Why do some people not look you in the eye? - Help.com

For some it is cultural - it is considered rude to look someone in the eyes.

For others it is anxiety. They are anxious around you and they are indicating their desire to run away from the anxiety.

i find if people stare too much it can be quite intimidating :/

yeah…they’re insecure.

some can be shy

I am diagnosed ADD, I try to keep eye contact but I am easily distracted. Hey! look a squirrel!

I do that sometimes.For me it’s because prolonged eye contact makes me uncomfortable.I don’t really know why.

for some it just doesn’t feel right. It’s an uncomfortable feeling for them

littlenick wrote:
Girls with big boobs get mad when you look at their chest and not look at them in the eyes.

They usually end up saying, “hey, my eyes are up here” while pointing at their eyes.

And I say, “yeah, but your big boobs are down there” while pointing at their chest.

and then I….er, I mean guys soon have an imprint of a high heel on their ballz.

littlenick wrote:
And then when girls check out the guys’ package instead of looking at them in the eye.

Isn’t that rude too?

lol, does that happen?

no, it’s a compliment in my opinion lol

I don’t look people in the eye because i’m afraid if they do they will think i like them and talk too much

actually i can’t look at people in the eyes period, i usually stare at something close to their eye

I’ve learned that it’s polite to look in the other person’s right eye.

when someone looks at me in the eye, i stare at the floor makes me extremely uncomfortable

ĐaNi HaŦeS ŸoŪ wrote:
I don’t look people in the eye because i’m afraid if they do they will think i like them and talk too much

Talk too much? Say stuff that doesn’t interest you? Or ask questions that make you uncomfortable?

Go ahead and grab the reins of the discussion and you can look them them in the eye, interrupt to say they’ve already told you that one, redirect a negative conversation with some positive possibility, transition a dull meandering into a focused look at details, get attention by laughing/frowning/looking off somewhere else like you have an important thought, or simply say you gotta go.

But to avoid and shut down interaction… you are depriving so many of your hidden talents and reinforcing yourself as a 2-dimensional character in everyone else’s world… they never get to see your depth.

What are you afraid of Dani?

linuxya wrote:

ĐaNi HaŦeS ŸoŪ wrote:
I don’t look people in the eye because i’m afraid if they do they will think i like them and talk too much

Talk too much? Say stuff that doesn’t interest you? Or ask questions that make you uncomfortable?

Go ahead and grab the reins of the discussion and you can look them them in the eye, interrupt to say they’ve already told you that one, redirect a negative conversation with some positive possibility, transition a dull meandering into a focused look at details, get attention by laughing/frowning/looking off somewhere else like you have an important thought, or simply say you gotta go.

But to avoid and shut down interaction… you are depriving so many of your hidden talents and reinforcing yourself as a 2-dimensional character in everyone else’s world… they never get to see your depth.

huh

steff wrote:
What are you afraid of Dani?

Nothing i just don’t like staring people in the eyes unless i like them

lol, it’s not really STARING, eye contact is just a normal part of communication

you know, i thought it was only me that doesnt like looking people in the eye

i didnt realise so many people felt the same :)

staring not staring i don’t like it when people look me in the eye unless i’m really close to them

ive been with my hubby for 25 yrs&sometimes i dont like looking him in the eye either
*weird*

strangely i can stare at a dogs eyes closely

I wonder if this is cultural…what countries are you guys from Dani, Mrs C, anyone else?

usa

me uk

ĐaNi HaŦeS ŸoŪ wrote:
strangely i can stare at a dogs eyes closely

ouch!thats not a very clever thing to do :/

well, there goes my cultural theory. lol

see I feel offended when I’m talking to someone and they’re not looking at me.

strangely so do i
but when they go to look back at me, i feel uneasy :/

like i say its weird

like they’re looking deep into your soul and can see all your secrets?!?! hehe

well they do say *your eyes are the windows of your soul*
ive got no secrets, therfore i dont see why im acting this way
stupid really lol!

steff wrote:

see I feel offended when I’m talking to someone and they’re not looking at me.

i look to people’s eyes when they talk but as soon as it is my turn to talk i look away and talk.. i live in UK ;)

i am insecure.. would love to be ’secure’ though :)

i’d say i’m overconfident.. but lack self-esteem badly. just recently realized there is a difference. and yes, you are right it does show assertiveness and security. i am aware that i need to practice, thank you. i’m trying to work on it.. just looking into your cute, littlenick, winking eyes, how do you like it? :)

I hate when people don’t look at me in the eye at least once during a conversation. I mean, how hard is it. I think it’s extremely rude to avoid eye contact completely when talking with someone. I tend to not bother with these types of people in real life.

I try too look everyone in the eyes when they are talking to me it shows you are paying attention to what the other person is saying and eye contact can also tell if a person is lying or not.

Sometimes it does feel a little odd if you look to long(stare)I turn away for a few seconds when they turn away , its normal for the person who is speaking to turn away for a bit so nothing wrong with you doing it too.

I think people who avoid eye contact are nervous and not comfortable around the person who is speaking. There are many reason why a person cant hold strong eye contact some lack nonverbal skills other might be shy or have autism ,Asperger’s syndrome,Social phobia or it maybe there culture.

Look up non verbal comunication there are many other things to do and ways to calm the person you are talking to.

what’s creepy about it?? it’s polite.

steff wrote:
what’s creepy about it?? it’s polite.

Are the eyes “Windows to the soul?” many people believe they are. Although the eyes are in fact highly fallible indicators of the inner world of others, they are not entirely devoid of information, particularly when the message they convey to others appears inconsistent with the individual’s facial expressions and verbal behaviour.

- The Stare Of The Psychopath - What Lies Behind Those Eyes?
http://masksofsanity.blogspot.com/200…

In the book Violent Attachments, women and men have noted the particular stare of the psychopath - it is an intense, relentless gaze that seems to preclude his destruction of his victim or target. Women, in particular, have reported this stare, which is related to the “predatorial” (reptilian) gaze; it is as if the psychopath is directing all of his intensity toward you through his eyes, a sensation that one woman reported as a feeling of “being eaten.” They tend to invade peoples’ space either by their sudden intrusions or intimidating look-overs (which some women confuse for sexuality.)

- THE PSYCHOPATH - The Mask of Sanity
http://www.cassiopaea.com/cassiopaea/…

..1 in 25 ordinary Americans secretly has no conscience and can do anything at all withou feeling guilty. Who is the devil you know?

- the sociopath next door, martha stout, ph.d.
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASI…

in Britain one person in 200 is likely to be a psychopath

- Psychopath
http://topdocumentaryfilms.com/psycho…

whoa…how random and creepy

creepy :/

ugly or not, you know people can still see you when you’re not looking at them, right?

it’s rude not to look at people when they’re talking to you!