Love help: Boys, I need your help ! - Help.com

You can have him on your mind and still not be one of his girls. Just be a friend and chat with him.There are lots of fish in the sea.

Yeah, I know that…for sure.
I think its so stupid that I let myself get this way, you would think I would have learned…
but I can’t help who I like, and it sucks.
He just always seems to come back - and I always assume its just because he wants to be friends, but then something always happens to make it more. So I avoid him, because I know I’m just going to get hurt…but he always comes to me…
Oh dear, I must sound like a nutcase.
I’m sorry =)

You are not a nutcase. There is always the possibility that he’s toying with you just like a cat and mouse. He’s very experienced and he can read what you are going through maybe.

I think you should take control.
Ignore him, see what he does.
Act busy or like you’re too good or don’t have time for him. See if tries to get your attention in any way.
If he’s bad, doesn’t mean he can’t change. You never know, you might be driving him just as crazy.
This is me being positive but heck why not!

I’m a guy and I end up hurting most of the girls that have feelings for me. Not because I’m trying to or because I’m the party type, but rather just because I’m an idiot. I also liked this one girl that everyone kept telling me to stay away from. Now that it’s over, I think in hindsight that I should have listened. This might be one case in which you should listen to your reasoning more than your feelings.

Wow, I this advice is really good, thankyou !

Time traveller: I think your smart, and definately onto something…Everyday I see him I either end up hating him, or seemingly loving him more - the thing is, I can’t let him know how I feel because I think it is just what he wants, and would add to his ego even more…

Summer rain: I’ve tried ignoring him, it doesn’t last very long. Mostly because he has the ability to make me smile just by looking at me…I always act busy, and like I don’t have enough time, and he always comes back - but I never quite know for sure what he wants.
And I’m pretty sure I do drive him crazy…I’m the one who won’t let him into her pants =) I seriously don’t want to string any guy along, I can imagine how annoying it would be. But I am deadly serious, this boy is the most confusing I have ever met !

Almost elysium: Why do you say your an idiot? Is it because you don’t want anyone to get too attached because your scared that the further it goes the more they are going to get hurt?? I don’t mean to pry for info or anything, I’m just curious… I really want to understand !! I agree, feelings definately get in the way - you think you know the answer and then bam ! You see this person, and all these stupid feelings come back !!!

I just want somebody to have fun with (but at the same time not get hurt)…since when did everything get so complicated??

I never did anything as dramatic as sleeping with someone’s best friend, but between moving away, losing interest, saying the wrong thing and hurting her feelings, being “mysterious” whatever that complaint means, and the basic not liking a girl back, I’ve causes my fair share of conflicts. I actually care though. You have to remember that there guys who simply don’t care. They’re the worst kind. I knew some guys in college that would shamelessly take advantage of any girl they could. Just be careful. By the way, I don’t mean to imply that of him. Just a general warning.

No, that is very helpful…thankyou.
I am pretty sure he is the kind that doesn’t care. He is into the whole ‘friends with benefits’ thing and goes out to pick up chicks…
He is young, gorgeous and in college. He’s had lots of girls - but he’s never had me - this is why I think he persists with me.
But, I always have felt we have something more…but I always remind myself this is complete and utter crap. I know how he is, and I know how I am (which is the complete opposite, i like to have a good time - but not that way)…I know that I really shouldn’t care about him because he probably doesn’t even think about me at all.
I just can’t help it though. I’ve tried to move on, it lasts a few months and then he comes back again…I really hate it ! **** emotions !! He would have to be the most confusing person I have ever met, and I chose to like him.
Stupid stupid girl…
But it is really good to get advice from guys, thanks =)

He sounds like those guys that just want to sleep with you, like it’s more of a challenge or something they wants to prove to themselves, that they can get any girl. Once they get what they want, that’s it they’re gone and you’re another number.

Even if you do end up going out with him, and I’m not encouraging it in any way, don’t give him what he wants. Stick to who you are and what you believe. That way you really wouldn’t have anything to lose.

You’ll forget about him. I think you’re letting yourself get carried away for a bit of fun, just so you can have something to think about I guess, but you know you won’t give him what he wants, and when it comes down to it you’re actually in control. Well that’s what I do sometimes anyway

Definately, Thinking about the whole situation I think that is the case for sure.
But then when I see him I feel these intense emotions, its crazy, I love it…I just wish I had them for a good guy - not one who wants to crush my spirit !

Haha, and I like the being in control part. The funny thing is a one of his friends like me, I hung out with them for a bit - and he got jealous (which was kinda my intention, not that I wanted him - I just was interested in seeing what would happen) But then he started giving me more attention, and I realised I liked it, and my thoughts became a mess again.
So really, I am my own worst enemy, lol.

I just need to stop seeing him around. Its so hard in a smallish town.
OOOhhh dear.
=)
PS thankyou !