SMiLe :) - Help.com

SMiLe :)

~The following are actual excerpts from classified sections of city newspapers.~

Illiterate? Write today for free help.

Auto Repair Service. Free pick-up and delivery. Try us once, you’ll never go anywhere again.

Our experienced Mom will care for your child. Fenced yard, meals, and smacks included.

Dog for sale: eats anything and is fond of children.

Man wanted to work in dynamite factory. Must be willing to travel.

Stock up and save. Limit: one.

Semi-Annual after-Christmas Sale.

3-year old teacher needed for pre-school. Experience preferred.

Mixing bowl set designed to please a cook with round bottom for efficient beating.

Girl wanted to assist magician in cutting-off-head illusion. Blue Cross and salary.

Dinner Special — Turkey $2.35; Chicken or Beef $2.25; Children $2.00

For sale: antique desk suitable for lady with thick legs and large drawers.

Now is your chance to have your ears pierced and get an extra pair to take home, too.

We do not tear your clothing with machinery. We do it carefully by hand.

Have several very old dresses from grandmother in beautiful condition.

Tired of cleaning yourself. Let me do it.

Vacation Special: have your home exterminated.

Get rid of aunts. Zap does the job in 24 hours.

Toaster: A gift that every member of the family appreciates. Automatically burns toast.

For Rent: 6-room hated apartment.

Man, honest. Will take anything.

Used Cars: Why go elsewhere to be cheated. Come here first.

Christmas tag-sale. Handmade gifts for the hard- to-find person.

Wanted: Hair cutter. Excellent growth potential.

Wanted. Man to take care of cow that does not smoke or drink.

Our bikinis are exciting. They are simply the tops.

Wanted. Widower with school age children requires person to assume general housekeeping duties. Must be capable of contributing to growth of family.

And now, the Superstore-unequaled in size, unmatched in variety, unrivaled inconvenience.

We will oil your sewing machine and adjust tension in your home for $1.00.

This open post was written 1 month, 1 week ago | V/U/S: 149, 8, 8 | Edit Post | Leave a reply | Report Post


Reciprocity (1) Many thank yous! The poster has helped others since their own post was made.

Since writing this post ~LazyDaze~ has helped in 1 other user's post within the last 4 days. ~LazyDaze~ is a verified member, has been around for 2 years, 6 months and has 37 posts and 16,606 replies to their name.

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Coalesce offline Verified User (1 year, 2 months) Long Term User Shouts: 31 #
An Unknown Location | 1 month, 1 week ago (4 minutes after post)

Nice… nice. :)

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steff offline Verified User (1 year, 6 months) Long Term User Shouts: 174 #
An Unknown Location | 1 month, 1 week ago (7 minutes after post)

These totally made me smile!

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Darth Pianoman~~~ offline Verified User (1 year) Long Term User Shouts: 152 #
An Unknown Location | 1 month, 1 week ago (20 minutes after post)

“vacation special, have your home exterminated” XD if you like these, go to engrish.com lol you’ll have loads of fun there

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steff offline Verified User (1 year, 6 months) Long Term User Shouts: 174 #
An Unknown Location | 1 month, 1 week ago (43 minutes after post)

pianoman roxas~~~ wrote:
“vacation special, have your home exterminated” XD if you like these, go to engrish.com lol you’ll have loads of fun there

man i just spent the past 22 minutes cracking up at engrish.com

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Miss Jessica Bunny offline Verified User (7 months, 2 weeks) Long Term User Shouts: 14 #
An Unknown Location | 1 month ago (12 hours, 30 minutes after post)

I lol’d.

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MortallyWounded offline Verified User (1 year, 3 months) Long Term User Shouts: 136 #
An Unknown Location | 1 month ago (17 hours, 32 minutes after post)

HAHA! Loved it!

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emmaphillips. offline Verified User (1 year, 1 month) Long Term User Shouts: 3 #
An Undisclosed Location | 1 month ago (1 day, 18 hours after post)

If i remember correctly. I think you helped me with a hair thing a while back because you were a hairdresser or something. Please could you help with my most recent post. About hair. Ta x

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cRazd&cOnfused offline Verified User (4 months, 1 week) Long Term User Shouts: 0 #
An Unknown Location | 1 month ago (3 days, 15 hours after post)

BAHAHA

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