Stay help: i hate when u ask for help and they just tell you to stay positive - Help.com

It translates to ” I really dont have the time or energy to help you, so Ill give you a token cliche instead”

Ok then stay negative and see if that helps :)

I´ll pray for you.

http://bit.ly/rH0iSn

To get the best answers here, ask for specific help. “How do I deal with my alcoholic mother and old stepdad when they ___________” will get better answers.

I guess what u really want is for someone to listen to you and care what you have to say? do u feel ignored when they tell u to stay positive?

We do care; very much. But sometimes we just don’t have answers. We want to say something, but we have no idea what, so we give a simple answer to try to show that we are listening and that we are sorry you are having a rough time.

what sort of help r u after?

That’s not fair. Often, we CAN help, but we have to understand the question. We have to have concrete information so we can give decent advice.

i think the first best step is knowing what u want

How do you know we won’t believe you? Have you told lies here before?

yes, what do u want, and what do u want people to do for you? theres no way anyone can help u if u dont tell them.

Maybe “stay positive” is good advice. Did you try it?

Oh. Hm. So you need your mom to go to alcoholics anonymous and your dad to make wise decisions about being healthier, and you need overall much less stress and frustration in life. Is that close?

stepdad*

so u want to move out?

okay…I think I understand

Have you been to meetings for teenagers with alcoholic parents? I don’t know what the group is called, but I know most communities have one.

Go to those meetings! You will find other young people going through the same problems, and you will find adults who can help you to deal with the other problems, too.

Alateen, it’s called. Go there!

will not all people are so Profsinal
stay postive sometimes it could not help
but at lest it nice being people beshide me

How come? Is there some specific thing stopping you?

1) everyone cries there. And crying together is not a bad thing.
2) everyone there is self-conscious and nervous. Just take it one minute at a time.
3) losing track and letting a lot out is the point.

If its a wichcraft thing try this website: Lucky Mojo Curio Company. They are really great there, try the candles.

I know. theres a lot of problems. I like to write a list of the problems, Im a big list maker. Then try to work on them and if one of the problems goes away you can cross it off your list.

Understood; but you have to start somewhere.

no, not always

Sometimes, you have to start from the place that will give you the most support and the most strength. Then you can face the other problems from higher ground.

Maybe that one is just too hard so you work on one of the little ones first. Whichever way you think will work.

I’ve got to go take a walk or something but first I’ll explain one thing I think is essential about “staying positive” — just in case all those other people didn’t explain themselves. It is this: If you believe that there could be a solution, that things could get better, then you are more likely to actually try out things that might be a solution. This is just straightforward logic, not unrealistic optimism. If you reject every idea that anything will help then you aren’t as likely to find the thing which really does help. So… maybe staying positive seems unrealistic if you’re in a frustrated painful situation, but if you accept that there’s always a slight hint of a chance of a hope that everything could get better, then that leaves you open to accepting a better life if it offers itself to you.

I hope you don’t hate that, and now I’m off to walk through the snow (because I hate all this painful thinking and just want to feel something positive like walking), good luck.

kerieka wrote:
one i would cry two i dont like it when people look at me when i talk about this stuff three i would go of track and alot might come out

To me, this sounds like you’re ready to open up and actually get some help.

And great answer, Michael. (mindhealer)

thanks

kerieka wrote:
how to cope with … mum alcolic

You can find strength and hope for family members and friends of alcohol addicts at Al-Anon/Alateen.

Local Meetings:
· U.S. and Canada: http://www.al-anon.alateen.org/local-…
· Other countries: http://www.al-anon.alateen.org/intern… & http://www.al-anon.alateen.org/meetin…
· Electronic and Telephone Meetings: http://www.al-anon.alateen.org/pdf/EN…

Well try to stay positive about it.

:P

Being angry, sad or frustrated about something is often not productive when one is trying to solve problems.

Being negative has its up side. To me it means that you are dealing with the problem and not glossing it over. Facing it and devoting yourself to healing from it is the key, even if you cant do it with composure.

You know, if I could i’d come to your house and shake the help in you but since I can’t this is what you get. First of all stop trying that’s the problem right there. See when you try, you only do half the work. When you do something always focus on actually doing and completing the challenge as you will get more done. Second of all you have to accept that there are just some things you can’t change. Stopping your mom from drinking, all she’s going to say is “im grown I can drink if I want, your just a child, my child so I tell you what to do” so that’s not going to work. You can sit down and talk to her, saying “I just want to help you” but people’s minds can’t change just like that. When you put it that way, your in quite the dilly of a pickle you are. Normally i’d tell you what this post is dedicated to hating but…:/

“your in quite the dilly of a pickle”

I Google mapped “Quite the dilly of a pickle.” and got no results. Sounds a little risqué - exciting. I would like to visit. Perhaps buy a postcard. How are the restaurants?

:P Great phrase.

Mr_Grit wrote:
“your in quite the dilly of a pickle”

I Google mapped “Quite the dilly of a pickle.” and got no results. Sounds a little risqué - exciting. I would like to visit. Perhaps buy a postcard. How are the restaurants?

:P Great phrase.

Mmmph :/
first thing that popped into my mind, thinking about stuff:p

Yo.
Stay Positive.

Try drugs or alcohol.

Hows that for a new solution method? Read and adsorb quick, the mods are obligated by our lord and savior Big Brother to take down unconventional advice.

Run with it amigo.

Sorry to burst your bubble Snar, but that is wrong advice to be giving anyone, and you know it.
Anyone in your situation would be upset and hurt, and I most definitely feel for you, kerieka. Sadly, drinkers will not stop drinking unless they see their drinking is causing problems and because they are drunk for a lot of the time, this doesn’t usually happen. I would be keeping my distance as best as possible from your mother and yes, as Zirbel suggests, get yourself in a group, such as Alanon. You will be surrounded by others who are in the same home life, who will share their stories, give ideas and advice and understanding because they DO understand what you are living with. I wish you all the best always and stay strong. X

Snar wrote:
Try drugs or alcohol.

Hows that for a new solution method? Read and adsorb quick, the mods are obligated by our lord and savior Big Brother to take down unconventional advice.

Run with it amigo.

DUDE YOU ARE CRAZY!!! HAHAHAHAHHAA
I’m having trouble holding my sides right now.
THAT IS SUCH AWFUL ADVICE!!
Why are you screwing with people? xD
He was drunk when he made that post, if anybody was wondering.

Get out of your bubble. Learn what the world is really about. We are all losers here. *tips hat*

Yeah really? You know what Charlie says to that don’t you?