Im In Love With A Heroin Addict.

mcm4229

Im In Love With A Heroin Addict.

I’ve been with my boyfriend since i was 15. I love him more than anything but sometimes I Can hate him just as much. He introduced me to oxycottons when I was 16 and I couldnt get enough of them. I didnt have a job so he would buy them. We did them together almost everyday for about two months. One day when i didnt have any left I started jonesing, felt like i was dying, and I thought to myself “I absolutely hate this. I;m never doing it again”. And I didnt, and i made sure he never did it around me or was high around me, and then he eventually stopped too and things were good. About two months ago he was at my house and I knew he was high. We fought, he said he was sorry and he wouldnt do it again. Couple days later, noticed he was high again, we fought and broke up. A Few days later I find out from a very reliable source he’s on straight up heroin. I was shocked, in total denial. But when I thought about it, it made perfect sense, he was acting so shady and treating me like ********, like he didnt care about anything anymore. So I took the tough love approach and told his family everything, knowing he would probably hate me for it. He moved back into his mom’s house(she’s a RN so i thought she’d be helpful, maybe), where he withdrawled and hes been clean for about a week, which i know isnt long at all but to someone who’s addicted its a lifetime. My problem is I dont know what to do from here. Ive seen him a few times since then, Ive talked to him everyday, just so he knows Im still gonna be here for him, Im always gonna be his friend. But should I keep in contact with him? or should I not and make him realize what he’s lost to drugs so that he’ll feel motivated to get clean? And yes he’s in a better envirnment now, his mom always makes sure he knows where hes at and with who, but is it enough? or is rehab the only answer? Im so confused and out of my league here. Plus, Ive lost my best friend and first love so im dealing with my own pain. Please help anything and everything is appreciated..

This open post was written 1 month, 2 weeks ago | V/U/S: 180, 19, 7 | Edit Post | Leave a reply | Report Post

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Replies (19)

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Sir Tannen 76 #
Emeryville, CA, US | 1 month, 2 weeks ago (3 minutes after post)

No offense, but this all sounds sorta retarded that you stayed with a guy like that.

Help me with: How long do roses take to plant n’ when?

(>'')>~~~Kyle 6 #
An Unknown Location | 1 month, 2 weeks ago (10 minutes after post)

SirTannen wrote:
No offense, but this all sounds sorta retarded that you stayed with a guy like that.

Lol, I’m in love with marijuana :P, but you definitly have to pace yourself to stay away from addiction. I’ve only gotten high twice, and it’s fun, but it’s probably a good thing you are cracking down on the heroin. That will kill him at a pretty young age if he sticks with that.

Help me with: Why are scholarships so **** difficult?

Gynan Tonix 10 #
An Unknown Location | 1 month, 2 weeks ago (21 minutes after post)

SirTannen wrote:
No offense, but this all sounds sorta retarded that you stayed with a guy like that.

that was helpful.

anyways, you’ve made some very wise choices already, so i don’t see why you shouldn’t keep doing that ;) my advice would be : take it slow. he needs to feel motivated to stay clean, as you pointed out, a lot longer then just one week, but in time, he’ll just be clean again, and you can take it from there. should you stay in contact with him? seems like you got enough grip on your life so you’re not at risk, so it pretty much comes down to ‘do you want to?’ if so, why not - if you both love each other, the past shouldn’t make things impossible… but be honest with yourself, very honest.

Central 141 #
An Unknown Location | 1 month, 2 weeks ago (23 minutes after post)

Drop everything and anything you have with him.

Help me with: If I buy a used military Humvee with the back top on where people can sit, do I need a special license for it and do they have seat belts?

Sir Tannen 76 #
Emeryville, CA, US | 1 month, 2 weeks ago (29 minutes after post)

Central has the central idea.

Help me with: How long do roses take to plant n’ when?

Gynan Tonix 10 #
An Unknown Location | 1 month, 2 weeks ago (31 minutes after post)

what are you guys even doing on a help site?

the minute someone gets into serious problems, like an addiction, you’d turn your backs and run?

Sir Tannen 76 #
Emeryville, CA, US | 1 month, 2 weeks ago (33 minutes after post)

I help depressed people most of the time, there seems to be an abundant amount here.

Help me with: How long do roses take to plant n’ when?

Sir Tannen 76 #
Emeryville, CA, US | 1 month, 2 weeks ago (34 minutes after post)

And a number of relationship ones. Tho I am sorta against drug abuse.

Help me with: How long do roses take to plant n’ when?

Sir Tannen 76 #
Emeryville, CA, US | 1 month, 2 weeks ago (34 minutes after post)

Oh wait, you’re getting a tad off topic Gynan. If you want to make a big freaking deal about this post a question.

Help me with: How long do roses take to plant n’ when?

Gynan Tonix 10 #
An Unknown Location | 1 month, 2 weeks ago (39 minutes after post)

i just think it’s not really helpful when someone comes here with issues and questions, and you’re answer is something along the lines of ‘you sound retarded’

but hey, just as long as you’re against drug abuse, it’s all good.

Sir Tannen 76 #
Emeryville, CA, US | 1 month, 2 weeks ago (41 minutes after post)

lol, not saying that she’s retarded but the thought that she stayed with an obvious drug abuser and even took up using drugs herself.

Help me with: How long do roses take to plant n’ when?

hughes.gra 4 #
An Unknown Location | 1 month, 2 weeks ago (52 minutes after post)

Central wrote:
Drop everything and anything you have with him.

Central, I realize you are only 15, but surely you cannot hope to aspire to live in a cooperative community and profess to be a Christian and say the things you do on these boards. Its hypocritical. Would Jesus just drop the guy and avoid him. Think about it.

Sir Tannen 76 #
Emeryville, CA, US | 1 month, 2 weeks ago (53 minutes after post)

Anyone else notice that nobody here is talking about the girl, we are all just insulting each other? I’m fine with it and all but it seem a little bastardly of all of you.

Help me with: How long do roses take to plant n’ when?

hughes.gra 4 #
An Unknown Location | 1 month, 2 weeks ago (54 minutes after post)

In answer to the poster. I would say beyond your own feelings, you need to consult with whoever is this young man’s main health provider. If that is his mom, speak to her, although I would prefer you direct your query to individuals who deal regularly with addiction and recovery. Find out what they recommend in terms of interaction. I would assume that supporting the recovering addict emotionally is vital, as long as those surrounding him are stable and substance free.

Central 141 #
An Unknown Location | 1 month, 2 weeks ago (1 hour, 11 minutes after post)

Gynan Tonix wrote:
what are you guys even doing on a help site?

the minute someone gets into serious problems, like an addiction, you’d turn your backs and run?

You do not want to get youself involved in drugs do you? And if he’s already been “helped” before he is hopeless and he has to want to stop by himself and admit he has a problem or else your puttng yourself in jeapordy and he’s just running in circles!

Help me with: If I buy a used military Humvee with the back top on where people can sit, do I need a special license for it and do they have seat belts?

Cell 63 #
Winnipeg, MB, CA | 1 month, 2 weeks ago (1 hour, 19 minutes after post)

I think you need to think about your future and the future of your future children.

My brother is a drug addict and his girlfriend stayed with him and married him. She works all day while he stays home and gets high. She does all the cleaning and cooking. While she gets some sleep so she can go to work the next day he goes out to party and get drunk.

I hope they never have kids. I honestly feel it is just a matter of time before she leaves him.

She could have saved herself a lot of pain.

You can, too.

Help me with: I’m feeling a little lost…When you have your own business how do you know how to prioritize?

hughes.gra 4 #
An Unknown Location | 1 month, 2 weeks ago (1 hour, 24 minutes after post)

Yes

Cell wrote:
I think you need to think about your future and the future of your future children.

My brother is a drug addict and his girlfriend stayed with him and married him. She works all day while he stays home and gets high. She does all the cleaning and cooking. While she gets some sleep so she can go to work the next day he goes out to party and get drunk.

I hope they never have kids. I honestly feel it is just a matter of time before she leaves him.

She could have saved herself a lot of pain.

You can, too.

Yes - I would agree with Cell. It is one thing to support the man in this recovery phase as a friend, it is another to consider anything beyond that. I would practice emotional detachment and consider the romance side of the thing dead. Perhaps after 5 years of being clean and getting his life in order you might consider something more, but honestly if he is even a bit liable to backslide into it you are setting yourself up for a lifetime of misery.

Central 141 #
An Unknown Location | 1 month, 2 weeks ago (2 hours, 56 minutes after post)

Amen

Help me with: If I buy a used military Humvee with the back top on where people can sit, do I need a special license for it and do they have seat belts?

mcm4229 0 #
An Unknown Location | 1 month, 2 weeks ago (4 hours, 2 minutes after post)

Thanks everyone for all the input. Yeah, it might seem “retarted” that i stayed with a guy like this but I was young and dumb and now im finally waking up and thats all that matters. And yeah he has a problem but that doesnt make him a horrible person he’s just messed up. Anyways, thanks again you’re really helping me, and the arguement was quite entertaining by the way lol.

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Im In Love With A Heroin Addict. - Help.com