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My boyfriend says that I’m “the one.” He says he’s
so confident and he feels so safe and secure and lucky knowing he found his soul mate so early on in life. He says he knows there’s no one as perfect for him as I am, and the more people he meets, the more he’s sure of that. He says he’s never felt this way about anyone before. He says he wants to marry me some day. He wants to have children with me, to grow old with me. He wants me to be by his side for the rest of his life.
This doesn’t scare me, even though we’re only 19. I love that he says things like that. I hope all that comes true. I know that, even if we do get married, it’s not going to be any time soon because we’re both in college and we’re just too young right now. But, at this point, I’d love to spend the rest of my life with him.
The thing that scares me is… I love him more than life itself. I’d do absolutely anything for him. But I’m not as confident as he is. I’m not so sure there isn’t someone out there who would be better for me. He’s had a few other girlfriends before, but he’s my first boyfriend ever. I don’t have any previous relationships to compare this one to.
He’s so convinced, without a doubt. And I can’t help but doubt. Every time he says that there’s no one better suited for me than him, I flinch inside. I’m so conflicted. I don’t know how I should be feeling. I know I won’t have to worry about this for a while, but I’m not planning on breaking up with him any time soon, so I know I’ll have to deal with his proposal eventually…. I don’t know what to do.
I know that people are going to say, “You’re only 19; you don’t have to worry about this now! Just have fun and worry about it later.” But I DO have to worry about this now, because I need to decide if I’m going to continue to be with him, or try my luck with other guys. I don’t want to wonder my whole life if there wasn’t someone out there better for me. And I don’t think that, just because I’m wondering this, that means I should break up with him. I just… I don’t know how to tell if he really is the one for me.
Since writing this post Anonymous may have helped people, but has not within the last 4 days.
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