IDon'tEverQuit invited 15 users to read this post 1 year, 10 months ago.
IDon'tEverQuit invited 15 users to read this post 1 year, 10 months ago.
Your username is the only possible reply to ur problem .. just don’t quit .
And don’t take your baby as a financial burden may be it turns out to be
Good luck charm for you guys .. giving life to someone may give a reason
to you guys to work hard and achieve more . try finding some home jobs . They
Are plenty of them around . and have faith in your self and give yourself a
CHANCE .. you and your husband will surely find something worthwhile to overcome this .
Try and look for things you guys are best at . Then try finding a new job . your key skills are your own
nobody else have them . you while on maternity leave can give tutions to kids or open a play school for other
Kids . In this way you can probably learn and earn too ..
All the best and keel smiling . :)
ABHAY wrote:
Your username is the only possible reply to ur problem .. just don’t quit .
And don’t take your baby as a financial burden may be it turns out to be
Good luck charm for you guys .. giving life to someone may give a reason
to you guys to work hard and achieve more . try finding some home jobs . They
Are plenty of them around . and have faith in your self and give yourself a
CHANCE .. you and your husband will surely find something worthwhile to overcome this .
Try and look for things you guys are best at . Then try finding a new job . your key skills are your own
nobody else have them . you while on maternity leave can give tutions to kids or open a play school for other
Kids . In this way you can probably learn and earn too ..
All the best and keel smiling . :)
our baby would never be a burden :) we are crazy about this baby already. we love being pregnant! my hubby keeps saying that it will work out but time is getting less and less and nothing is being solved. need money to move and SOON and we need money for baby stuff :(
I would say that you could get some governmental help and support in Canada, no? Did you ever try?
And social organizations and churches?
Zirbel wrote:
I would say that you could get some governmental help and support in Canada, no? Did you ever try?
And social organizations and churches?
It could be a possibility (government i mean) BUT not until after baby. I will get maternity leave money for a little while but hubby doesn’t make even close to what we need…he’s trying so hard but nothing :(
Anonymous
#
1 year, 10 months ago (23 minutes after post)
Congratulations on getting pregnant! :)
The best financial advice I can give you is to make a budget and STICK to it.
I make $1,200 a month (working three part time jobs);
I have $3,000 of credit card debt;
I have $800 of bills a month (rent, water, electricity, etc.);
I need to spend $300 a month on gas, food, and other necessities.
So, every month I spend my paycheck as follows:
$800 = bills
$300 = gas, food, etc.
$80 = credit card payment (twice the minimum)
$20 = savings
Which means I’ll have the rest of my debt paid off in about 4 years, and I’ll have about $1,000 more in savings by that time. :)
It’s really hard to get ahead when your so far behind. But if you work hard to manage everything, you’ll get out of debt eventually. Children are expensive but you and your husband will be able to do it! Just make a plan and stick to it.
Remember there is always government aid for poor families. Food stamps, food banks, housing assistance, etc. all can make a big difference. Unfortunately I don’t qualify for any of that (because I’m still considered a “child” by the government) but as new parents, you will.
If your credit card payments are a large percentage of your wages, see if you can lower them (or take out a loan to pay it off). I took out a loan since my credit card interest rate is 17.99% and my bank’s interest rate is 6.5%.
To make more money, go to sign up for amazon turk (through amazon). They have a lot of “jobs” that take about 5 minutes and give you between $0.01 and $0.50 per job. (Stay away from ones that make you sign up for stuff, they are scams that got by amazon’s filters!) It’s not a lot of money, but it also doesn’t take a lot of time, and you can do it while surfing on the internet. I make an extra $100 or so a month doing it for a couple hours every night.
:) Good luck! Enjoy being a parent and don’t fret about expenses. Just make a good budget and stick to it! :)
IDon’tEverQuit wrote:
Zirbel wrote:
I would say that you could get some governmental help and support in Canada, no? Did you ever try?
And social organizations and churches?
It could be a possibility (government i mean) BUT not until after baby. I will get maternity leave money for a little while but hubby doesn’t make even close to what we need…he’s trying so hard but nothing :(
What about CAPSS:
“CAPSS under girds 71 affiliate centres, and is presently assisting with the growth and development of another nine centres. Located in towns and cities across Canada, these centres offer practical, material, emotional and spiritual assistance by helping women and their partners or significant other through distressing pregnancies.”
http://www.capss.com/
Your provincial and territorial government should also support you during pregnancy.
It’s written here: “Early Childhood Development”: http://www.socialunion.gc.ca/nca/supp…
I feel very sorry for your husband; you are treating him awfully. If you don’t love him, than you need to cut him loose and stop stringing him along while you wait for something better to come along. He is a Husband and a Father, he isn’t going to leave you while he still loves you and while he can still be those things, in some ways it would be wrong of him to do so. This is all you’re doing so you need to be the one to take charge and make the changes in both of your lives.
You tried to defend yourself with the line “I wasn’t some bored little wife who wanted cheat” in an attempt to use your sickness as excuse the things you have done and the way you have been acting. So it’s clear you know you have been treating your husband awfully; and if some “bored little wife” where doing these things you wouldn’t give her the same pass you are trying to give yourself. I would challenge your thinking on this point; I don’t think you should be using your past sickness to excuse your behavior. Maybe it was an excuse the first time you started talking to this other guy; but now it’s just a crutch and it is you who is behaving badly not your sickness from years ago.
It’s time for you’re to start making positive changes in your life. Stop talking to the ex, leave your husband completely and focus on yourself and being a good mom. Start taking charge and responsibilities for your actions.
Anonymous wrote:
Congratulations on getting pregnant! :)
The best financial advice I can give you is to make a budget and STICK to it.
I make $1,200 a month (working three part time jobs);
I have $3,000 of credit card debt;
I have $800 of bills a month (rent, water, electricity, etc.);
I need to spend $300 a month on gas, food, and other necessities.
So, every month I spend my paycheck as follows:
$800 = bills
$300 = gas, food, etc.
$80 = credit card payment (twice the minimum)
$20 = savings
Which means I’ll have the rest of my debt paid off in about 4 years, and I’ll have about $1,000 more in savings by that time. :)
It’s really hard to get ahead when your so far behind. But if you work hard to manage everything, you’ll get out of debt eventually. Children are expensive but you and your husband will be able to do it! Just make a plan and stick to it.
Remember there is always government aid for poor families. Food stamps, food banks, housing assistance, etc. all can make a big difference. Unfortunately I don’t qualify for any of that (because I’m still considered a “child” by the government) but as new parents, you will.
If your credit card payments are a large percentage of your wages, see if you can lower them (or take out a loan to pay it off). I took out a loan since my credit card interest rate is 17.99% and my bank’s interest rate is 6.5%.
To make more money, go to sign up for amazon turk (through amazon). They have a lot of “jobs” that take about 5 minutes and give you between $0.01 and $0.50 per job. (Stay away from ones that make you sign up for stuff, they are scams that got by amazon’s filters!) It’s not a lot of money, but it also doesn’t take a lot of time, and you can do it while surfing on the internet. I make an extra $100 or so a month doing it for a couple hours every night.
:) Good luck! Enjoy being a parent and don’t fret about expenses. Just make a good budget and stick to it! :)
Hi, This is our bills per month:
Rent- currently $500 about to be more as place is way too small for baby and no laundry facilities or bathtub
Debt- $265 per month (have low interest but still a lot a month!)
Computer/PS3 purchase loan= $117 (dumb purchase, trust me i learned! both payments will be gone by nov)
Groceries- about $300
Gas-$360 (crazy I know! but we both use it to get to our jobs, after baby is born, gas should be less)
Car Pymt $395 (harsh I know but only have had it for a year)
Car Ins $90 (better than last year lol)
Phone $90
We don’t pay for TV or Internet
Debt cuz of gov’t (gotta love government,yeah right) $55 been paying a month
That’s all I can think of right now
Zirbel wrote:
IDon’tEverQuit wrote:
Zirbel wrote:
I would say that you could get some governmental help and support in Canada, no? Did you ever try?
And social organizations and churches?
It could be a possibility (government i mean) BUT not until after baby. I will get maternity leave money for a little while but hubby doesn’t make even close to what we need…he’s trying so hard but nothing :(
What about CAPSS:
“CAPSS under girds 71 affiliate centres, and is presently assisting with the growth and development of another nine centres. Located in towns and cities across Canada, these centres offer practical, material, emotional and spiritual assistance by helping women and their partners or significant other through distressing pregnancies.”
http://www.capss.com/
Your provincial and territorial government should also support you during pregnancy.
It’s written here: “Early Childhood Development”: http://www.socialunion.gc.ca/nca/supp…
thanks will check out
Da⌐11 wrote:
I feel very sorry for your husband; you are treating him awfully. If you don’t love him, than you need to cut him loose and stop stringing him along while you wait for something better to come along. He is a Husband and a Father, he isn’t going to leave you while he still loves you and while he can still be those things, in some ways it would be wrong of him to do so. This is all you’re doing so you need to be the one to take charge and make the changes in both of your lives.
You tried to defend yourself with the line “I wasn’t some bored little wife who wanted cheat” in an attempt to use your sickness as excuse the things you have done and the way you have been acting. So it’s clear you know you have been treating your husband awfully; and if some “bored little wife” where doing these things you wouldn’t give her the same pass you are trying to give yourself. I would challenge your thinking on this point; I don’t think you should be using your past sickness to excuse your behavior. Maybe it was an excuse the first time you started talking to this other guy; but now it’s just a crutch and it is you who is behaving badly not your sickness from years ago.
It’s time for you’re to start making positive changes in your life. Stop talking to the ex, leave your husband completely and focus on yourself and being a good mom. Start taking charge and responsibilities for your actions.
Hmmm are we talking about the same post here? I don’t think we are. I don’t talk to any ex’s, I am crazy in love with my hubby and I think he’s the best.
Today seems to be a special day. Soooooo many people are answering totally awry to many posts! Crazy!
Anonymous
#
1 year, 10 months ago (34 minutes after post)
Dumb purchases are alright. You’ve got to give yourself a little slack now and then :) I’m building a sailboat out of a piece of plywood with my bf right now (so about $100 or so out of my savings)!
What’s your approximate wage (if you don’t mind me asking). Or you can just do the math yourself. Try to build a budget that allows you to pay for all this but also lets you build a small savings.
IDon’tEverQuit wrote:
Da⌐11 wrote:
I feel very sorry for your husband; you are treating him awfully. If you don’t love him, than you need to cut him loose and stop stringing him along while you wait for something better to come along. He is a Husband and a Father, he isn’t going to leave you while he still loves you and while he can still be those things, in some ways it would be wrong of him to do so. This is all you’re doing so you need to be the one to take charge and make the changes in both of your lives.
You tried to defend yourself with the line “I wasn’t some bored little wife who wanted cheat” in an attempt to use your sickness as excuse the things you have done and the way you have been acting. So it’s clear you know you have been treating your husband awfully; and if some “bored little wife” where doing these things you wouldn’t give her the same pass you are trying to give yourself. I would challenge your thinking on this point; I don’t think you should be using your past sickness to excuse your behavior. Maybe it was an excuse the first time you started talking to this other guy; but now it’s just a crutch and it is you who is behaving badly not your sickness from years ago.
It’s time for you’re to start making positive changes in your life. Stop talking to the ex, leave your husband completely and focus on yourself and being a good mom. Start taking charge and responsibilities for your actions.
Hmmm are we talking about the same post here? I don’t think we are. I don’t talk to any ex’s, I am crazy in love with my hubby and I think he’s the best.
sorry wrong post… what I ment to say to you…
First; having a baby is not as financial darning as it might first seem. I had the same fears before my daughter came into the world and I have to say the fear was worse then the reality. Your husband is right that it will all work out. Think of it this way, you aren’t the first to have a baby, and you aren’t the poorest to have a baby and yet the world is populated with a lot of people. You’ll manage somehow.
Other than that, why don’t you give us some more specifics on your situation? What are your ages? Income? Jobs? Where is your family? ect
once again sorry
Zirbel wrote:
Today seems to be a special day. Soooooo many people are answering totally awry to many posts! Crazy!
it’s okay. i was pissed at first until i really read it and saw it had nothing to do with what i wrote lol
Da⌐11 wrote:
Other than that, why don’t you give us some more specifics on your situation? What are your ages? Income? Jobs? Where is your family? ect
What for? I don’t need such information to see that poster has problems. And she is not a kid …
Anonymous wrote:
Dumb purchases are alright. You’ve got to give yourself a little slack now and then :) I’m building a sailboat out of a piece of plywood with my bf right now (so about $100 or so out of my savings)!
What’s your approximate wage (if you don’t mind me asking). Or you can just do the math yourself. Try to build a budget that allows you to pay for all this but also lets you build a small savings.
:) I’ve been trying. I budget ALOT to make everything fit but it seems impossible :( I make $1520/mth and hubby makes about $880/mth.
IDon’tEverQuit wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Dumb purchases are alright. You’ve got to give yourself a little slack now and then :) I’m building a sailboat out of a piece of plywood with my bf right now (so about $100 or so out of my savings)!
What’s your approximate wage (if you don’t mind me asking). Or you can just do the math yourself. Try to build a budget that allows you to pay for all this but also lets you build a small savings.
:) I’ve been trying. I budget ALOT to make everything fit but it seems impossible :( I make $1520/mth and hubby makes about $880/mth.
So than he should go on leave not you
Da⌐11 wrote:
IDon’tEverQuit wrote:
Da⌐11 wrote:
I feel very sorry for your husband; you are treating him awfully. If you don’t love him, than you need to cut him loose and stop stringing him along while you wait for something better to come along. He is a Husband and a Father, he isn’t going to leave you while he still loves you and while he can still be those things, in some ways it would be wrong of him to do so. This is all you’re doing so you need to be the one to take charge and make the changes in both of your lives.
You tried to defend yourself with the line “I wasn’t some bored little wife who wanted cheat” in an attempt to use your sickness as excuse the things you have done and the way you have been acting. So it’s clear you know you have been treating your husband awfully; and if some “bored little wife” where doing these things you wouldn’t give her the same pass you are trying to give yourself. I would challenge your thinking on this point; I don’t think you should be using your past sickness to excuse your behavior. Maybe it was an excuse the first time you started talking to this other guy; but now it’s just a crutch and it is you who is behaving badly not your sickness from years ago.
It’s time for you’re to start making positive changes in your life. Stop talking to the ex, leave your husband completely and focus on yourself and being a good mom. Start taking charge and responsibilities for your actions.
Hmmm are we talking about the same post here? I don’t think we are. I don’t talk to any ex’s, I am crazy in love with my hubby and I think he’s the best.
sorry wrong post… what I ment to say to you…
First; having a baby is not as financial darning as it might first seem. I had the same fears before my daughter came into the world and I have to say the fear was worse then the reality. Your husband is right that it will all work out. Think of it this way, you aren’t the first to have a baby, and you aren’t the poorest to have a baby and yet the world is populated with a lot of people. You’ll manage somehow.
Other than that, why don’t you give us some more specifics on your situation? What are your ages? Income? Jobs? Where is your family? ect
once again sorry
Thanks :) It’s ok lol I was just like huh? hehe. I’m crazy about my hubby. I wouldn’t trade him for anything. We are 26 (well hubby is 27 on tues) my job is accounting assistant (but not for long! just til end of dec probably), hubby works as a kitchen hand. he’s put out countless resumes but nothing :( family is around here but not able to help and they’d freak out if they knew our situation. if we could eliminate debt somehow and find moving expenses and money for baby essentials it would be SOOOO much better and less stressful! we do love this baby so much though :) we love being pregnant.
Adoption is an option, though it’d likely be hard to give up your child after you’ve been around it for a while =(
So best to keep that as a last resort.
Have you tried organizations nearby for assistance? Religious, governmental, humanitarian, etc?
IDon’tEverQuit wrote:
Da⌐11 wrote:
IDon’tEverQuit wrote:
Da⌐11 wrote:
I feel very sorry for your husband; you are treating him awfully. If you don’t love him, than you need to cut him loose and stop stringing him along while you wait for something better to come along. He is a Husband and a Father, he isn’t going to leave you while he still loves you and while he can still be those things, in some ways it would be wrong of him to do so. This is all you’re doing so you need to be the one to take charge and make the changes in both of your lives.
You tried to defend yourself with the line “I wasn’t some bored little wife who wanted cheat” in an attempt to use your sickness as excuse the things you have done and the way you have been acting. So it’s clear you know you have been treating your husband awfully; and if some “bored little wife” where doing these things you wouldn’t give her the same pass you are trying to give yourself. I would challenge your thinking on this point; I don’t think you should be using your past sickness to excuse your behavior. Maybe it was an excuse the first time you started talking to this other guy; but now it’s just a crutch and it is you who is behaving badly not your sickness from years ago.
It’s time for you’re to start making positive changes in your life. Stop talking to the ex, leave your husband completely and focus on yourself and being a good mom. Start taking charge and responsibilities for your actions.
Hmmm are we talking about the same post here? I don’t think we are. I don’t talk to any ex’s, I am crazy in love with my hubby and I think he’s the best.
sorry wrong post… what I ment to say to you…
First; having a baby is not as financial darning as it might first seem. I had the same fears before my daughter came into the world and I have to say the fear was worse then the reality. Your husband is right that it will all work out. Think of it this way, you aren’t the first to have a baby, and you aren’t the poorest to have a baby and yet the world is populated with a lot of people. You’ll manage somehow.
Other than that, why don’t you give us some more specifics on your situation? What are your ages? Income? Jobs? Where is your family? ect
once again sorry
Thanks :) It’s ok lol I was just like huh? hehe. I’m crazy about my hubby. I wouldn’t trade him for anything. We are 26 (well hubby is 27 on tues) my job is accounting assistant (but not for long! just til end of dec probably), hubby works as a kitchen hand. he’s put out countless resumes but nothing :( family is around here but not able to help and they’d freak out if they knew our situation. if we could eliminate debt somehow and find moving expenses and money for baby essentials it would be SOOOO much better and less stressful! we do love this baby so much though :) we love being pregnant.
at $1520/mth have you been contributing to any retirment plans?
Hey, folks! Are you crazy?
Adoption is not the question and neither is it separation.
Do you know to READ? ****!
Zirbel wrote:
Hey, folks! Are you crazy?
Adoption is not the question and neither is it separation.
Do you know to READ? ****!
?
Anonymous
#
1 year, 10 months ago (55 minutes after post)
I have an odd-ball possibility, go to college!
At least in America, you qualify for low interest loans to help pay for tuition. However, the loans are almost always more than you actually need. So you might be able to get enough to pay off your other debt and pay for moving expenses (most schools offer low cost, student-family housing) and easy the burden of living expenses.
Solving debt by getting more debt normally isn’t the best idea, but if neither you or your husband will have good paying jobs, it might be an option. Colleges guarantee food and housing, they have decent student job opportunities (even when you can’t find anything anywhere else), you’ll live near or on campus so you’ll use less gas, they have laundry facilities, many have free daycares, and a lot of other benefits. As new parents, you’ll get amazing financial aid which might make going to school free and access to low interest loans and financial planning services.
Plus, you’ll both come out with degrees that can help you get higher paying jobs in the future!
that idea that your husband should take maternity leave might be a good idea. I guess it depends on the type of job he does and the rules for that sort of thing in Canada. But I have known of couples who only took a few weeks of the wife’s maternity leave to allow her to heal then the husband took his until the child was eligible for daycare.
Considering you guy’s incomes, the going back to school thing would probably work in the US too. That’s a really interesting creative solution.
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Yeah, I consider it a worst-case scenario, but still an option. Just like being homeless and living on the streets is always technically an option, though something to avoid ^^
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Cell wrote:
I would never give up my baby! I would stand on the street corner begging for $ if it came to that but I would never, ever give my baby away.
My best friend who was adopted was sexually abused by her father growing up. Adoption is only good option when the alternative is abortion. Poverty is not a good reason for giving away your baby.
I think that’s going a bit far. Adoptive parents aren’t all evil, most just want children to love. Adoption should be considered anytime the parents either don’t want the baby or feel incapable of caring for it.
I don’t see any reason for it in this case..I mean she might just have to go back to work sooner than she’d like and struggle a bit.
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Cell wrote:
Adoption in this case would be absurd.
I don’t think anyone’s disagreeing with that Cell. We’re digressing.
Cell wrote:
Better to have love from your parents than a ‘good’ lifestyle. If they can put food in the kid’s mouth that is all that’s needed. Adoption in this case would be absurd.
It’s not always about money, some people have other problems. As I said, not part of this scenario, but to cast adoption in such a harsh light is a bit unwarranted. Adoptive parents are parents too, and most love their children as well. My adoptive relatives are just as much part of my family as those that are blood.
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Zirbel wrote:
Hey, folks! Are you crazy?
Adoption is not the question and neither is it separation.
Do you know to READ? ****!
DarkSnow wrote:
Zirbel wrote:
Hey, folks! Are you crazy?
Adoption is not the question and neither is it separation.
Do you know to READ? ****!
?
NOOOO WAY !
She dont need to give the baby for adoption,
ask for help from the social security’s maybe a friend,or an adult from your family..Just calm down allready told you..for the healty of yo and your baby! relax..i know its hard..but please.do.
I Don’t Ever Quit: Great user name. Live up to it :)
I have to tell you that I’m in sort of the same situation. I’m 29 weeks pregnant and this was a pregnancy that was unexpected. My son will be my 4th child; my youngest is 6.5
So. I got rid of ALL my baby things. And we are in a tough financial situation right now, too, even though we cycle through a LOT of money in a month:
Because we have rental properties, about $7K comes into our household a month. But since we still pay mortgages on the rentals, along with all our other bills, the output is about $6900/month. The little bit extra is what we use to put our kids in activities…soccer, etc when we can afford it.
So. I hit yard sales this summer. I bought a bunch of clorox wipes to clean up all the second hand stuff. I bought a bassinette at a yard sale; I bought a high chair at a yard sale. I bought baby clothes, step stool, baby bathtub, and bouncy seat at a yard sale. What I spent for ALL of the used stuff is the amount of money I would have spent for ONE thing that was new. Luckily, we had never gotten rid of our crib; it was in pieces in the basement. Had spider webs to be cleaned off, but is now as good as new :) I bought the car seat/stroller combo new. I bought one of those play yards/bassinettes/changing stations new because my father in law gave me the money for it…I didn’t have one for any of my three previous babies and I always wanted one…so he got it.
Other than that, every time I go to the store, I buy a box of diapers (or however many boxes I have coupons for) to save me in the future
I also plan to breast feed. With all three of my older kids, I breast fed exclusively for the first six months. Free food. I continued to nurse for their entire first year, but they also ate rice cereal and baby food…
I guess I could cut out our life insurance. That would save us over $200/month. But I’m afraid to because IF something happened to one of us, with out that life insurance, the surviving spouse would be destitute with the bills we have right now.
My suggestion to you is to go to yard sales or second hand stores to get supplies.
Good luck and congrats on your baby :)
Pep with a JellyBean wrote:
I Don’t Ever Quit: Great user name. Live up to it :)
I have to tell you that I’m in sort of the same situation. I’m 29 weeks pregnant and this was a pregnancy that was unexpected. My son will be my 4th child; my youngest is 6.5
So. I got rid of ALL my baby things. And we are in a tough financial situation right now, too, even though we cycle through a LOT of money in a month:
Because we have rental properties, about $7K comes into our household a month. But since we still pay mortgages on the rentals, along with all our other bills, the output is about $6900/month. The little bit extra is what we use to put our kids in activities…soccer, etc when we can afford it.
So. I hit yard sales this summer. I bought a bunch of clorox wipes to clean up all the second hand stuff. I bought a bassinette at a yard sale; I bought a high chair at a yard sale. I bought baby clothes, step stool, baby bathtub, and bouncy seat at a yard sale. What I spent for ALL of the used stuff is the amount of money I would have spent for ONE thing that was new. Luckily, we had never gotten rid of our crib; it was in pieces in the basement. Had spider webs to be cleaned off, but is now as good as new :) I bought the car seat/stroller combo new. I bought one of those play yards/bassinettes/changing stations new because my father in law gave me the money for it…I didn’t have one for any of my three previous babies and I always wanted one…so he got it.
Other than that, every time I go to the store, I buy a box of diapers (or however many boxes I have coupons for) to save me in the future
I also plan to breast feed. With all three of my older kids, I breast fed exclusively for the first six months. Free food. I continued to nurse for their entire first year, but they also ate rice cereal and baby food…
I guess I could cut out our life insurance. That would save us over $200/month. But I’m afraid to because IF something happened to one of us, with out that life insurance, the surviving spouse would be destitute with the bills we have right now.
My suggestion to you is to go to yard sales or second hand stores to get supplies.
Good luck and congrats on your baby :)
Congtz.!!!
and a good advice.
Let me skip to the good news……It’s gonna be OK. You have the spirit and courage to make it through this. Other good news… having a baby isn’t as expensive as you imagine. Expenses start coming when they want new technology and designer jeans. I recommend getting out of debt before that time but it sounds like you have that figured out. Congrats.
I don’t know how it works in your area, but can’t the government or council help you out?
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DarkSnow wrote:
Adoption is an option, though it’d likely be hard to give up your child after you’ve been around it for a while =(
So best to keep that as a last resort.
Have you tried organizations nearby for assistance? Religious, governmental, humanitarian, etc?
NO WAY. I would never give this baby up. This is the baby I’ve dreamed of for years. This is our baby. Never would I give this baby up for adoption.
Pep with a JellyBean wrote:
I Don’t Ever Quit: Great user name. Live up to it :)
I have to tell you that I’m in sort of the same situation. I’m 29 weeks pregnant and this was a pregnancy that was unexpected. My son will be my 4th child; my youngest is 6.5
So. I got rid of ALL my baby things. And we are in a tough financial situation right now, too, even though we cycle through a LOT of money in a month:
Because we have rental properties, about $7K comes into our household a month. But since we still pay mortgages on the rentals, along with all our other bills, the output is about $6900/month. The little bit extra is what we use to put our kids in activities…soccer, etc when we can afford it.
So. I hit yard sales this summer. I bought a bunch of clorox wipes to clean up all the second hand stuff. I bought a bassinette at a yard sale; I bought a high chair at a yard sale. I bought baby clothes, step stool, baby bathtub, and bouncy seat at a yard sale. What I spent for ALL of the used stuff is the amount of money I would have spent for ONE thing that was new. Luckily, we had never gotten rid of our crib; it was in pieces in the basement. Had spider webs to be cleaned off, but is now as good as new :) I bought the car seat/stroller combo new. I bought one of those play yards/bassinettes/changing stations new because my father in law gave me the money for it…I didn’t have one for any of my three previous babies and I always wanted one…so he got it.
Other than that, every time I go to the store, I buy a box of diapers (or however many boxes I have coupons for) to save me in the future
I also plan to breast feed. With all three of my older kids, I breast fed exclusively for the first six months. Free food. I continued to nurse for their entire first year, but they also ate rice cereal and baby food…
I guess I could cut out our life insurance. That would save us over $200/month. But I’m afraid to because IF something happened to one of us, with out that life insurance, the surviving spouse would be destitute with the bills we have right now.
My suggestion to you is to go to yard sales or second hand stores to get supplies.
Good luck and congrats on your baby :)
Thanks. Good luck and congrats to you too. I am definitely buying lots of the baby stuff second hand. We had a crib given to us by hubby’s family member.
psyflyer wrote:
Let me skip to the good news……It’s gonna be OK. You have the spirit and courage to make it through this. Other good news… having a baby isn’t as expensive as you imagine. Expenses start coming when they want new technology and designer jeans. I recommend getting out of debt before that time but it sounds like you have that figured out. Congrats.
I have NO idea how to get out of our debt :( No clue. We have no extra money at all
This account has been deactivated.
endrei wrote:
abortion
Very stupid reply!
Do you know to read?
IDon’tEverQuit wrote:
This is the baby I’ve dreamed of for years. This is our baby.
Try bankruptcy. I had to do it. I had a hard pregnancy and couldnt work. My husband lost his job and did not go back to work for 8 months. Bills piled up QUICK! I hated to do it, but I was drowning in debt with no way out. I learned a lesson and now have a good credit rating (worth its weight in gold).
endrei wrote:
abortion
Hell No abortion!
Read before you leave a reply!
IDon’tEverQuit wrote:
psyflyer wrote:
Let me skip to the good news……It’s gonna be OK. You have the spirit and courage to make it through this. Other good news… having a baby isn’t as expensive as you imagine. Expenses start coming when they want new technology and designer jeans. I recommend getting out of debt before that time but it sounds like you have that figured out. Congrats.
I have NO idea how to get out of our debt :( No clue. We have no extra money at all
There is a book called “The Total Money Makeover” by Dave Ramsey that can outline how to get out of debt in small steps that work. He also has a radio program. It’s doable but takes sacrifices. Good luck
The_Mom wrote:
Try bankruptcy. I had to do it. I had a hard pregnancy and couldnt work. My husband lost his job and did not go back to work for 8 months. Bills piled up QUICK! I hated to do it, but I was drowning in debt with no way out. I learned a lesson and now have a good credit rating (worth its weight in gold).
our debt was from when we were younger and stupider~
psyflyer wrote:
IDon’tEverQuit wrote:
psyflyer wrote:
Let me skip to the good news……It’s gonna be OK. You have the spirit and courage to make it through this. Other good news… having a baby isn’t as expensive as you imagine. Expenses start coming when they want new technology and designer jeans. I recommend getting out of debt before that time but it sounds like you have that figured out. Congrats.
I have NO idea how to get out of our debt :( No clue. We have no extra money at all
There is a book called “The Total Money Makeover” by Dave Ramsey that can outline how to get out of debt in small steps that work. He also has a radio program. It’s doable but takes sacrifices. Good luck
thanks will look for it.
Da⌐11 wrote:
IDon’tEverQuit wrote:
Da⌐11 wrote:
IDon’tEverQuit wrote:
Da⌐11 wrote:
I feel very sorry for your husband; you are treating him awfully. If you don’t love him, than you need to cut him loose and stop stringing him along while you wait for something better to come along. He is a Husband and a Father, he isn’t going to leave you while he still loves you and while he can still be those things, in some ways it would be wrong of him to do so. This is all you’re doing so you need to be the one to take charge and make the changes in both of your lives.
You tried to defend yourself with the line “I wasn’t some bored little wife who wanted cheat” in an attempt to use your sickness as excuse the things you have done and the way you have been acting. So it’s clear you know you have been treating your husband awfully; and if some “bored little wife” where doing these things you wouldn’t give her the same pass you are trying to give yourself. I would challenge your thinking on this point; I don’t think you should be using your past sickness to excuse your behavior. Maybe it was an excuse the first time you started talking to this other guy; but now it’s just a crutch and it is you who is behaving badly not your sickness from years ago.
It’s time for you’re to start making positive changes in your life. Stop talking to the ex, leave your husband completely and focus on yourself and being a good mom. Start taking charge and responsibilities for your actions.
Hmmm are we talking about the same post here? I don’t think we are. I don’t talk to any ex’s, I am crazy in love with my hubby and I think he’s the best.
sorry wrong post… what I ment to say to you…
First; having a baby is not as financial darning as it might first seem. I had the same fears before my daughter came into the world and I have to say the fear was worse then the reality. Your husband is right that it will all work out. Think of it this way, you aren’t the first to have a baby, and you aren’t the poorest to have a baby and yet the world is populated with a lot of people. You’ll manage somehow.
Other than that, why don’t you give us some more specifics on your situation? What are your ages? Income? Jobs? Where is your family? ect
once again sorry
Thanks :) It’s ok lol I was just like huh? hehe. I’m crazy about my hubby. I wouldn’t trade him for anything. We are 26 (well hubby is 27 on tues) my job is accounting assistant (but not for long! just til end of dec probably), hubby works as a kitchen hand. he’s put out countless resumes but nothing :( family is around here but not able to help and they’d freak out if they knew our situation. if we could eliminate debt somehow and find moving expenses and money for baby essentials it would be SOOOO much better and less stressful! we do love this baby so much though :) we love being pregnant.
at $1520/mth have you been contributing to any retirment plans?
sorry just seen this reply. no can’t afford to. barely paying bills.
I m here
Zirbel
Da⌐11
DarkSnow
jeanema
ℓινιηg4уσυ
Pepper Jelly
psyflyer
BuckingFastard (J.N)
endrei
The_Mom