When can you tell your boyfriend that you love him?
Like how long should you be dating before you say it? I don’t want to sound childish…but really…this guy is the man of my dreams…we’ve known each other for 16 years but we didn’t start dating until recently…we were just re-united…I know we both feel it, but when can I say it? and how should I say it?
Since writing this post matty01 may have helped people, but has not within the last 4 days. matty01 is a verified member, has been around for 7 years, 3 months and has 8 posts and 30 replies to their name.
It does not depend on the amount of time you have been dating as much as how the time was spent between the two of you. Were you both getting to know about each other. Do you share the same philosophy’s on life, marriage, children, career choices, vacation destinations, choice of friends, hobbies, religios viewpoints, personal quirks, personal hygiene habits, financial goals, etc. Love is not word to be thrown around loosely.
We share a lot of the same philosphy’s…we have many similiar hobbies and interests but we have different ones as well. We have gone through some similiar trials in our pasts such as dealing with depression and such. I feel that there is a reason for meeting everyone…in the last two years I have gone through a lot of things that have taught me a lot about life and myself. I also learned that I always get stuck with these mean guys that end up treating me like I am their possession, not someone they care about. I believe that in a relationship the 2 do not need to have the exact same opinions or views but they need to respect each others opinions. I think that we have been put into each others lives for a very important reason. A few months ago I told my mother that I needed to find a guy that was more like me, rather than opposite me (like most of the men I have dated) I said I need someone who loves music, who likes to run, who is goofy, weird and full of s!%t just like me; but I also wanted them to care about me…then, this guy, my guy just so happens to come back into my life! (it really was weird how it happened! but it did and its awesome) Anyway, I love him, I know I love him because he is exactly what I have wanted for many years…and I know that love is not a word that should be thrown around, that is why I’m asking! (PS his mom was just diagnosed w/ cancer and he is so afraid, he shares his thoughts and emotions with me and when his eyes are welling up with tears all I want to do is tell him that I love him and that I am going to be here for him while she gets through this. I’ve said that I was going to be here for him but I haven’t told him that I love him.)
I think you shouldnt say it at all..it just complicates things..especially if he doesn’t realise he loves you too..showing your love is a better idea
Nicole, we would like to be the first to officially validate the growth in you that you have accomplished. The fact that you used your post divorce period to reassess you, your husband, the relationship and what type of men you were drawing into your lifetime was a wonderful lesson learning expedition. Very few take this time in their lives to use it constructively. Your reward is that you now view life through different eyes. You will be less likely in the future to bring in a man that views you as a possession. Congrats to you! Now, that being said, how does the kid feel? What’s your mom think? Is the boyfriend acting like he loves you? How? Googly eyes, lots of touchy, snugly(not sex but not no sex), want to be with each other all the time, actions toward your child, and like you said acting like he cares about you.
When we got together we didn’t realise what kind of ride we had bought tickets for. In three years time we have lost a brother, two friends and two mothers. We have gone through three bouts with hospitals concerning one of us. We can’t imagine what it would have been like without each other to lean on. Our paths crossing was not a coincidence. Looking back so many factors came into play for us to be together. Who are we to argue?
I do feel like I have learned a lot actually so much that I feel like a very different person! My son, he seems to like him…he has his little jealousy spells, I’m sure its from having his mom to just him for most of his life! He talks about him when he isn’t here, he says that he (boyfriend) is his friend! My mom, she loves him! Its funny because she always tells me how much she likes him and she asks about him all the time. She even has 3 different nick names for him. Is he acting like he loves me, yeah he is…he sent me a text message last night that said, “it may not mean much, but I think the world of you. You are such an amazing wonderful person and I’m very lucky to have you in my life.” What do you think of that? He always hugs me and looks in me in the eyes and gives me kisses. He says that its the best feeling when he sleeps with me (not sex, just sleeping) because he feels comfortable and at ease. He says it feels like its supposed to be, and that I fit perfectly next to him. Is all this gushing making you sick? I hope not! He helps me with my child in ways. He doesn’t have any kids so I’m sure he feels a little “out of sorts” but he does good. He has done some really nice things for me too, like running all over town to get my tires on my car fixed and replaced…(while he should have been in bed sleeping) I thought it was one of the nicest things that anyone has done for me in a long long time…You say that it wasn’t a coincidence for you two to have crossed paths…I don’t think it is a coincidence for us either, I think God put us in each others lives for a reason…so, what are your thoughts? I like you…you give a lot of information and ask a lot of questions to figure out the “whole” story of what is going on! You two are great!
Nicole, try some different words and resubmit your response. Would love to talk to you.
I do feel like I have learned a lot actually so much that I feel like a very different person! My son, he seems to like him…he has his little jealousy spells, I’m sure its from having his mom to just him for most of his life! He talks about him when he isn’t here, he says that he (boyfriend) is his friend! My mom, she loves him! Its funny because she always tells me how much she likes him and she asks about him all the time. She even has 3 different nick names for him. Is he acting like he loves me, yeah he is…he sent me a text message last night that said, “it may not mean much, but I think the world of you. You are such an amazing wonderful person and I’m very lucky to have you in my life.” What do you think of that? He always hugs me and looks in me in the eyes and gives me kisses. He says that its the best feeling when he sleeps with me (not s3x, just sleeping) because he feels comfortable and at ease. He says it feels like its supposed to be, and that I fit perfectly next to him. Is all this gushing making you sick? I hope not! He helps me with my child in ways. He doesn’t have any kids so I’m sure he feels a little “out of sorts” but he does good. He has done some really nice things for me too, like running all over town to get my tires on my car fixed and replaced…(while he should have been in bed sleeping) I thought it was one of the nicest things that anyone has done for me in a long long time…You say that it wasn’t a coincidence for you two to have crossed paths…I don’t think it is a coincidence for us either, I think God put us in each others lives for a reason…so, what are your thoughts? I like you…you give a lot of information and ask a lot of questions to figure out the “whole” story of what is going on! You two are great!
Nicky, what are you waiting for? He sounds like a wonderful guy. Has he expressed any plans for your future together? Given you any indication at all of thinking past the present? Have you discussed if he is looking for and ready for a life long commitment?
Well we haven’t been together that long. He did say one day that there are so many things he wants to say to me but he didn’t want to “freak” me out…we were in the car one day and he got all quiet…I asked him what he was thinking about and he said, (generally speaking) “being married and having a family and kids, oh I want that so bad…” I just looked at him and smiled, I didn’t really know how to respond… He is at work right now…he works 9pm-7am, my son and I went to work at 8 and put soup, juice, Hershey’s Kissables and gum in his desk cupboard…so when he got to work he would have a little surprise, midnight snack! He just sent me a message and said, “you are so sweet, what would I do without you?” Okay so I WANT to tell him, this last weekend I told him “I am going to love you, you know…” he got a big smile on his face, it was so cute! Anyway, I want to tell him but I don’t want to “freak” him out…(I don’t think it will but I don’t want him to feel awkward or like its too soon to know that)
Ask him what he wanted to tell you that he thought would freak you out. Sounds like he is ready but afraid of freaking you out and you are ready but afraid of freaking him out. Also, pick his brain about wanting to be married so bad. Ask him if he happened to have anyone in particular in mind. If not, you would be very happy to volunteer for that position. You could also make a copy of this post and accidentally leave it out in the open and then when he comes over you can suddenly have to spend an excessive amount of time in the bathroom or something. Anything sound good to you?
I could ask him what he wanted to tell me…that would be a good place to start! Ha ha ha! I love it but I don’t think I have that much courage to just leave this out! :) I will try asking him about it tomorrow and I will keep you posted! Thank you so much! I really appreciate all of your advice and thoughts! What is it about talking to complete strangers!?!? I get this strength that I don’t think I normally have, like “okay, I can do this…my friends on help.com have given me their thoughts and opinions, etc. Now its time to do it!” Anyway thank you so much, I will let you know tomorrow what happens!
God bless. Though we are faceless we are not voiceless. It comes through the computer some how. We feel as if we put our arm around your shoulder and had a heart to heart. Strange, do you feel that way? Yes, we let our guts hang out but we don’t think to complete strangers. We might know more about these faceless people than our own families. And yes, let us know what happens.
I let a whole month go by before i told my boyfriend i loved him but whenever i would say i he would say “u too” so i stopped then a couple weeks later he said it to me so just give it some time he’ll come around if he really does love you!
I meant my boyfriend last year my freshman year in highschool. We didn’t know eachother first semester but second semester is when we met.We became friends and then we stopped talking because I felt like he was attracted to my cousin instead of me. That hurt cause I really felt something between us. We finally got together over the summer. I told him I loved him on the first night we got together. I felt that way so I said it. He was my first. The first boy to never hurt me. I feel so beautiful because of him and loved. We’ve broken up twice and I don’t want that to happen anymore. I love him with all of my heart. He’s my best friend. Yea we’re young but so. This is right. How can I tell him that. He tells me all the time.
when u stare into his eyes and the only words that will come out is i love you, then its time and if he feels the same way he will say it back… if not at least he knows how you feel about him.
When I first said’I love u’ to my boyfriend he said it back but i didn’t feel like he meant it.So i stopped saying it. Then about a week later he said and that was when i knew he really loved me and meant what he said.He will say it when he knows for sure that he loves u and wants to be with u!!
Is it wrong for a 17yr old girl to go out with a 14 yrold boy?
i think telling your boyfriend you love him is something you have to depend on. what if his reaction is i love you to. then you think thats good but what if you say i love you and he doesnt replie and maybe not replaying is a good thing cause hes to shy. if it feels write in your heart then you know the thing to do. and all these things people are saying you should do you should let yourself choose
i need help me an my boyfriend been arguin alot latley about other girls that he is friends with an it worries me because i love him we been together for almost 5 months an i love him more than anything what should i do an how do i know if he is cheating on me with one of his supposivley friends?
Well, if u say it in the realationship “early”, it might look as though u dont really mean it u just want him for body desires but if u take time to find out his likes, dislikes, habits, among others and u realise that this is the guy for u and he realises that u like him a lot and he observes it by hints u gave him then i think it would be time enough to tell them “i love you” then it would look sincere and that u mean it.
I think you should tell your boyfriend you love him if that’s what you feel. Love happens at random moments. It could take 5 years to fall in love with someone, or two months. It just depends on how your relationship is. I think that you should tell him you love him if it’s what you feel. What have you got to loose?
After dating a boy for about a month we were sitting on a park bench and talking. There was a long pause and we were both thinking about eachother. “I love how I can say anything to you” he said to me. Alls I could think of was I love you but I didn’t say it. I leaned in and kissed him and it was amazing. “I can think of one thing you can’t say to me.” I said “what” he asked and I shook my head no. How many letters? He asked me and I said 8 and he said well it’s true. Amanda Ashley Psaros I love you more than anything in the world and there’s nothing you could ever do to stop that! I couldn’t speak but thererealy wasn’t time wasn’t time anyway cuz he immediatly made out with me. After I just hugged him and whispered I love you too. It was one of the best moments of my life.
you are all losers.. get a life…
i need help cuz me n ma ex boyfren love each other but wanna be frens wit benefits and yea but i totally disagree with that n he sed thats all we gunna be then cuz wen we date we dnt do nothing but wen we dnt date we do things together and it makes no sense at all so i need ur help???? please sincerly KIKI
me and Alan have been dating for 2 weeks
im with this one guy that iv only know for 5 days but theres something about him..its just you can ne ver find and ..i love him and i want to tell him but im afrade he is gonna freak out.,.or not say it back…idk wat to do..?
I’m only 9 and I do not know how to tell my boyfriend (cameron)that i love him, can you help me??
idk if i should tell him i love him or not but i kinda do we have been together 6 weeks. is it to early?
Love is a pure feeling love should not always be physical, u can love the person like that
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