Ring back and tell her that you’re not wanting any visitors because the house isn’t in good shape at the moment, especially with the painting going on.
I don’t blame you for being annoyed. It’s rude for someone to invite themselves over to another person’s home, even if you’re in laws.
Tell your hubby to call her and tell her ‘no thanks’.
Anonymous
#
2 months, 1 week ago (13 hours, 3 minutes after post)
Thank you for the ideas. I did ask h to talk to her. He doesn’t really care that the place looks like a tornado hit it. He said “Well, they’re family. They don’t care. They’ve painted before too. They know what it’s like.” urgh! He isn’t the one that people assume would be in charge of the housework, so naturally I worry that it will make me look bad. My consolation prize is that I knoow it will look better than before, once I have the projects completed. :D Too bad they won’t get to see that part. :( Oh well, there is nothing else I can do about it, so it’s time for me to get to work.
r u ok with that? If you’re not u need to insist with hubby
Anonymous
#
2 months, 1 week ago (13 hours, 15 minutes after post)
No, I’m not really ok with it, but I made a REALLY LONG list of chores and put his name beside about 25 things. The kids and I have lists too. It should be much quicker with the help, but I’m afraid that I’ll end up being up most of the night again. Last night I was up until 2, baby got up at 3, then we slept from 3:30 until 5. Then I was up for good at 8 ish. I feel very busy!
You need to take it easy. Suggest he take the kids and visit with his sis at McDonalds.
Anonymous
#
2 months, 1 week ago (18 hours, 8 minutes after post)
Just saw this now. I have 20 out of a list of 59 things finished, including many of the bigger things. They are done well too. I’ve even managed to finish painting the wall. :D I’m getting there, slowly but surely. I’m rather annoyed at h more than at his sister at the moment. She didn’t know about the state of affairs around here. He did and he is being rather slow about helping, though he is doing some things. At least with the list, he can’t say that he doesn’t know what to do next. I gave him no excuses. He usually really good. He just has too many other things on his agenda. Oh well, his can wait until tomorrow, since mine all has to. :P
Anonymous
#
2 months, 1 week ago (23 hours, 41 minutes after post)
I only have 22 things left to do on my list. I feel busier than a mother nursing triplets :P but my house is starting to take shape now. :D
yeah…you should go to bed.
Once my sis-in-law did this to me. I left the house a wreck. When she arrived I went out and left her standing on the doorstep. Yeah..I made a scene. Was the last time y hubby didn’t take my feelings into consideration concerning visits from his relatives.
Anonymous
#
2 months, 1 week ago (23 hours, 58 minutes after post)
I’d feel really bad. She doesn’t live too close to us, and has an appointment near us. She just said that they’d drop in on Monday. No idea of a time. H didn’t call her back. He actually asked me tonight if I called her. Nope. I was too busy cleaning. The livingroom is completely put back together, except for my messy desk. Two other rooms are close to perfection. two others, welllllll, um…they still look like a big tornado hit. (for real!) I have to admit, I did coonsider just making sure that we weren’t home. I think that he’ll think twice. after he got started helping, I never let him sit still. That’ll teach him. HAHA.
Anonymous
#
2 months, 1 week ago (1 day after post)
:) I think that I should follow your advice. my bed is yelling for me. LOL
Anonymous
#
2 months, 1 week ago (1 day, 10 hours after post)
Well, she isn’t here yet. That means that i still have time. I’m only here bc I am fedding the baby, then it’s right back to work for me. I keep adding to the list as I go andI break things into smaller chores so that I look successful. :P I have h doing the dishes right now.
I have 26 chores left to do, out of 66.
(60% finished, that’s barely a pass, but a pass is better than a fail)
:D
That’s when I come on, too. When I’m feeding my baby.
Anonymous
#
2 months, 1 week ago (1 day, 14 hours after post)
They were here, and nnow they are gone. I have 18/66 things left to do. My house looks like “clean sweep” came through! Baby is sleeping now, back to work for me. :D
It’s wonderful that u got so much done!
Anonymous
#
2 months, 1 week ago (1 day, 20 hours after post)
Thanks, I have 14 things left, out of 67. (roughly 80%) All of those things, on top of the baby, homework, supper and dishes. I’m tired now! :P
well i have to hand it to you, i don’t know if i could have done all that in so little time. I have a situation myself and it’s been pretty hard to deal with. So i need some advice bad. My mother-inlaw’s husband passed away in January, after he passes she needed to get away from here, she sold her house, moved to where her granddaugter and daughter lived about 5 hours from me. after a month she was complaining about dizziness really bad and headaches, and all sorts of problems with her apartment that she was staying in by herself. Her daughter and granddaughter was supposed to help her with things, they did but only at their convience. Anyway my husband and i visited her quite often since she moved and due to all the problems she was having decided to see if she wanted to move back. She did, and stayed with us about a month. And was going to moved into the housing here for the elderly. Well that day came but instead wound up in the ER and sent to the hospital. She found out she had brain cancer. Had surgery a month ago and they couldn’t get it all. So now she is on hospice and i am the only income we have, and my husband, his 2 sister’s and brother along with their spouses or others have been in and out of the house, to be with their mom. Ok this is the delima, My sister-inlaw thinks that the washer and dryer is to be going at all times, she can cook when she feels like it but the mess is left for me when i come home from work. Most of the time i cook when i get home from work for my husband and whoever else is eating, i habe no help cleaning it up either. Last night my mother-inlaw asked me about her mom’s medicine, if i had picked it up from the pharmacy, i said no cause no one told me too. She said well i was the one who had been doing it so she assumed i did. Well the pharmacy had closed by this time. My husband told her it wasn’t my job and i have been picking it up if asked to not assuming to always do it. after that i called the manager of the pharmacy at 10pm to see if i could get due to severity of my mother-inlaw condition. So i got it at 10:30pm, and stayed up till 1pm helping my husband with things then had to get up at 6am for work. Ok today when i go home from lunch i thought well she ain’t going anywhere i might as well swallow my pride and make amends with her. So i said i am sorry about the miss understand over her medicine but it got fixed anfd all is ok, she said fine, but i was also aggervated over the laundry, i said what, she said i washed all the clothes out of the bathroom except hers and it pissed her off. I immediately said the clothes in the bathroom were towels and i don’t wash colored and towels together. She smarted off and said well i do. Oh my God. i know this is a difficult time with the terminal condition of my husbands mother but i and not kissing no ones a**. I do whatever my husband asked and my mother-inlaw needs done or she asked of me. I am no ones maid but how is it that they can make a mess but no one can clean up after themselves. I don’t want anything to happen to my mother-inlaw at all she is a graet woman, very dear to me as well. But my sister-law is getting on my nerves. i want her to have respect for me in my house with out me seeming like a ***** to her if i suggest or say anything to her. My brother-inlaw is ok and mother other sister-law was her but she left after she when through her mam’s belongings and got what she wanted and got into a heated argument with my brother-inlaw. Help me please…
This account has been deactivated.
Speak to your husband about it. He should have a talk to her. She is his relative.
Anonymous
#
1 month, 3 weeks ago (2 weeks, 3 days after post)
Write a list of dates for who is responsible for which chores. If they are there, they should be helping out. That’s what I did, and nobody really said anything, they just got them done.
I’d write and stick this on the fridge. (change to suit your needs, but just as an idea)
Sunday: change bedding, Towels and bedding get washed, garbage gets emptied
Monday: reds get washed, capets get vacuumed,organise one closet/dresser
Tuesdays: Bathroom gets a cleaning, Floors get mopped
Wednesday: windows get cleaned, darks get washed, clean out fridge
Thursday: dusting, garbage gets emptied, toilet, water plants
Friday: Carpets get vacuumed, whites get washed, organise one closet/dresser
Saturday: Dish towels/cloths get washed, mirrors get cleaned, running around
Everybody is responsible for their own lunch meal, including clean up of stove/microwave and dishes.
If any running around needs to be done (dry cleaning, pharmacy, clothes donation, groceries, returning items, recycling) it can be put on a list on the fridge and left for Saturday.
Tell them that the reason that you do it this way is for the environment and to avoid paying extra for the soap and electricity with half loads because you need to stretch the dollars because of having one income.
They’d have no excuse for not helping. I’d even go as far as to write where you keep the vacuum bags, rags, garbage bags and toilet bowl cleaner if you think that they’d need the tip. :P
My step kids use to wait until after clothes came out of that dryer to say that they forgot to put something in. I told them ” The next day that I was darks is on —–, so you should get it back by then. This way, it made them responsible for it. It helped to reduce my stress level.
I hope that this help.
TrinityDefinitely
Cell
call