wondering help: What is verbal abuse? - Help.com

See:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Verbal_a…

Verbal abuse is defined differently in different circumstances. Abuse usually occurs when there is a power difference between two people: “Abuse is an attempt to control the behaviour of another person. It is a misuse of power which uses the bonds of intimacy, trust and dependency to make the victim vulnerable.”

Verbal:
threats, insults, name-calling, unjust blaming and accusing, swearing, shouting

Psychological/Emotional:
withholding love, sympathy or understanding, inadequate physical or emotional care, isolation, intimidation, extreme jealousy, destroying property, threatening to commit suicide

In a parent-child relationship, it can be sometimes difficult to understand verbal abuse because it’s wrapped up in strong ties. There were certainly times in my childhood-adulthood where my mom was *acting* in an abusive manner, but her intent was not to be so. Legally and ethically, intent has nothing to do with abuse. If your mother is saying things that make you feel unsafe or unworthy of love that is abusive behaviour. But parents aren’t perfect, sometimes it’s important to let them know how their words make you feel. They should be respectful to you and visa versa.

Hope that helped.

I read your previous post. I guess things haven’t improved at all. Did you have that talk with your Mom?

I’m not trying to make excuses for her behavior but there might be contributing factors to her outbursts. I hope you can convince her to see a doctor for a good medical evaluation. She should be honest about her lack of control. Maybe your Dad would be the best one to approach her about it and to encourage her to make a doctor’s appointment.