parents help: I have just done the most stupid thing…. - Help.com



This post left anonymously

I have just done the most stupid thing…

.

Basically….recently I’ve been under a hell of a lot of pressure (Im a 16 y/o/ girl) from mainly my parents. My mum constantly goes on about money, school etc and my dad just school and behaviour.
My dad is unemployed and over the past few years I have come to have little respect for him and the constant lectures (the whole ‘do as I say not as I do’ thing). I can’t stand him at the worst of times, and we rarely get on - the occasional joke or whatever. I feel guilty for not liking him sometimes. My mother has spent her life working and I probobly resent my dad because of the pressure he has put her under. I get mad at her for going on about how what she has spent money on for me is a waste. Sometimes I agree that ‘okay, mabye I didn’t need those lessons’ or whatever but I can’t get a job, what does she want me to do about it! I have like 1500 saved and I feel like just giving it to her - for 4 years I decided NOT to get b-day or xmas presents not because ‘I didn’t want anything’ but because I felt bad making her buy me things. I NEVER ask for money for clothes or music or anything like that -despite the way this has messed things up for me socially because I don’t dress like or have what the other girls have.
I don’t drink,smoke,do drugs or anything like that, have little or no confidence, low self esteem and I find it difficult to make friends (this is also targeted in those lectures). On top of that school this year is really hard and Im struggling to keep up, which sucks because this year because of state exams I was moved to a grind school (more money) and they hold this over my head.

20 mins ago, I went in a suddenly began to mention to my mum that I really don’t like my dad…and it turned into a rant and then an argument…one that upset her because she asked me what I wanted her to do about it - which I could only reply ‘nothing’ because thats the truth. She said I was being unfair to her - but I have just become so down over the past few days that I now feel awful for unloading onto her….what the hell should I do???

This open post was written 1 month ago | V/U/S: 91, 3, 2 | Edit Post | Leave a reply | Report Post


Reciprocity (0) Reciprocation Failure -- The poster has NOT helped anyone else yet!

Since writing this post Anonymous may have helped people, but has not within the last 4 days.

Post Tags (3)

parents, fighting, arguement (How Tags Affect Reciprocity)

Replies (3)

Where were you?

Click and drag to move the map around. FAQ: How we place people on this map »
You can also watch events on Help.com as they happen
Mouse over the map for 2 seconds to see an expanded, interactive view

beatricegalant offline Verified User (1 year, 4 months) Long Term User Shouts: 9 #
An Undisclosed Location | 1 month ago (12 minutes after post)

You don’t like your dad because he is unemployed and doesn’t give you money? I am sorry but you sound like a spoiled rotten kid if you say this. It is not your father’s fault that he is unemployed. It is very difficult to find jobs. Just love him and give him support. Is he abusing you or your mother? Is he alcoholic, or drug addict? Just because he is unable to find a job right now, he is not less of a person he was when he worked. You are unfair to him and to your mom. What should you do? Apologize and love your parents, unconditionally.

Quote this reply Report this reply to moderators
23523 offline Verified User (10 months, 3 weeks) Long Term User Shouts: 0 #
An Unknown Location | 1 month ago (1 hour, 39 minutes after post)

beatricegalant wrote:
You don’t like your dad because he is unemployed and doesn’t give you money? I am sorry but you sound like a spoiled rotten kid if you say this. It is not your father’s fault that he is unemployed. It is very difficult to find jobs. Just love him and give him support. Is he abusing you or your mother? Is he alcoholic, or drug addict? Just because he is unable to find a job right now, he is not less of a person he was when he worked. You are unfair to him and to your mom. What should you do? Apologize and love your parents, unconditionally.

Whoa…. love your parents unconditionally? I don’t agree with that. Some people haven’t done what they need to do as a parent to deserve unconditional love. If she’s asking for help on “help.com”, there is something wrong, and that needs to be addressed not repressed.

To the poster: to me you do not sound like a spoiled rotten kid. It sounds like you are handling things pretty well (as much as you can). You may not have nice clothes but your personality can make up for that. Remember to laugh.

Quote this reply Report this reply to moderators
Anonymous #
1 month ago (9 hours, 57 minutes after post)

beatricegalant wrote:
You don’t like your dad because he is unemployed and doesn’t give you money? I am sorry but you sound like a spoiled rotten kid if you say this. It is not your father’s fault that he is unemployed. It is very difficult to find jobs. Just love him and give him support. Is he abusing you or your mother? Is he alcoholic, or drug addict? Just because he is unable to find a job right now, he is not less of a person he was when he worked. You are unfair to him and to your mom. What should you do? Apologize and love your parents, unconditionally.

eh no - I don’t love him because he makes no effort to help her out and she is left doing everything while he does whatever he wants and spends the money she earns without thinking. He puts her under so much pressure and dosn’t realise it…I also said that I never asked for money….aside from that there are plenty of reasons I don’t like him. This is just annoying me.

Quote this reply Report this reply to moderators

Invite Others to Help

A logged in and verified Help.com member has the ability to setup a Friends List and invite others to help with posts.