Two guys, one girl, at the same work.
Is this messed up or not?
OK, I have asked this question to a couple of people in person, and the response varies. So here’s the back ground.
I’m an IT professional in my early 30’s and have been seeing a girl in our office for over 18 months. It was a relationship, met family, friends, told each other the L word etc. A couple months ago, she started pulling away from me big time after I went away on a trip. I mean we only saw each other 4-5 times in 6 weeks and that was all on her. She has depression and anxiety issues, which she has been having therapy for for a while and she seems to be doing well. The whole time we have been together, I have been trying to help her with these issues.
In any case, after the constant pushing away, I confronted her a few times, which always ended not so great. She has a great difficulting talking about it. I ended up telling her that this is going no where for me, and the choices over me only make her issues worse. She needs time to herself. It hurt, both of us. She had a breakdown at work afterwards and was comforted by the boss. (Our employers know we were a couple). We never became nasty, we kept in touch for a short while until I told her it was having an affect on me. (she was texting me self-harm stuff, and it was hard since she won’t let me be there for her)
We work in a small company. 12 odd staff. I am suspecting that she has started seeing another guy (similar age) from the same office. I have my reasons for suspecting this, and I won’t go into those. But I really feel pretty betrayed if it turns out to be true. And I figured that it would be a rather silly idea for her to do so professionally considering our employers know about our history (and how long).
How messed up is this situation really in your opinion? Especially considering the boss knows about us?
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