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its never too late

Siren wrote:
its never too late

Do you have any training at all in the culinary field? Apply for a job that is related to what you want to do/study. Some businesses still help with tuition costs.

Where there’s a will, there’s a way. :)

well my grandfather used to say that the only time you stop learning is when you die. by extension so long as you’re alive…

Siren wrote:
its never too late

which isn’t to say that it’ll be easy. Probably look for a support group to help you, they’ll probably be a bit more tolerant of bridge burning tendencies that may result for your conditions. Church’s generally provide a good support network to help people get back on their feet during difficult times.

You don’t need to be a believer to ask for help (at least at a Christian church; something about helping thy neighbour or something like that). Although thats not to say finding faith is a something that is to be avoided. Faith can give people a lot of internal strength and will to get back on their feet.

Well, just about anyone can get a job if not too fussy. You probably don’t want to be a farm picker or such. :) There are tons of jobs in North Dakota for $13+/hr because of the oil boon and a shortage of labor. It isn’t easy to pick up and move though. That takes a little planning. :)

What’s the closest city in Jersey? Have you tried http://www.indeed.com for job searching? http://www.takeourjobs.org if you want to get hired on a farm. :) You might want to consider volunteer jobs that give you room/meals in exchange for your labor. That might work well if you are attending school.

Have a look at the Institute of Culinary Education (50 West 23rd Street, New York http://www.iceculinary.com )
See there: http://www.iceculinary.com/career/adm…

I guess they can advise you more exactly.

Do you have a driver’s license? Vehicle? Delivery drivers (pizza/etc) make very good money. I know a few who make well over $100/night in cash tips.

I sympathise with your situation, it sounds bad and I can understand why you feel so desperate. A starting point is your question: is it just too late for me? I wondered Too late for what? Basically you are going to have to have realistic expectations about what you can achieve in life and what is going to count, for you, as a reasonable life to live. We all have to do this: is it too late for me to be a high flying academic : Yes, is it too late for me to find new areas of interest in life? No. Since you recognise you are bi-polar, but say that the drugs don’t work then it is unreasonable for you to expect to be happy all the time.

I suggest taking small steps and setting some obtainable goals. You sound like you need support and I guess joining a community based group of people with smilar problems may help

Identify one thing that makes you smile or feel good (even if it is just a walk in a park on a sunny day, or reading in the library) and try and make sure you reward yourself by bulding that into your daily or weekly routine.

Some habits you will need to break and only you can do this. You show an awareness of your condition and its impact on others so I think you might manage the next step of stopping doing the most damaging things

I am sorry this is all rather abstract given the very real financial pressures you must be under. I got my first, full time paid work when I was 31 and I’ve suffered depression. It took training, counselling, qualifications, personal effort and luck. I hope you can use your resources to acheive a measure of happiness. Best wishes,

I hope you’re on a well balanced medication against the bipolar disease! It can help a lot to get stable.

NEver is to late..too late is when you dont try!

If you’re single, and have the wherewithal, you go where the money is instead of waiting for it to come to you. Pull up stakes and chase those opportunities instead of slowly sinking.

The simplest would be to start as a salaried trainee on the job like an unskilled employee in the kitchen of a restaurant.
At a cook’s side you’ll learn the most about cooking …

venomsblade wrote:
it has crossed my mind to do this but i just dont know how i would support myself and make the trip without becoming just a homeless bum (sorry if the term is offensive to anyone)wondering

Having been a ‘homeless bum’ (rubbertramp) for much of my life, I take no offense. Really, if you’re smart with your money it can be amazingly cheap to live. There are also food banks and, if worse come to worse, welfare. Still plenty of jobs out there, despite the doom & gloom.. just that too many people are looking for the ‘cream’.

Stop moaning — ACT!

All you’ve said in reply to Zirbel is reasonable.BUT The fact remains only you can do something to change your situation if it can be changed at all. That doesn’t mean you can acheive things on your own or without help, but you need to take the first new steps. Deciding to go on this site is one, I guess, hope you find what you are looking for.

Actually I am afraid that can be an aspect of depression- a kind of lack of commitment to a situation, a restlessness or perfectionism , also (this is where therapy can help) we look to be heared and recognised and accepted for who we are. That is why I originally suggested loking around you for even small things that you enjoy. The burning bridges and destruction of relationships etc can be another symptom of feeling the current place is not right that you have to move on to find happiness.

venomsblade wrote:
no medication worked for me and treatment in general

I’ve (strong) bipolar people in my own family. So I know very well what I’m telling you about:
You will NEVER handle it WITHOUT constant medication together with periodical talk therapy!

There is a wide range of medication for, the only problem is to balance it the right way (some medication for the ups some for the downs), it works different from patient to patient. That’s why it takes some time and needs MUCH PATIENCE from your side.

A general practicer is overwhelmed with this disorder. You HAVE to see a psychiatrist, regularly. There is no other way.

Sorry, but nobody here can help you — from afar.
That’s why I said before that YOU have to ACT. Only you.
 
(B.t.w. Have a look at the Bipolar Disorder Forum: http://www.psychforums.com/bipolar/ )

Hey do I know you Venomsblade? You kind of sound like one of my friends, you’ll be alright the whole bipolar and depression disorders are brought on by the government and the fact that society speeds up every year. I’m looking forward to December 21st its supposed to be the end of the world…but you never know. It could just be an awful stock crash that puts everyone back in the depression. So tell me why are you depressed? Not enough money? Failed relationships? I’m 8 months pregnant right now and it was completely by accident. So I have to give him up for adoption my first. I’m 21 turning 22 in April and I feel like I ****** up my life too. But for some reason this child made me take care of my responsibilities and myself. I’m more likely to get a job now and stick with it. The other jobs I had sucked and I couldn’t stick with them because of my paranoia issues. Once you get out of your mind you’ll feel ALOT better and the food thing your doing stop because its only going to make you feel more like crap I also ate when I was stressed and sad and it made me furious that I gained weight. I started working out again got back down to my normal size and then got pregnant but its all in my stomach so its okay :D. Just keep your head up and hopes up and we’ll both make it through this crazy adventure.

i’m sure this is too late but in any case, for others in similar situations - if you’re at the bottom, start working at the bottom and do not go to culinary school until you have some work experience in the industry. get a job washing dishes or bussing tables and work your way up. then think about c school because the industry is rough and you may not fit in and everyday will be a struggle even if you love cooking. i’m not saying don’t pursue your dreams, just work in it first.
and read the article below by Anthony Bourdain who gives a very true picture of the industry.

http://ruhlman.com/2010/09/so-you-wan…