Love help: i wrotew this for a girl thats realy specal to me..Opinons? - Help.com

i wrotew this for a girl thats realy specal to me..Opinons?

?

At Your Feet

Where are you tonight my love?
What is it that you do?
It’s true my heart is torn apart
When I’m not with you
What enchanted thoughts swim through your head?
Are any of them of me?
When, my dear, you go to bed
Is it my face you see?

Who is honoured with your presence now?
And do they even care?
The thought of you not being admired
Fills me with despair
Do they appreciate your loveliness?
Do they marvel at your splendor?
Do they love to hear your velvet voice?
Do they adore your smile so tender?

If they do not
Then they all are fools
and had you been with me
Every day, my love, you’d be a queen
because that’s what you are to me

I’m at your feet
and I come with gifts
my body, heart, and soul
They’re yours to do with as you please
to command and to control

I give myself with all my heart
I’m yours for all of time
Your slave, your king, your anything
only say that you are mine

This open post was written 1 month ago | V/U/S: 125, 7, 7 | Edit Post | Leave a reply | Report Post


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Since writing this post locjam may have helped people, but has not within the last 4 days. locjam is a verified member, has been around for 1 month and has 5 posts and 2 replies to their name.

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~LazyDaze~ offline Verified User (2 years, 5 months) Help.com Volunteer Moderator Long Term User Shouts: 434 #
An Undisclosed Location | 1 month ago (3 minutes after post)

That’s a really good poem but it sounds more like a wedding vow/words to me, something a husband would say to the bride in place or vows etc

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Coalesce offline Verified User (1 year, 2 months) Long Term User Shouts: 31 #
An Unknown Location | 1 month ago (3 minutes after post)

How well does she know you?

If you have been close friends/in a relationship for over a year I think it can pull off well.

If less than a year, I’d suggest skipping it, might come off a bit… compulsive.

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rosi3_lov3_2 offline Verified User (1 month, 1 week) Shouts: 0 #
An Unknown Location | 1 month ago (4 minutes after post)

aww thats soo cute
i loved it lol
did she like it??

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evansent:) offline Verified User (1 year, 8 months) Long Term User Shouts: 738 #
GB | 1 month ago (6 minutes after post)

that is so sweet!

such a gentleman :)

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J.N Location unknown offline Verified User (8 months, 3 weeks) Long Term User Shouts: 436 #
An Undisclosed Location | 1 month ago (6 minutes after post)

Its really sweet :)

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steff offline Verified User (1 year, 5 months) Long Term User Shouts: 236 #
An Unknown Location | 1 month ago (13 minutes after post)

I really like it, it even made me tear up a little because I wish a guy would write something that beautiful for me!

But maybe don’t give it to her unless you think a declaration of love would be well received and you’re already “in”. Hope it’s not some random girl who doesn’t know you very well.

But great job!

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littlemiss offline Verified User (2 weeks, 4 days) Shouts: 4 #
An Unknown Location | 2 weeks, 4 days ago (1 week, 4 days after post)

That is so beautiful !
Way to make a girl melt…

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