boyfriend help: I was molested as a young girl by one of my mom’s best friends sons. - Help.com

nope, don’t think you can handle all of that. more than that, you shouldn’t have to. i work nightshifts so i know how it is to sleep during the day. if he’s working the normal 8hr shift he has his 8 for sleeping and the other 8 go where? he has more than enough time to allow you a break from the kids at the least and then some. even if he’s doing 12hr shifts, he can manage some productive time. that being said, sry about what happened to you when you were younger and that you didn’t get the psychological help you needed(and still need probably). yet you have moved on with your life and are in a place where you have to put your family first. if you and your hubs are having communication issues or can’t seem to work stuff out then get help weather it be a marriage counselor or an organizer(for example), anything to facilitate your lives in order to give your kids the best atmosphere possible. good luck!

Maybe your husband is stressed too. Working nights is hard and having a stressed out spouse is also stressful.

The two of you need to calmly work out a plan that will be best for your children and for your marriage, maybe trade off a few hours of babysitting per week with a trusted friend or neighbor, though with your history I understand that it might be difficult to trust someone with your precious children. If you haven’t dealt with your traumatic past, you might want to talk with a counselor about that.

Taking care of children is hard work and an 18 hour per day job. If your family can afford it, look into one of you working fewer hours, or maybe you can take your classes on a part-time basis for a few years until the babies are older.

You are dealing with a lot, but things will be better if you just hang in there. Ask for help from family and friends.

Yep. Your husband’s “circadian rhythm” is all messed up. You’re NEVER 100 percent when you are working at night and sleeping in the day.

Be patient and ask him to diligently search for a first shift job. He just needs to tell the boss he has a young infant at home and another on the way, and he needs to get his schedule synchronized with that of his family.

You also need therapy, because you are going to be taking out things on your husband are not his fault. Read Joyce Meyer’s book, “Approval Addiction,” and see how she almost destroyed her marriage by constantly berating her husband because her FATHER molested her.

You DID have a child too early by TODAY’s standards, but girls 15 and 16 regularly became mothers in the earlier centuries.

Don’t beat up your husband. Don’t nag him. Just ask him nicely to do this or that. But realize that if he doesn’t get a full eight hours of sleep every day, he will feel like absolute crap. And that will imperil his ability to earn a living for his family.

DO get therapy . . . and WORK with your husband to help him get a more civilized work shift!