life help: What advise would you have for someone who is in a relationship with a guy who is abusive.

hazelwood

What advise would you have for someone who is in a relationship with a guy who is abusive.

We aren’t married, but we have kids together and we live together. He has a job and I’m getting unemployment. I feel like all we do is argue and fight. He has told other people not just myself that I’m his property and so are the kids and that we aren’t going anywhere. He has also said that he would kill me before the kids and I left him. I’ve told him before that I’m tired of arguing and fighting and that we are over. When that is said I gain a bruise, it feels like, for every word I said. I wrecked my car in February of 2009 so getting away from him will be a challenge. Oh and not to mention when I did have a car and I wanted to get out of the house for a while, he has taken extra measures and popped all four of my tires so that I can’t go anywhere. I want out of this relationship, I want to live without worrying whats going to happen next. I want to be able to wake up one day and not have to fight to stay alive. I want to leave him without somebody getting killed in the process.

This open post was written 1 month, 2 weeks ago | V/U/S: 179, 10, 6 | Edit Post | Leave a reply | Report Post

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Since writing this post hazelwood may have helped people, but has not within the last 4 days. hazelwood is a verified member, has been around for 1 month, 2 weeks and has 1 posts and 2 replies to their name.

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classicrock1818 76 #
An Unknown Location | 1 month, 2 weeks ago (0 minutes after post)

get out of it

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hazelwood 0 #
An Unknown Location | 1 month, 2 weeks ago (2 minutes after post)

um i need more advise then that you ******* moron

xxrpsnickersx 1 #
An Unknown Location | 1 month, 2 weeks ago (9 minutes after post)

If you have physical bruises that show, go to the police. Yeah he is the father of your kids, but it’s totally not right that he calls you his property or touches you like that. Call them, get help, see what they can do to help you get out of that situation and try to start over.

Does your family know about this?

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vivzofwale 5 #
An Unknown Location | 1 month, 2 weeks ago (15 minutes after post)

agreed, go to the police and tell.

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hazelwood 0 #
An Unknown Location | 1 month, 2 weeks ago (21 minutes after post)

Only a few friends know about it….

SilverVeggieMoon 1 #
An Unknown Location | 1 month, 2 weeks ago (40 minutes after post)

I vote police.
If that doesn’t work…
You do whatever you can.
That includes finding a really strong person to beat the crap out of him so you can take the kids and run. But if you do that, you might run into legal troubles. Definitely look into getting full custody of your children so he can’t get to you once you’re gone.

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agaperoot 336 #
An Undisclosed Location | 1 month, 2 weeks ago (1 hour, 2 minutes after post)

Hi, you are being really brave by trying to get help and leave. Be very careful that he is not reading these posts after you are done with them. He is to dangerous to try to leave on your own, I think that you need to call the police and explain what is going on, they have the ability to help you to stay safe and keep him away. I had to put a restraining order on an ex boyfriend, and it was scary.
I had to plan when to leave and did it all when he was at work, then stayed in hiding from him for a long time.
I think that you are past that, he will walk through a restraining order and do whatever he wants. You should seriously try to get into protection with the police to help you and your kids and you may have to leave everything else behind to do it. You have to document what he has done to you with photos if you can, and tell the police everything so they can put him away for awhile. I am sorry that you have to deal with this, I hope that you will be safe and get away from this situation as soon as you can. Hugs…stay strong.

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courtybubble 176 #
An Undisclosed Location | 1 month, 2 weeks ago (1 hour, 31 minutes after post)

hazelwood wrote:
um i need more advise then that you ******* moron

youre fairly abusive yourself there sunshine.
that posters advice is probably the best youre gonna get.
sums up everyones elses advice ina nice, succinct, sentence, doesnt it.

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xxrpsnickersx 1 #
An Unknown Location | 1 month, 1 week ago (23 hours, 20 minutes after post)

courtybubble wrote:

hazelwood wrote:
um i need more advise then that you ******* moron

youre fairly abusive yourself there sunshine.
that posters advice is probably the best youre gonna get.
sums up everyones elses advice ina nice, succinct, sentence, doesnt it.

very much true.

agaperoot wrote:
Hi, you are being really brave by trying to get help and leave. Be very careful that he is not reading these posts after you are done with them. He is to dangerous to try to leave on your own, I think that you need to call the police and explain what is going on, they have the ability to help you to stay safe and keep him away. I had to put a restraining order on an ex boyfriend, and it was scary.
I had to plan when to leave and did it all when he was at work, then stayed in hiding from him for a long time.
I think that you are past that, he will walk through a restraining order and do whatever he wants. You should seriously try to get into protection with the police to help you and your kids and you may have to leave everything else behind to do it. You have to document what he has done to you with photos if you can, and tell the police everything so they can put him away for awhile. I am sorry that you have to deal with this, I hope that you will be safe and get away from this situation as soon as you can. Hugs…stay strong.

i agree with you, it all may be hell before it gets better, but it’ll completely be worth it in the end.

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hazelwood edited this post 1 month ago. Read the previous text »

What advise would you have for someone who is in a relationship with a guy who is abusive. We aren’t married, but we have kids together and we live together. He has a job and I’m getting unemployment. I feel like all we do is argue and fight. He has told other people not just myself that I’m his property and so are the kids and that we aren’t going anywhere. I’ve told him before that I’m tired of arguing and fighting and that we are over. When that is said I gain a bruise, it feels like, for every word I said. I wrecked my car in February of 2009 so getting away from him will be a challenge. Oh and not to mention when I did have a car and I wanted to get out of the house for a while, he has taken extra measures and popped all four of my tires so that I can’t go anywhere. I want out of this relationship, I want to live without worrying whats going to happen next. I want to be able to wake up one day and not have to fight to stay alive. I want to leave him without somebody getting killed in the process.

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What advise would you have for someone who is in a relationship with a guy who is abusive.

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