if my friends tried to intervene. Step off your moral high horse for a bit and chill the f- out.

I don’t think this is about saying it’s wrong (or right) it’s about why, the reason this friend is using weed. I won’t deny that weed/pot also has good effects, proven medical uses against chronic pain etc.

When do you call something intervene & when do you call something care?

The poster even says “I don’t know much about drugs” and “I’m worried” I wonder why you feel the need to be so defensive.

Sigurrós wrote:
I don’t think this is about saying it’s wrong (or right) it’s about why, the reason this friend is using weed. I won’t deny that weed/pot also has good effects, proven medical uses against chronic pain etc.

When do you call something intervene & when do you call something care?

The poster even says “I don’t know much about drugs” and “I’m worried” I wonder why you feel the need to be so defensive.

No, it’s not. It is about the OP’s opinion on how smoking weed is bad, and how his/her friend is using it and they don’t like it because they don’t like weed (or drugs).

An intervention is only required when a person is in dire need of help, if they are hurting/killing themselves or doing this to other people. An intervention is an extreme measure for people the likes of meth addicts, alcoholics and crack heads. There is absolutely no reason at all to feel as if you need to intervene when your friend enjoys weed.

Care I believe is when a person with good intentions tries their best to help someone in need. And since many people are ill-educated on weed and how it is in fact not a ‘dangerous drug’, caring from a place of naivety and to exercise your moral stance on a subject or issue is not caring for someone, rather its an excuse for a platform to express your own irrelevant opinions.

Defensive? Maybe. Mostly I am just sick of hearing people talk about people who smoke weed are being dumb and stupid for doing what they do, that they are all lazy stoners with no ambitions, you can insert whatever negative description you want really. But this is not true. And on top of it all, OP doesn’t even know about drugs, and has never cared apparently? So why should someone who is not even educated about weed feel as though they are entitled to form an opinion and judge others accordingly, or feel as though they must approach a user when they are not even fully aware of what it is they’re doing?

Sorry to say but I think all the OP previously knew was bad, the great old drugs are bad, evil, sin (whatever); you have a good point about forming an opinion without information, it shouldn’t happen, but fact is everyone does it all the time, we just have to deal with it.

And it’s true people do force morals upon others of what they think is right or wrong (I do too, I just want the world to be a little better you know) but I also honestly believe (some) people on here really do care, not just as a word to throw away but they care.

I don’t really have a problem with people enjoying themselves, I just have a problem with things that may turn into a self destructive addiction.

ps. if OP was still posting I’d ask - what probably seems really strange but if this friend is more of an indica or sativa type - just to see if he’s been out online reading/learning about what the effects of pot actually are.. (sweet insomnia makes me say so many silly things, I should be quiet)

So sorry to hear he’s also into other drugs, that doesn’t sound too great.. is he getting any counselling or therapy, any help out there he can hold onto besides a friend?

And has this just been going on since his mom & dad split up, or did he use occasionally use before?

Maybe you can be the one to guide him to some local help - just giving an adress or a note might be cool. Then he can decide what to do with it.

Remind yourself you are a friend - there’s only so much you can do, you need take care of yourself too, don’t be dragged down if he is. Maybe talk to a someone at school to get some advice on what you can and can’t do.

futurebuckeye1 wrote:
this is an example of someone who cares for a friend that is messing his life up and is very confused. There is a point that one must not worry about someone elses business unless it is obvious that the person is hurting others around them. Have you ever thought about how you are making your family or friends feel? Your not only hurting yourself and your future, your hurting the people around you because they know you are much more of a person than that. Let go of your high and see reality.

Again I stress that what I do with my own time and money is my business, not anybody elses. Especially if I am not harming anybody with my recreational drug usage. Weed is, as I have already stated, harmless. Unless you have actually tried weed yourself you will continue to assume that it is harmful because that is what you have been lead to believe, based on no evidence and no real studies to prove that weed is harmful. The majority of people believe that weed is dangerous and if you know someone who smokes/inhales it, and are uneducated about the reality of weed, the usual reaction is “OMG LYK NOES he’s a druggie?!?!? What do I do?!?” which is why threads like this exist. I am telling you, and the OP, that there is no reason to want to intervene in somebody’s life if they smoke weed. It’s ridiculous. Now, if that person was a crack addict and needed a fix in order to survive each day without experiencing severe withdrawal symptoms, then sure I would totally support your concerns. But weed? Ridiculous.