life help: has anyone ever overcome being a perfectionist? - Help.com

write it just to get the structure of it down on paper. write parts and if you don’t like them, then you can go back and change bits.

Perfectionism = you don’t value something (or yourself or others) unless they meet your ideal. Perfectionism develops when you think that you will gain love/acceptance/acclaim for doing something PERFECT instead of just being yourself. Your parents may have been overly critical of others and so you naturally thought the only way to avoid being criticized and unloved is to not make mistakes.

Perfectionism is a mental filter you apply. The problem is while you judge yourself harshly you also tend to use that as an excuse to judge others. This can cause problems with having friendships and relationships. “hopeless romantics” are perfectionists in that they idealize romantic relationships and consider anything less than their ideal to be a failure.

The answer? Realize that perfectionism is your way of trying to gain acceptance, love, and respect. Realize that it leads to a lot of negative results. So start projecting yourself to others as a FLAWED HUMAN. That’s right. Joke about your flaws. Accept them and joke about them and work hard to actively accept other’s flaws. Celebrate achievements regardless of whether they are perfect or not. And be sure to celebrate OTHER’S achievements.

When you find yourself criticizing others, stop immediately. Instead search for something positive in what they’ve done. Seek to understand them as people instead of boiling everything down to whether or not they’ve done something perfectly. The more generous you are with others, the more generous you can be with yourself.

don’t show version 1 to anyone, or version 2-3 even
make it very short, just lay down the idea
get it done anyway, as quick as you can — then you’ll have something to work on
it’s simple to be a perfectionist when you have nothing. You escape from the unknown by knowing one thing — “well, at least I know I suck. I’m a perfectionist and I can’t write the novel.”

Search the web for videos of Jonas Gerard painting his pieces. It’s his words: “Give up results. Give up planning.” Just jump into the unknown and try to let it flow. You’ll probably find yourself unable to stop.