question help: I have just had an hour of listening to my adult daughter telling me how I was such a bad mother and how I let her and her siblings down. - Help.com

You dont have to make up for anything. that attitude is saying, I really dont want to do this, but I will because I made some mistakes in raising my kids… Do it because you want to, and not because your being punished..Also remember there is another side to the story, which is your kids take on all this.. You cant possibly go back in time, but you could start right now being a good parent, because you want this..

You don’t. If their lives suck, it’s their own fault! You taught them well. You taught them that, in spite of all adversities, you did what was necessary in order to support them. Put that on card stock and stick in on your door. Tell them that you are on vacation, which they should be paying for, bc of all of the hardships that they brought on you. :D

Tell them babysitting is now $15 an hour and no more free meals or handouts.
Show them what a bad mom is all about. Criticize everything they do. Treat them as they treat you. Ralph does not suffer fools well, I give them a taste of their own medicine and see how they swallow it…….

Embarrassed by having a single mom? Did they live in one of those rare communities where all the other kids had both parents? I had a single mom and I was never embarrassed by it. And don’t think you did poorly, my mother is literally crazy and was at times horrible and abusive towards me growing up, but I would NEVER say she was a terrible mother. Granted, I know now her problems were her own fault, but she raised me as well as she could and taught me important things, and for that I thank her because she did everything she could. It sounds to me like your daughter has her own issues she’s projecting onto you.

Thankyou for all your replies, I m feeling a bit better about it now. I told her that I remember the bad times but the good times far outnumbered the bad. I held down 3 jobs at one point and they were left to care for their younger siblings, which I regretted but we needed to eat!! I had to go on benefits for a while and believe me that was far worse! It seems her Father has been in touch and that is what brought on the revelations that I was such a bad mum, I think she is angry at him for leaving and rather than hit out at him she s taking it out on me.

DPT wrote:
Other than midgets with cigars that burns my butt.

Highlight of my day so far…..

” I think she is angry at him for leaving and rather than hit out at him she s taking it out on me. “

Well, we had the same sort of thing go on with my step-children. Their mother would always try to interfere. (we had custody) We took them to the child-psychologist adn she said that ‘They are angry with you two, because they feel safe with you. They can be angry and know that you won’t just walk away. They don’t show their feelings to their mother, bc they aren’t safe in their relationship with her, so, unfortunately, you’ll have to bare the brunt for now.”