Love help: Hey Im not normaly one to ask for relationship help for anything.

three_broken_leg

Hey Im not normaly one to ask for relationship help for anything.

But I’ve noticed im feeling allot more depressed lately and its down to a long distance relationship.
I usally dont do these, well.. Not at this sort of long distance. Im from the Uk, and she’s from Canada.

I’ve been speaking with her for over 5 years now and we do have allot in common, we make each other laugh and smile. And making me smile this much is a big acheivement for someone, to me.

I’ve recently gotten over the idea with trusting her enough that she DOES want to be with me. (She’s done allot to show it, sending me gift boxes in the post, wearing a t-shirt she brought me and sending it the box too), wrighting me poetry and txting me everyday.

Recently i’ve started to feel that im putting more effort into the “relationship” (i put ” because we arnt together yet in person) and im not getting much back.
For exsample, she tells me shes having a bad day, unlike her, so i rush back from a mates birthdayparty (he understood) and come online to chat and to be there for her.

And tonight i fell really down and lonely, i told her this, yet she doesnt txt me back much, and sort of avoids continuing to speak about how i feel. Im feeling like i’ve either put her off, or she is just not botherd to much by someone who isnt in the same country.
I am pretty worried in relationships and a tad paranoid, but i never let it get between us, or let her know, as to not worry her.

Now im just honestly worring for a reason, maybe i’ve put too much trust in her? Maybe im being pathetic by telling her my problems of feeling lonely? I am just so lost and really need someone to talk to or to help me out.
I apologize for the long post, its why im not good at talking about my problems, i explain things too much.
Thanks.

This open post was written 3 weeks, 4 days ago | V/U/S: 128, 15, 3 | Edit Post | Leave a reply | Report Post

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Since writing this post three_broken_leg may have helped people, but has not within the last 4 days. three_broken_leg is a verified member, has been around for 4 weeks and has 1 posts and 6 replies to their name.

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littlenick 134 #
An Undisclosed Location | 3 weeks, 4 days ago (3 minutes after post)

So you guys have never been together? Yet, you act like this already? I can only imagine if you guys were already together? You wouldn’t want to leave her at all. You would want to be with her 24/7. Maybe you guys should give each other a break? Or give each other some space for a while?

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three_broken_leg edited this post 3 weeks, 4 days ago. Read the previous text »

Hey
Im not normaly one to ask for help for anything. I’ve noticed im feeling allot more depressed lately and its down to a long distance relationship.
I usally dont do these, well.. Not at this sort of long distance. Im from the Uk, and she’s from Canada.

I’ve been speaking with her for over 5 years now and we do have allot in common, we make each other laugh and smile. And making me smile this much is a big acheivement for someone, to me.

I’ve recently gotten over the idea with trusting her enough that she DOES want to be with me. (She’s done allot to show it, sending me gift boxes in the post, wearing a t-shirt she brought me and sending it the box too), wrighting me poetry and txting me everyday.

Recently i’ve started to feel that im putting more effort into the “relationship” (i put ” because we arnt together yet in person) and im not getting much back.
For exsample, she tells me shes having a bad day, unlike her, so i rush back from a mates birthdayparty (he understood) and come online to chat and to be there for her.

And tonight i fell really down and lonely, i told her this, yet she doesnt txt me back much, and sort of avoids continuing to speak about how i feel. Im feeling like i’ve either put her off, or she is just not botherd to much by someone who isnt in the same country.
I am pretty worried in relationships and a tad paranoid, but i never let it get between us, or let her know, as to not worry her.

Now im just honestly worring for a reason, maybe i’ve put too much trust in her? Maybe im being pathetic by telling her my problems of feeling lonely? I am just so lost and really need someone to talk to or to help me out.
I apologize for the long post, its why im not good at talking about my problems, i explain things too much.
Thanks.

three_broken_leg 0 #
An Unknown Location | 3 weeks, 4 days ago (6 minutes after post)

We have allot of breaks from time to time, but when i dont message her after a day, she kinda makes me feel guilty.
And i would like to be with her 24/7, problem is, im going to join the RAF. So things will get worse before they get better.. Its so complicaited. This is why i’ve come here to ask for help.

I would never leave her, she means the world to me already.. And i feel stupid for saying that over someone i’ve never met.

littlenick 134 #
An Undisclosed Location | 3 weeks, 4 days ago (9 minutes after post)

She knows how to push your buttons to make you feel guilty yet she does not do the same for you.

You need to back off and she needs to stop making you feel guilty.

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three_broken_leg 0 #
An Unknown Location | 3 weeks, 4 days ago (12 minutes after post)

Its not as bad as it sounds really.
Its really more that i dont get the replys sooner than i’d like, and im not being impaitent.
Its like i’d speak to her, send her a message, wait about 6 minuites for a word back, and often its a very short reply..

I’m so lost on why she doesnt say much anymore. Some days we speak for hours, others i’ll be lucky if i get a reply every 10 minuites. I’m only online to speak to her, and only her, so she gets my full attension.
But it feels like i dont get the same back.

kanneybby 2 #
Sacramento, CA, US | 3 weeks, 4 days ago (15 minutes after post)

Well, I mean if she’s putting that much into you such as texting every day, sending you gifts, etc. She obviously has feelings toward you. Maybe she’s not good with helping others with emotions like that? You know what I mean. It could just be an awkward situation for her. Not everyone’s good at consoling someone. Just think about if you two switched spots. How would you react if she told you that she felt lonely … how would that make you feel or react?

And there’s nothing wrong with explaining things in depth. :)

Help me with: I’m not trying to be the gray storm cloud … but do you think the world will end in 2012?

three_broken_leg 0 #
An Unknown Location | 3 weeks, 4 days ago (19 minutes after post)

I try to see things in allot of points of view, probably why i get worried so much.
And if she felt lonely, i’d ask her how, and reasure her that i will always be here, i will never leave for another and i’d always put my time and effort into her problems..

God i think i just love too much and expect to be loved back the same way.. Allot of my relationships have ended like this. I try too much and scare the other away, i think.
Thank you so much to Littlenick and Kanneybby for replying to my problem, i really do apprecheiate anything anyone says.

littlenick 134 #
An Undisclosed Location | 3 weeks, 4 days ago (22 minutes after post)

I think you put too much effort into your relationship instead of just taking them in stride.

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three_broken_leg 0 #
An Unknown Location | 3 weeks, 4 days ago (25 minutes after post)

How do i take it in my stride? Do i just let problems pass without mentioning them?
Should i just let things continue to worry me without trying to fix them?

I dont understand, take them in my stide. Sorry, i tend to think extreamly openly about everything..

littlenick 134 #
An Undisclosed Location | 3 weeks, 4 days ago (27 minutes after post)

Meaning that like you said, when she texted you and you were at your friends party, you did not have to rush back to your place to talk to her. You could have told her, I will be done in a bit here and will call you when I get home.

I think when she says jump, you ask “how high?” You should not do that. That tends to become boring and it makes you look like a pushover.

(1)

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kanneybby 2 #
Sacramento, CA, US | 3 weeks, 4 days ago (27 minutes after post)

Yeah, I still just think that you two are just two different people. Everyone handles problems in a different way sometimes, or sometimes they just don’t know how to handle them. Even friendships can be that way. I had a friend I’d always go to for help when I was having a problem with whatever it was .. and she never knew how to help me. Like littlenick said … maybe you should work a bit on toning things down.

I mean, you care a lot .. and that’s a good thing and everything but she might not be use to all of that?

Help me with: I’m not trying to be the gray storm cloud … but do you think the world will end in 2012?

three_broken_leg 0 #
An Unknown Location | 3 weeks, 4 days ago (31 minutes after post)

I think you’re both right. Her past relationships, shes pretty much been used by boyfreind and she couldnt let go.

Yet im used to being on my own with things.

I will stick up on my point of the “I think when she says jump, you ask “how high?”” comment and say i do that because i do not want to loose her. I know that isnt much of an reason (/excuse maybe) but i dont have many ways of showing her how much i feel for her, so i do that.

But yeah.. I think i shouldnt mention my problems to her. I just dont have many freinds left because of a recent life style change, and have no one else to talk to. Hence why i came here to ask for help.

Thanks guys, really, thank you. I needed some advice and i beleive yours was the right advice. Thank you really.

kanneybby 2 #
Sacramento, CA, US | 3 weeks, 4 days ago (33 minutes after post)

I hope everything works out the way you want it to. :)
If not … then you can always come here for more help.

Help me with: I’m not trying to be the gray storm cloud … but do you think the world will end in 2012?

three_broken_leg 0 #
An Unknown Location | 3 weeks, 4 days ago (35 minutes after post)

Hehe, yeah.
I think of found my place to come for help, an outsiders view is worth its weight in gold i say.

littlenick 134 #
An Undisclosed Location | 3 weeks, 4 days ago (36 minutes after post)

Anytime mate! ;)

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