This post left anonymously
I’m a 24 year old guy.
I recently met two girls, 22 and 23, that are just awesome. One is a lesbian and the other is straight. We hung out a few times and I realized that I definitely want them to be a part of my life in some way. I seem to really connect with the lesbian girl and I think she could be an awesome long term friend. I love her honesty. The other girl could be a great friend as well but I’ve also played with the idea of pursuing a romantic relationship with her. She is great with children, quirky, and really cares about her own physical/mental well-being.
That was a quick summary of the back story.. here is the problem.
Now that I’ve realized I really like these girls and I want them in my life, I am having severe anxiety. I am starting to come off as needy. I had irrational thoughts that they ditched me on a dinner date and I told them that I’m going to need better communication or I can’t continue the friendship. It was a really minor thing that I overreacted to because I was afraid that I was going to get hurt.
I know that they enjoy my company when I’m relaxed. I want to relax. I feel like I’m constantly in fight or flight mode when I think of them. I’m scared about something and don’t know exactly what that is. I want to just continue with my life as it is with them somewhere in it. I don’t want to focus on them this much, but I feel paranoid and somehow at risk. I feel like these budding relationships are precious and I need to constantly tend to them, when in fact I’m just going to drown it out if I continue down this path.
I needed to talk to somebody. If anyone has any advice they can offer I would appreciate it. I’m supposed to have dinner with them tonight, but at this rate I’m not sure why they would want to continue seeing me!
Thanks so much.
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