good start, writing it down.
we all make mistakes, but her not having a better way to handle pain than to cut is not your fault.
Does she lean on you at lot, and eventually you snapped?
No. It was something that I perceived as a challenge to my integrity as a person, and so reacted in a hurt manner. I realized I was in the wrong, but it was too late.
Did you physically lash out? Sounds like have done everything you can to say sorry, she’s just fragile?
Demons in the dark. Laughing in the night. You may think you’ve beat them in the light, but they’re just waiting. Either you both seek Truth and live forever or you both die alone. Learn to Love yourself and then your own love will grow out and heal the lonely soul.
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I did not physically lash out at her.
Please don’t quote things like that at me. That demeans the love I do feel for her. The hate I feel for myself stems from my own actions against her, deplorable through the fact that I love her.
Anahid wrote:
I did not physically lash out at her.
Please don’t quote things like that at me. That demeans the love I do feel for her. The hate I feel for myself stems from my own actions against her, deplorable through the fact that I love her.
was that in reference to my two questions?
First was directed to you. Second to Lepore. I am not certain what to say regarding your second question. She is very sensitive and fragile - all the more reason to be so angry and hateful toward myself for hurting her. Her being sensitive is something I know and should have considered.
you’re not super human. You care about her, and upset you hurt her.
Yes. Exactly. I still hate myself for it. That’s part of me being upset. She had a /nervous breakdown/ because of me - I think I’m perfectly justified in hating myself.
Anonymous
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3 years, 1 month ago (5 hours, 40 minutes after post)
Put your energy into making things right, not hating yourself. That won’t help anyone. What you’ve written so far shows remorse ant that you do have a heart, so should at least be somewhat ok with yourself as a person
Anahid wrote:
She’s cutting herself because of how much pain she’s still in
Stop giving her excuses for her self-injury addiction. She needs serious therapy/counseling. You are not her ’cause’ or her ‘cure’. By taking the blame for her cutting, you are giving her permission to go ahead and injure herself every time she is upset with you. How convenient for her. Stop that!
Hating yourself isn’t useful. People make mistakes. Living in this world is hard and its hard to know the affect we have on people.
I’m an agnostic, but It seems like the love that you can find in a Christian community might be very healing for both of you. Maybe look for a Unitarian Universalist Church, even just to talk with some people?
dont hate yourself at all, she needs comfort and support from you to help her get over her problems that deep down may not actualy be about you but about her, dont feel sorry for yourself because you are obviosly a caring person just try to be there for her and show her yu care.
she hates me i dont know the reason
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My boyfriend hurt me in a way that caused so much pain and I also had a nervous breakdown, which I pretty much managed to hide from everyone. I wanted to kill myself and still sometimes do, but I know I will feel better someday- i hope. It has been a few months now and I cut myself because it really helps with the pain. Whatever happened with you and this girl? My ex wont even communicate with me, even though I did nothing to him. I wish he was regrtful like you but he is a cruel monster.
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