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Well. It sounds like you aren’t comfortable with the idea of her staying with you. Quite frankly, even though her boyfriends apartment is small she should be staying there no excuses. If he has a room, she should be able to stay in his room with the baby. I once knew a group of people who had babies. There were 4 couples all with babies living in a 2 room appartment. They did this because it was either that, or live on the streets. Sometimes when you’re a parent, you do what you have to do in the short term.

It sounds like you are uncomfortable with the idea of her staying with you. How good of friends are you?

A-Cortex wrote:
Well. It sounds like you aren’t comfortable with the idea of her staying with you. Quite frankly, even though her boyfriends apartment is small she should be staying there no excuses. If he has a room, she should be able to stay in his room with the baby. I once knew a group of people who had babies. There were 4 couples all with babies living in a 2 room appartment. They did this because it was either that, or live on the streets. Sometimes when you’re a parent, you do what you have to do in the short term.

It sounds like you are uncomfortable with the idea of her staying with you. How good of friends are you?

We are not good friends,at school we use to talk..just hey How are you ..and bye thats all..
and where she see me,she stop and say Hello,how are you,and bye.

to be honest,i have a big appartment and only me and my hubby and a pet lives in it..
but we are trying to get me preg..
i dont want to things between me and my hubby goes wrong i want to keep living this way..happy and do what every i want in my appartment..

her man work,and i was asking my self why he dont rent a app..and she will go livin there..
but her baby is under single mother so she will took money.

thats why.

If she was one of your best friends, then yes. I would take her in. But being that you guys are aquaintances, I think it would be very unwise of you to let her stay with you. She will make your flat crowded and you will have no time to yourself because of the baby. She might even expect that you will be a “free” babysitter. Unless you know her well, I don’t suggest taking her in. Let her an her boyfriend figure it out.

Having them in your flat will effect you and your boyfriends relationship. Trust me. Don’t feel bad for turning her away. If she is contacting you, she will probably contact someone else who is also an aquaintance. Save yourself the grief and refuse.

A-Cortex wrote:
If she was one of your best friends, then yes. I would take her in. But being that you guys are aquaintances, I think it would be very unwise of you to let her stay with you. She will make your flat crowded and you will have no time to yourself because of the baby. She might even expect that you will be a “free” babysitter. Unless you know her well, I don’t suggest taking her in. Let her an her boyfriend figure it out.

Having them in your flat will effect you and your boyfriends relationship. Trust me. Don’t feel bad for turning her away. If she is contacting you, she will probably contact someone else who is also an aquaintance. Save yourself the grief and refuse.

Thanks no we was never good good friends,
she was working a striper but then she get preg..and leave work.etc..
shes still with her bf.
but i dont understand why she dont go and rent a property like i did.
I dont work..my hubby do.
and we rent a app.
we take care,of money and dont go to pubs etc..

and what about if i wil have my baby? or she will not give her a gov house.
she will stay here forver..=/

Trust you gut.

Don’t do it!
Don’t do it!
Don’t do it!
I can think of a million reasons. that’s my advice.

what i got?
i trust her. even my boyfriend.
but i dont want her to stay here forever,or to bring friend over here..or to be a free babysitter!

You know your answer. what else are you looking for? Don’t do it. It’s that simple.

A-Cortex wrote:
You know your answer. what else are you looking for? Don’t do it. It’s that simple.

thanks alot
and if she dont talk to me anymore?
is it my fault?

If she doesn’t talk to you anymore. . .why does it matter? If you only said hello, how are you, and goodbye. . .What is there to miss in “talking”?

It’s her problem if she decides not to talk to you. You can choose between her living with you, eating all your food, making you her babysister, having strangers over, having her at your house all the time, having a crying baby every day there, not being able to be comfortable in your own house and ect. .

OR

you can not talk.

I don’t know about you, but I pick the second one.

A-Cortex wrote:
If she doesn’t talk to you anymore. . .why does it matter? If you only said hello, how are you, and goodbye. . .What is there to miss in “talking”?

It’s her problem if she decides not to talk to you. You can choose between her living with you, eating all your food, making you her babysister, having strangers over, having her at your house all the time, having a crying baby every day there, not being able to be comfortable in your own house and ect. .

OR

you can not talk.

I don’t know about you, but I pick the second one.

thanks alot i will tell her that im not interst to keep her living at my house :)
then is up to her..

desertgalleon wrote:
DON’T DO IT!
DON’T DO IT!
DON’T DO IT!

I can think of a million reasons. That’s my advice.

what’s The reason please.
can you please open my eyes.dont let me blind..

summary: dont let her move in

first of all u really dont know her much… so clearly bringing a stranger to ur house is extreme stupid idea… if u think u know her , u really dont… there is more to ppl then what u hear about them or what u see… u really never come to realize a person until you live with them and see them everyday and every second… so clearly you have no clue what this girl is like and how is her bf…

second she is a stripper, now i dont know how much u trust ur bf and stuff… but brining a stripper to ur house, def not one of the smartest move i seen girls do… no offense to ur bf its not really hard to seduce a guy…

third bringing a third party between people that are trying to get pregnant , hmmm how to put it… annoying :P…”hey honey keep ur voice down ” :P …

forth about the suicide thingy, well its bullsh!t dont buy that crap its just a low way to make u agree which tells that the girl is ficked up :P

fifth she was never ur friend so u are not loosing her…

etc…

in conclusion: dont do it… dont ruin what u got

tricky wrote:
summary: dont let her move in

first of all u really dont know her much… so clearly bringing a stranger to ur house is extreme stupid idea… if u think u know her , u really dont… there is more to ppl then what u hear about them or what u see… u really never come to realize a person until you live with them and see them everyday and every second… so clearly you have no clue what this girl is like and how is her bf…

second she is a stripper, now i dont know how much u trust ur bf and stuff… but brining a stripper to ur house, def not one of the smartest move i seen girls do… no offense to ur bf its not really hard to seduce a guy…

third bringing a third party between people that are trying to get pregnant , hmmm how to put it… annoying :P…”hey honey keep ur voice down ” :P …

forth about the suicide thingy, well its bullsh!t dont buy that crap its just a low way to make u agree which tells that the girl is ficked up :P

fifth she was never ur friend so u are not loosing her…

etc…

in conclusion: dont do it… dont ruin what u got

Thanks very much Tricky.

Did you already forget how long you waited to have this peaceful apartment with your boyfriend? Did you forget how miserable you were and how desperate to have your own place in the world together? It wasn’t that long ago.

Don’t bring a stranger (yes, she IS like a stranger!) into your little paradise. Everything has been going so well for you, my friend. You are enjoying your new apartment and your privacy with your boyfriend. That will all be gone if she moves in. There will be no more peace.

Your boyfriend works hard to share his life with you. Her boyfriend can do the same for her. It’s not your responsibility to provide a room for her. You are a very sweet person and I think she’s playing on your sympathy. Don’t be fooled.

Your boyfriend is trying to warn you that your apartment won’t be the same if you let her live with you. Trust me - it’s not worth the extra money. In fact, if she has to pay you for a room, how can she save to move out? How much is peace and privacy worth to you?

Good luck with this. I’m hoping you are strong enough to say NO!

Kitten_Ciao wrote:
Did you already forget how long you waited to have this peaceful apartment with your boyfriend? Did you forget how miserable you were and how desperate to have your own place in the world together? It wasn’t that long ago.

Don’t bring a stranger (yes, she IS like a stranger!) into your little paradise. Everything has been going so well for you, my friend. You are enjoying your new apartment and your privacy with your boyfriend. That will all be gone if she moves in. There will be no more peace.

Your boyfriend works hard to share his life with you. Her boyfriend can do the same for her. It’s not your responsibility to provide a room for her. You are a very sweet person and I think she’s playing on your sympathy. Don’t be fooled.

Your boyfriend is trying to warn you that your apartment won’t be the same if you let her live with you. Trust me - it’s not worth the extra money. In fact, if she has to pay you for a room, how can she save to move out? How much is peace and privacy worth to you?

Good luck with this. I’m hoping you are strong enough to say NO!

thanks so much! i understand you!

You’re quite welcome. :)

Kitten_Ciao wrote:
You’re quite welcome. :)

Thanks Dear!

I agree with Kitten_Ciao.

Anonymous wrote:

desertgalleon wrote:
DON’T DO IT!
DON’T DO IT!
DON’T DO IT!

I can think of a million reasons. That’s my advice.

what’s The reason please.
can you please open my eyes.dont let me blind..

Well, I didn’t say A reason. I said many possible reasons. So, I won’t have to list them all like, crying baby, bf comming over & other friends, if drugs were brought into your unit who would be legally responsible, etc. etc. etc.

My point is that tragedy just may follow some people around, like an aura. Do you really want to screw up your feng-shui for no reason? Unless you think she has a really good memory and will someday be in a position to return the favor, I would say, why? You just can’t foresee the kinds of things that would happen that you would later regret. What will happen when her bf has no place to live, will he move in too? If she loses her bf? Starts bringing other guys home? Maybe I’m just a pessimist. But I don’t see what’s in it for you… Name one positive thing that could come out of it? Just one?

Anyway, it’s your decision. I would advise you not to though. If you care about your boyfriend and your happy relationship together.

“If it ain’t broke: don’t fix it”

desertgalleon wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

desertgalleon wrote:
DON’T DO IT!
DON’T DO IT!
DON’T DO IT!

I can think of a million reasons. That’s my advice.

what’s The reason please.
can you please open my eyes.dont let me blind..

Well, I didn’t say A reason. I said many possible reasons. So, I won’t have to list them all like, crying baby, bf comming over & other friends, if drugs were brought into your unit who would be legally responsible, etc. etc. etc.

My point is that tragedy just may follow some people around, like an aura. Do you really want to screw up your feng-shui for no reason? Unless you think she has a really good memory and will someday be in a position to return the favor, I would say, why? You just can’t foresee the kinds of things that would happen that you would later regret. What will happen when her bf has no place to live, will he move in too? If she loses her bf? Starts bringing other guys home? Maybe I’m just a pessimist. But I don’t see what’s in it for you… Name one positive thing that could come out of it? Just one?

Anyway, it’s your decision. I would advise you not to though. If you care about your boyfriend and your happy relationship together.

“If it ain’t broke: don’t fix it”

Thanks
yes,i understand Your Point,i just text her.that sorry not interest to share my house!

Good choice! Don’t give it a second thought. If you’re trying to make the world a better place, you can do that just doing some small deed here and there. Like make coffee for your boyfriend in the morning, or write a letter to a family member you haven’t talked to in a while.

Kitten_Ciao wrote:
Did you already forget how long you waited to have this peaceful apartment with your boyfriend? Did you forget how miserable you were and how desperate to have your own place in the world together? It wasn’t that long ago.

Don’t bring a stranger (yes, she IS like a stranger!) into your little paradise. Everything has been going so well for you, my friend. You are enjoying your new apartment and your privacy with your boyfriend. That will all be gone if she moves in. There will be no more peace.

Your boyfriend works hard to share his life with you. Her boyfriend can do the same for her. It’s not your responsibility to provide a room for her. You are a very sweet person and I think she’s playing on your sympathy. Don’t be fooled.

Your boyfriend is trying to warn you that your apartment won’t be the same if you let her live with you. Trust me - it’s not worth the extra money. In fact, if she has to pay you for a room, how can she save to move out? How much is peace and privacy worth to you?

Good luck with this. I’m hoping you are strong enough to say NO!

I love KC’s replies, she knows just what to say. ;)

desertgalleon wrote:
Good choice! Don’t give it a second thought. If you’re trying to make the world a better place, you can do that just doing some small deed here and there. Like make coffee for your boyfriend in the morning, or write a letter to a family member you haven’t talked to in a while.

Jackie O! wrote:

Kitten_Ciao wrote:
Did you already forget how long you waited to have this peaceful apartment with your boyfriend? Did you forget how miserable you were and how desperate to have your own place in the world together? It wasn’t that long ago.

Don’t bring a stranger (yes, she IS like a stranger!) into your little paradise. Everything has been going so well for you, my friend. You are enjoying your new apartment and your privacy with your boyfriend. That will all be gone if she moves in. There will be no more peace.

Your boyfriend works hard to share his life with you. Her boyfriend can do the same for her. It’s not your responsibility to provide a room for her. You are a very sweet person and I think she’s playing on your sympathy. Don’t be fooled.

Your boyfriend is trying to warn you that your apartment won’t be the same if you let her live with you. Trust me - it’s not worth the extra money. In fact, if she has to pay you for a room, how can she save to move out? How much is peace and privacy worth to you?

Good luck with this. I’m hoping you are strong enough to say NO!

I love KC’s replies, she knows just what to say. ;)

just text her sorry im not ready to share my house.
goodluck to fine someone who can.!
and hope the gov give you one fast!

i told her as well.does your bf? work?
if yes why he dont rent a small one?
at least you will have someone to live in..

and she didint respond me.
Only no i dont have uncles or cousin i can go live with and there’s no one else,accept my ofer!
and gov need to wait 2 years more..to give me the house!

If she has money to pay you rent, she has money to get a place of her own. If she has a baby with her b.f. she should have his money to support the baby too.

She first tried to figure out how big your house was -THEN she asks can she move in. If you let her…she may be there for a LONG time - because she has no plans to move until she gets a free/low cost house from government.

I know you have a tender heart - rescued stray puppy - but this lady is making bad decisions- she had a baby she can’t afford and does not have a steady job to take care of herself and her baby. She wants anyone else to take care of her.

Please learn how to say this….My answer is NO, i’m sorry, but it just won’t work for me. No explanations are necessary. If she refuses to talk to you after - she wasn’t really your friend.

Just wish her good luck and be firm! :) If she senses that you are feeling bad for her, she will keep trying to work on your sympathy. You don’t have to give any reason for not sharing your apartment with her. :)

If you feel you must do something to help her, you can advise her on where to search for her own apartment with her boyfriend. She can get a roommate to share an apartment with her if her boyfriend isn’t ready to live with her.

Kitten_Ciao wrote:
Just wish her good luck and be firm! :) If she senses that you are feeling bad for her, she will keep trying to work on your sympathy. You don’t have to give any reason for not sharing your apartment with her. :)

If you feel you must do something to help her, you can advise her on where to search for her own apartment with her boyfriend. She can get a roommate to share an apartment with her if her boyfriend isn’t ready to live with her.

Z-Anonymous wrote:
If she has money to pay you rent, she has money to get a place of her own. If she has a baby with her b.f. she should have his money to support the baby too.

She first tried to figure out how big your house was -THEN she asks can she move in. If you let her…she may be there for a LONG time - because she has no plans to move until she gets a free/low cost house from government.

I know you have a tender heart - rescued stray puppy - but this lady is making bad decisions- she had a baby she can’t afford and does not have a steady job to take care of herself and her baby. She wants anyone else to take care of her.

Please learn how to say this….My answer is NO, i’m sorry, but it just won’t work for me. No explanations are necessary. If she refuses to talk to you after - she wasn’t really your friend.

Thanks all she didnt reply back at all !
she dont want to get a job shes getting money from the goverment couse she’s having the baby under single mother!!

like everyone else said, don’t let her live with you. even though she’s a woman and has a child, it’s about as wise to let her in as it is to let in any random homeless person. someone like her who is desperate would be likely to be okay with stealing and come up with excuses after excuses not to leave.

you can tell her that you and your husband are trying to start a family and hubby says “no” to guests. maybe you could offer to help her find some really cheap apartments somewhere, if you wanted to try to do something nice for her, but stay firm when she pesters you about moving in.

Youcancallme0zy wrote:
like everyone else said, don’t let her live with you. even though she’s a woman and has a child, it’s about as wise to let her in as it is to let in any random homeless person. someone like her who is desperate would be likely to be okay with stealing and come up with excuses after excuses not to leave.

you can tell her that you and your husband are trying to start a family and hubby says “no” to guests. maybe you could offer to help her find some really cheap apartments somewhere, if you wanted to try to do something nice for her, but stay firm when she pesters you about moving in.

Thanks i offer her the most cheaperst appartment..
and she Says NO!
and didnt respond me anymore !

Cell wrote:
I wouldn’t like that arrangement. You need to decide what will work for you but it can be hard to get rid of someone once they have moved in.

yeah she told me i was going to make more than 2 years!!!

omg and first she told me a few days!

wow, good thing you didn’t let her in!

Two YEARS?! Wow, no one I know moves in with someone knowing they’ll be there for two years. A few weeks at most, maybe, until they get on their feet and are able to go on their way.

Sounds like she just wants to leech off your kindness, but you need to be concerned for YOUR family now - especially if you want a little one of your own around the house soon! :)

Youcancallme0zy wrote:
wow, good thing you didn’t let her in!

Thanks im proud of my self that i said NO ::)

Jackie O! wrote:
Two YEARS?! Wow, no one I know moves in with someone knowing they’ll be there for two years. A few weeks at most, maybe, until they get on their feet and are able to go on their way.

Sounds like she just wants to leech off your kindness, but you need to be concerned for YOUR family now - especially if you want a little one of your own around the house soon! :)

Thanks alot jackie..yeah that was she answer me two years and then she didnt send anymore..

Anon wrote:
Thanks im proud of my self that i said NO

I’m very, VERY proud of you!! I know it isn’t easy to say no sometimes. You have a good heart and I know you like to help people as much as possilbe. This is a very good lesson for you. Some people will take advantage IF they can. ;) No real friend would intrude into your life. Always do whatever you can to protect your own home and relationship. :)

Kitten_Ciao wrote:

Anon wrote:
Thanks im proud of my self that i said NO

I’m very, VERY proud of you!! I know it isn’t easy to say no sometimes. You have a good heart and I know you like to help people as much as possilbe. This is a very good lesson for you. Some people will take advantage IF they can. ;) No real friend would intrude into your life. Always do whatever you can to protect your own home and relationship. :)

Thanks dear :)