This post left anonymously
Since writing this post Anonymous may have helped people, but has not within the last 4 days.
Post Tags (0)
This post has no tags. Please, help out and add some! (How Tags Affect Reciprocity)
the problem is finding the right balence between looking out for yourself and looking out for others
it depends; selfish people often find it more difficult to form relationships which can affect your life personally and professionally. friendships, romantic relationships and professional relationships are based on trust, when someone is seen to act selfishly it undermines that trust. this usually means that although people may like the person concerned, they are less likely to invest deeply in the relationship.
as a result, many exceptionally selfish people (in my experience) complain of feeling excluded, iscolated or generally overlooked.
however, that depends on how sociable they are. some people either don’t care about the negatives, or don’t notice (selfishness often goes hand in hand with narcisism or arrogance, another reason why selfishness is seen as a bad attribute), or are never exposed to the negative sides because they associate with similar, selfish people.
at the end of the day, everyone is slightly selfish, but if you are too selfish you lose the ability to depend on people, because they stop depending on you. this means when things do go wrong (as they do for everyone at some point) you may find you have no-one to turn to.
It seems like you aren’t a selfish person and someone has persuaded you that you are. When you act selfish, you usually make others disappointed. And when you are capable of asking yourself a question “What’s So Bad About Being Selfish?” it seems like you’re also capable of noticing disappointment in others. Therefore you’d be aware you did something really bad.
The conclusion is: If you really were a selfish person, you’d never ask that question.
Maybe I’m wrong, but maybe not!
Great reply Jubilee… just to reiterate; we all can be selfish. Usually it’s a trait that is relegated to our unconscious shadow, because as you your post implies most of us have been taught from a very early age, to be selfish is wrong/bad. To be selfish has a power and gift (just like all of our shadow) and should be recognized by everyone, and even used when necessary.
it can be you have to be able to recognize that your actions or lack of there of can impact people. the foot prints of our entire lives can be traced on how you impact other people.
I think narcissism is the worst trait in people, we are made to be with other people, and to relate not only our own experiences but to listen to and and appreciate the lives of others around us.
Having life be all about you is boring and small minded, there is a whole world out there of experiences that you will miss because of it. I don’t want to waste my time on people who are so selfish, they make horrible friends, and worse lovers.
Everyone should have some healthy amount of self confidence and such, but when the world is centered around you it becomes mighty small indeed.
It seems to me like getting stuck at the lower stages of development..
everyone is selfish.
its just human nature. cant really judge who is selfish or not.
even at times when we have the urge to help ppl,it could be that our main objective was to achieve a sense of self satisfaction that uve helped others,that ure helpful. etc.
bottomline: its always ourselves we think about.
^i agree, all of our actions stem from self-satisfaction, there are just greater degrees of selfishness and types of selfishness that benefit others.
always nice to see a mild outbreak of nihilism :p
Anonymous closed this post.
This post has been closed, no more replies. Thanks!
Invite Others to Help
Seeing as this post is closed, no invites are allowed.