depression help: Please, I just need somebody to talk to right now. - Help.com

Please, I just need somebody to talk to right now.

I feel like I am falling apart and I am twenty years old; and there is nothing that any doctor can find that is seriously wrong. The only clue is that I have “subclinical” hypothyroidism, which means that the levels are low but not low enough to cause my symptoms… or at least not according to accepted medical literature. I am gaining weight despite my desperate attempts at staying thin- but no diet nor any ammount of excersise has made an impact in the continuous weight gain. It isn’t super fast- only 30 lbs in the last six months… but I just can’t stop it. I can’t remember anything- which makes studying pretty hard. I don’t even remember the beginning of conversations sometimes, even though I am paying attention… though sometimes my mind just wanders so much that I can’t even muster attention. I can’t sleep at night, I can’t stay awake during the day, I have incredible mood swings- so that even though I was happy earlier today all that I want to do now is die (I’m not suicidal, I just don’t want to exist anymore). Just in case the thyroid was my problem I tried a medication, and it seemed to help a bit- but after having been on it for a little over a month I began to have weirder and weirder things happen to me- I am not taking it anymore, but am now covered in hives (this prompted me to go off of the medication, but has persisted for more than eight days)… the doc. is unconvinced that it was the medication in the first place.

Neither my body nor my mind belong to me anymore… I wish that there was just a reset button that I could hit… Outside I am happy but inside I am screaming and tearing out my hair. Are there any suggestions out there- I will try anything at this point, I am desperate. I just can’t go on like this… If I do, I will lose what is left of my mind.

This closed post was written 1 month, 2 weeks ago | V/U/S: 134, 7, 2 | Edit Post | Report Post

depression, Hypothyroidism, Desperation (How Tags Affect Reciprocity)

HelpBot 3 #
San Francisco, CA, US | 1 month, 2 weeks ago (0 minutes after post)

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jpfeffe #
An Unknown Location | 1 month, 2 weeks ago (2 minutes after post)

Just in case anybody besides the bot reads this and thinks that I would actually kill myself, I am NOT suicidal.

Just in case anybody besides the bot reads this and thinks that I would actually kill myself, I am NOT suicidal.

This account has been deactivated.

Anonymous #
1 month, 2 weeks ago (3 minutes after post)

i completely get that feeling of being one person on the outside and being someone else on the inside and wishing you could restart… just… start over. not live this life. i’m not suicidal but i don’t want this life either.

my mom has hypothyroidism & did a diet that is close to the zone diet but it’s a program here in town called metabolic research center. it worked for her in an amazing 6 months she lost 75 lbs and stopped gaining weight.

i had hives for 2 weeks in high school from stress. go to the doctor maybe for a cortizone shot?

i completely get that feeling of being one person on the outside and being someone else on the inside and wishing you could restart... just... start over. not live this life. i'm not suicidal but i don't want this life either. my mom has hypothyroidism & did a diet that is close to the zone diet but it's a program here in town called metabolic research center. it worked for her in an amazing 6 months she lost 75 lbs and stopped gaining weight. i had hives for 2 weeks in high school from stress. go to the doctor maybe for a cortizone shot?

Almost Elysium 1 #
An Unknown Location | 1 month, 2 weeks ago (7 minutes after post)

Hey what’s up? I’m not a professional or anything. I’m 24 and similar in ways to you. If you’re studying then that must mean that you’re in school and if you’re 20 then you’re probably in college right? You school might have a martial arts club that you could join. It’s fun, it makes it easy to make friends, it’s potentially useful, it’s exercise, and it’s cool. Even if it doesn’t help you with your weight problem, it’s still killing multiple birds with one stone.
I’ve also read extensively about optimism and its benefits. I personally haven’t been able to pull off the optimism thing, but it’s a thought.
Anyhow hang in there.

Hey what's up? I'm not a professional or anything. I'm 24 and similar in ways to you. If you're studying then that must mean that you're in school and if you're 20 then you're probably in college right? You school might have a martial arts club that you could join. It's fun, it makes it easy to make friends, it's potentially useful, it's exercise, and it's cool. Even if it doesn't help you with your weight problem, it's still killing multiple birds with one stone. I've also read extensively about optimism and its benefits. I personally haven't been able to pull off the optimism thing, but it's a thought. Anyhow hang in there.

jpfeffe #
An Unknown Location | 1 month, 2 weeks ago (12 minutes after post)

Yeah, I am in college- I love it, and actually despite everything have been doing alright- though only one of my teachers actually knows what is going on. The rest don’t think that I work hard, as I am forced to miss a lot of class, but I just can’t tell them- it seems too much like an excuse to me. I have always been raised to “adapt and overcome” no matter what the obstacle. The only reason that the one knows is because he is my friend.

There is no martial arts club here, but I did do karate for a while. I liked it, but as I am a full time student and work 2 jobs I just don’t have time. I would go now, if anything was open at 2 in the morning… but alas, I seem to be the only insomniac here.

Yeah, I am in college- I love it, and actually despite everything have been doing alright- though only one of my teachers actually knows what is going on. The rest don't think that I work hard, as I am forced to miss a lot of class, but I just can't tell them- it seems too much like an excuse to me. I have always been raised to "adapt and overcome" no matter what the obstacle. The only reason that the one knows is because he is my friend. There is no martial arts club here, but I did do karate for a while. I liked it, but as I am a full time student and work 2 jobs I just don't have time. I would go now, if anything was open at 2 in the morning... but alas, I seem to be the only insomniac here.

This account has been deactivated.

jpfeffe #
An Unknown Location | 1 month, 2 weeks ago (16 minutes after post)

I try hard to stay optimistic, and I realize that my life is pretty great besides this. I have a wonderful supportive family, a steady relationship that has gone on for over two years now, and I have all that I need to live comfortably- except my health. It’s just hard- I have always been the perfect girl- a quick learner, ambitious, and (as superficial as it is) hot. Now I am the fat idiot. As I have said, I am aware that it could be much worse- but right now, I just need to vent a little.

I try hard to stay optimistic, and I realize that my life is pretty great besides this. I have a wonderful supportive family, a steady relationship that has gone on for over two years now, and I have all that I need to live comfortably- except my health. It's just hard- I have always been the perfect girl- a quick learner, ambitious, and (as superficial as it is) hot. Now I am the fat idiot. As I have said, I am aware that it could be much worse- but right now, I just need to vent a little.

This account has been deactivated.

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