Love help: White Lone Wolf

jromerog

White Lone Wolf

Why God why?
Over the years I trusted her with my life, I had my faith in her. And she left me in the cold winter snow. I don’t understand anymore. I know her heart is not cold. I want help not only her but the others that I have betrayed, and hurt. People tell me to move on, but I can’t. The feelings inside of me the guilt, the pain, the sorrow. But theirs their is anger, fuststration, betrayal, a wolf inner instincts. I don’t know what to do. I hate feeling this way. I don’t want to be a bad person, I don’t. Either way I have become a burden to them, all of them. The people that trusted me now hate me. But I don’t want to hate them back for not understanding me. I can hear voices saying to forget them they were worthless but my heart says to have faith in them. I try my best to move forward but it haunts me everyday. Is this what a burden feels like a stab in the heart continously like a stone tablet ingraved into my head. Is it the medication they have gave me or was it surgery they had on me or I’m still in recovery from the nightmares. Is this all a dream? Everything happen soo fast, hit by a car, lungs colapse, death expereince, head surgery, losing a good friend, then losing more of them, family turns their back on you. Then lighting strikes getting a letter saying discharge. What’s going on why is this happening what is the reason.
Why couldn’t I held onto the friendship, but I knew where they were coming from…. there version….. there story…..
She was affraid of me, she saw a different me, she saw the weak wolf broken into pieces and she left me there to die. It was too much for her. I knew it was to much for her in the very beginning. That’s why I didn’t tell her or anyone why I was going to the army and when did tell people I never told them the true reason. Only one person I told knows the truth but even her mother didn’t even understand. Niether did my family. Cast away from everyone. Is my heart too big that I care soo much or is it just instanity?
When I try to reason the real words from me never come out. Who’s is their left to talk to. Everyone that I once cared about has left me to drown. I can hear it…. everyone saying that I’m feeling sorry for myself. Ha…. I howl at you. I have no pity on myself, I just hate being alone. Im always an out cast, the nice guy always comes last, person. But I am strong. I will always care for those who I made promises to. No matter how many times they hit me down or flip off or stab me in the back. I will always get back up and still be thier by their side . I am loyal, honorable, respectful, faithful, and strong. I now know that people can never be there for me because they will never understand my pain, my sorrows, my burdens, they will never understand me. And I don’t want them to. But If they promise me that they will never leave me. I’ll vow to always to be there for them and when the world gives them a 100 reasons to cry I’ll give them 1000 reasons to smile.
-Aaron Romero
(white lone wolf)

This open post was written 1 month ago | V/U/S: 124, 13, 2 | Edit Post | Leave a reply | Report Post

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Since writing this post jromerog may have helped people, but has not within the last 4 days. jromerog is a verified member, has been around for 1 month and has 3 posts and 14 replies to their name.

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Love, friends, poem, Family, Problems, betrayel, friendship, trust, god (How Tags Affect Reciprocity)

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Helper626 11 #
An Unknown Location | 4 weeks ago (2 days, 11 hours after post)

A Loyal friend… boy you don’t find many of them these days.
I’m here to talk if you want to. I’m sorry they have abondoned you but you have your own path to follow and some people may not understand why we do the things we do but thats cause its not their path.
Good Luck my friend

jromerog 0 #
An Unknown Location | 4 weeks ago (2 days, 12 hours after post)

Thank you that means alot to me. My name is Aaron i would happy to talk to you.

Help me with: How do I get a job at fry’s electronics

Helper626 11 #
An Unknown Location | 4 weeks ago (2 days, 12 hours after post)

My name is Eric. what would you like to talk about my friend?

jromerog 0 #
An Unknown Location | 4 weeks ago (2 days, 12 hours after post)

I don’t know I feel lost. And I’m confused I mean you put our heart and trust in some one and the time you spent with them didn’t mean a thing to them. I have always been there for them when they need someone and I had one mistake and they walk away…

Help me with: How do I get a job at fry’s electronics

Helper626 11 #
An Unknown Location | 4 weeks ago (2 days, 12 hours after post)

Forgive me but they do not sound like true friends. If you are still on your path that you want to be on there is no reason to feel lost. Everything will work out as long as you remain yourself. One door closes another needs to be opened. Have you tried apologizing for the mistake? even if there is nothing to apoligize for. Some people are just babies and want their own way and put up a fit when they don’t get their way.

jromerog 0 #
An Unknown Location | 4 weeks ago (2 days, 13 hours after post)

Yes I did and the answer I got from her was why did I past her problems on to her….” I said sorry and everything, and she said that I was different and missed the old me…..
Last thing she said was She doesnt have need to communicate with me anymore. And doesn’t want understand anything

Help me with: How do I get a job at fry’s electronics

Helper626 11 #
An Unknown Location | 4 weeks ago (2 days, 13 hours after post)

Sounds like the door closed in front of you. Perhaps another needs to be opened my friend. Seek new friends that have the same interest as yourself. She doesn’t want to communicate cause she doesn’t understand where your going and why your going. But as long as you know where your going andf why your going friends will come natural.

jromerog 0 #
An Unknown Location | 4 weeks ago (2 days, 13 hours after post)

Ya I know the door has closed… But my heart is still attached…. How can I move on??

Help me with: How do I get a job at fry’s electronics

Helper626 11 #
An Unknown Location | 3 weeks, 6 days ago (2 days, 21 hours after post)

throw yourself into school or work to get your mind off of things.
try finding a couple of new friends that have the same interest as you.
its hard to let go of friends that you care so much about especially for so long but give it sometime it will pass.
try to think how quickly they abondoned you for one simple mistake but yet when they make numerous your still there for them. A good friend could forgive a friend for just about anything. this merely proved their level of friendship to you.

forgive my delay in response had to attend work.

jromerog 0 #
An Unknown Location | 3 weeks, 6 days ago (3 days, 10 hours after post)

It’s alright thank you for helping me Eric. I understand what I must do but if she ever came back looking for my hand I would give it to her but I wouldn’t trust her. I will always be there because I promised her and I don’t break my promises it’s just who I am. but trust her again will be unlikely. Thank you friend I pray to that all goes well for you to. And I will be here for you as you have done for me

Help me with: How do I get a job at fry’s electronics

Helper626 11 #
An Unknown Location | 3 weeks, 5 days ago (3 days, 21 hours after post)

Your are quite welcome my friend. Just as a true friend should. Forgive me if i ever said other wise. still be the best friend you can be when she needs it like always have been and will be. thank you all i need prayer for is that i find at least one person to help everyday. honest thats all i truely desire. Anyways you know my name add to to your friends list or how ever it works on here any time you just want to send a line i check it everyday.

jromerog 0 #
An Unknown Location | 3 weeks, 5 days ago (4 days after post)

Thank you very much. It’s very hard people like you. That people think the same way. For me, my prayer help those people change to become better people and to open there mind and heart. You taut me very good leason that even though when some one is surround by darkness there is always the bright shinning light that guides you no matter how small it is, it’s hope:)

Help me with: How do I get a job at fry’s electronics

Helper626 11 #
An Unknown Location | 3 weeks, 5 days ago (4 days, 10 hours after post)

Indeed my friend. There is always hope never forget that.

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