This post left anonymously
I can’t stand myself, and life in general.
The more I live, the more I want to kill myself. Let’s face it: life is pointless. We live, stuff happens, then we die. It’s just a bunch of stress for no cause at all. That, and I’m tired of trying to please everyone. My entire life I focused around others, since I’m too shy to ever stand up for myself. I’m tired of constantly trying to please everyone, but for some reason I can’t let myself disappoint a single person. I guess I try to please everyone else because I can’t stand myself. I hate the way I look, and the fact that I happen to be gay. I’m 18 years old and a senior in high school, and I’ve been attracted to other men since I was 11. I can’t help it. No matter how hard I try to stop, I can’t stop liking other guys. I just can’t accept who I am. No one at all knows about this, as long as I’ve been gay. I want to date others, and be myself, but I;m too afraid of the consequences. My best friend since elementary school happens to be a complete homophobe, and openly bashes gays. My parents as well are against who I am. I can’t come out at all. I’m tired of being quiet and putting others before me, but I can’t just stop. I want to die.
Since writing this post Anonymous may have helped people, but has not within the last 4 days.
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