relationship help: Please help, I feel broken after the largest fight I’ve been in with my partner. - Help.com

Difficult to say … sex is not the basis of life in my opinion and not the most important thing. I jsut think she needs some help in taking it slow. She’s probably nervous and scared as most women are the first time around, so jsut be slow and gentle with her maybe say that yes you do want to do that with her but say ur not in any hurry and when she’s ready you can take it to the next step.

You must love her or you wouldn’t be with her for 3 years without sex to begin with, shes jsut scared that in no way means she is never going to have sex it jsut means she’s afraid she wont enjoy it or that it’ll feel horrible. You can’t blame her women are different from men in that area. Just take it slow, be understanding and loving and just show her that it’s not a bad thing.

I’d respect her wishes.

Women tend to get the short end of the stick when they have sex with guys who are only boyfriends. They get pregnant . . . the boyfriend always denies the baby is his and he leaves her.

Until a guy is ready to present a woman with an engagement ring, and is ready to take on the responsibilities of being a husband, I don’t think a woman should take off her clothes for him.

chev.jame wrote:
I’d respect her wishes.

Women tend to get the short end of the stick when they have sex with guys who are only boyfriends. They get pregnant . . . the boyfriend always denies the baby is his and he leaves her.

Until a guy is ready to present a woman with an engagement ring, and is ready to take on the responsibilities of being a husband, I don’t think a woman should take off her clothes for him.

definately fair enough. I agree sometimes women need to feel like they are entirely safe with you to be able to do certain things.

I honestly don’t see the problem here. It’s just sex. It’s not like you found out that you can’t have children, or something important like that.

If you love her, you should wait untill she’s ready to let her guard down and lay in bed with you. Sex is so overly over rated that sometimes we forget that it’s such a touchy and sensitive subject or act. A lot of women out here aren’t as guarded with their private parts as she is so you should feel glad that your not dating some floozy. But nonetheless, she won’t be holding out for forever she’ ll let you in sometime. Just stop bothering her about it and give her time to mentally and emotionally prepare for it. Remain strong!

Here’s a rule you should never forget: a gentleman never pressures a woman to have sex.

It’s as simple as that.

Or a lady, for that matter!

tythecooldude0 wrote:
It’s funny when I read all the quotes above. It really doesn’t apply to me. Female having the short end of the stick, babies, marriage… All things that can’t happen when its a girl with girl. *sighs*

Well, that’s probably because you’ve deluded yourself into putting too much importance on sex. Have you tried developing OTHER parts of your relationship? I’m not saying there’s anything wrong with you, it just sounds like your “partner” or whatever you want to call her, is having a lot of deep issues as well.

I’d also advise that you both cut out pornography from your lives. Porn has a way of distorting a person’s ideas about reality. People watch porn and forget that it’s just actors PRETENDING and putting on a show for the camera. It’s not real, no matter how realistic it may seem. People get so caught up in the fantasy, that they forget how to actually be with real life people with real life insecurities and fears.