boyfriend help: Is life always so full of drama?

Agent Smith

An Unknown Location

Editors:

ellenmaryellen

Is life always so full of drama?

I wish things would settle down for a while.

Alright in the last few months: Mum died from cancer, best friend’s ex-boyfriend threatened to kill himself after they broke up (which upset her considerably since her father killed himself) didn’t happen, but now he’s a stalker…, two suicidal friends, one of which tried something, and I talked down the other one, Dad just had shoulder surgery a few days ago, brother is… well… extremely difficult to deal with (details aren’t important, but its definitely him causing issues with everyone around him), Dad is also planning to go to the Phillipines to meet someone who he met online and possibly bring her back to Australia (which I’m fine with, its just logistically difficult for a number of reasons, including that he wants to do it before my brother and I start at uni). I’ve had two bouts of food poisoning since mum died, and had weight loss issues as well as depression. two other friends got flooded recently. Oh and I sliced my thumb open the other day, now part of my finger is tingly and carrying on generally. I’ve had class conflicts both this semester and last semester, and my brother who is starting out this year also has clashes, which I’ve had to sort out because he’s freaking clueless. I think those are the main headlines.

So is life always like this? Thats all in the last 2 months. I need a break. And I’m on uni holidays at the moment… :/

This open post was written 1 year, 3 months ago | V/U/S: 974, 12, 8 | Edit Post | Leave a reply | Report Post

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Since writing this post Agent Smith may have helped people, but has not within the last 4 days. Agent Smith is a verified member, has been around for 2 years, 2 months and has 20 posts and 477 replies to their name.

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weight loss, depression, australia, boyfriend, like this, Poisoning, Clueless, Shoulder, Planning, surgery (How Tags Affect Reciprocity)

Replies (12)

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HelpBot 2 #
San Francisco, CA, US | 1 year, 3 months ago (0 minutes after post)

If you are contemplating suicide, hurting yourself, or you are seriously depressed: please, seek professional help!

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Agent Smith 1 #
An Unknown Location | 1 year, 3 months ago (2 minutes after post)

Thanks HelpBot but I’m not in danger of doing that myself, just some of my friends. :p

Help me with: As some of you on here know I lost my mother to cancer in 2011.

Mariam* 3 #
An Undisclosed Location | 1 year, 3 months ago (16 minutes after post)

Only for a while. The chaos comes and goes.

Help me with: Where can my children practice playing their musical instruments without annoying the neighbors?

fsd #
An Unknown Location | 1 year, 3 months ago (30 minutes after post)

I think we all experience this gathering of chaos once in our life.

This account has been deactivated.

This reply has been removed.

Anonymous #
1 year, 3 months ago (1 hour, 58 minutes after post)

as what pnov said but with a smaller vocabulary :)

I was in a cafe the other day with 3 of my friends, 2 of them find life really dramatic and full off chaos, the other one he is quite relaxed and always enjoys just doing anything,
as we was drinking coffee and chatting s’it,We all heard a fight breaking out on the streets, out of the 4 of us guess what two got up to get a better view?

Agent Smith 1 #
An Unknown Location | 1 year, 3 months ago (10 hours, 15 minutes after post)

Pnov wrote:

Is life so full of drama?

Not for everyone. So, if you’re experiencing a lot of drama, you can probably resolve much of it by looking within yourself, to your beliefs or attitudes, to see how you’re a ‘match’ to the drama you experience.

We attract what we believe and feel. This is the essence of Karma, or Reaping What We Sow.

If you don’t like what you’re experiencing, look to see how your thinking or beliefs and feelings may be contributing or causing what you experience. If you change how you think and feel, you will change what you come to experience. Consider the following:

“All that we are arises with our thoughts. With our thoughts, we make our world.” The Buddha

“We create our own heaven or hell. Your thoughts can imprison you or set you free. Complications, conditions or people do not upset you, but the way you think about them causes your upset. Freedom is not possible until we discipline and retrain our minds.” - p. 124 of Choose To Live Peacefully by Susan Smith Jones, Ph.D.

“If you say, “I just can’t help the way I feel,” you will only make yourself a victim of your misery ~ and you’ll be fooling yourself, because you can change the way you feel.
If you want to feel better, you must realize that your thoughts and attitudes–not external events–create your feelings. You can learn to change the way your think, feel, and behave in the here-and-now.” - from The Feeling Good Handbook by Dr. David Burns

“If you let the world affect how you feel, what you are saying is, “I do not make my own decisions, I just have a Pavlovian response to anything that may twang my emotions.”” Stuart Wilde in ‘Life Was Never Meant To Be A Struggle’

“You are the sovereign authority for your life. You are the ruler who makes the decisions regarding how you will act, what information you will accept. You do it anyway — but if you RECOGNIZE that you do it, you can gain much greater control over your future.

But whether or not you accept it, you are sovereign. You rule one life — and you rule it totally.” - Harry Browne, in ‘How I Found Freedom In An Unfree World’
Source: http://www.mindpowernews.com/BeFree.htm

“Everything in our experience is mirroring what we believe to be true.” Jeddah Mali

What we BELIEVE to be true is often NOT ‘truth’ but bias, prejudice or opinion. But still, we tend to always experience what we believe. So, if you, for example, believe “people are hard to get along with,” or, “I don’t know who I can trust,” that is what you will tend to experience.

By the way, I also believe that EVERYTHING that happens is neither good or bad, but how we experience them depends ONLY on how we think about them, or what we believe about the experiences.

“There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so.” -William Shakespeare

“The thing always happens that you really believe in; and the belief in a thing makes it happen.” — Frank Lloyd Wright, Master Architect

“It’s not what people don’t know that hurts them. It’s what they do know that just ain’t so.” Will Rogers

Anonymous wrote:
as what pnov said but with a smaller vocabulary :)

I was in a cafe the other day with 3 of my friends, 2 of them find life really dramatic and full off chaos, the other one he is quite relaxed and always enjoys just doing anything,
as we was drinking coffee and chatting s’it,We all heard a fight breaking out on the streets, out of the 4 of us guess what two got up to get a better view?

So what you’re saying is to put my head in the sand with relation to the things I don’t like? That seems idiotic to me. I could create my own fantasy world in my head to escape from the real world for a while, but doing that isn’t living a real life, its pretending.

None of the things I have listed could have been prevented by me having a different attitude or beliefs. And I’m not looking for a way to avoid these things, they are what they are and I’ll take them as they come, all I was asking is whether other people usually find life to be quite so full on all the time or whether its just a patch I’m going through.

I’m not exactly looking for drama to fill my life up with, my friends look to me for help, the problems at home are at home and are quite unavoidable.

[quote Pnov][quote]Is life so full of drama?[/quote]

Not for everyone. So, if you’re experiencing a lot of drama, you can probably resolve much of it by looking within yourself, to your beliefs or attitudes, to see how you’re a ‘match’ to the drama you experience.

We attract what we believe and feel. This is the essence of Karma, or Reaping What We Sow.

If you don’t like what you’re experiencing, look to see how your thinking or beliefs and feelings may be contributing or causing what you experience. If you change how you think and feel, you will change what you come to experience. Consider the following:

“All that we are arises with our thoughts. With our thoughts, we make our world.” The Buddha

“We create our own heaven or hell. Your thoughts can imprison you or set you free. Complications, conditions or people do not upset you, but the way you think about them causes your upset. Freedom is not possible until we discipline and retrain our minds.” - p. 124 of Choose To Live Peacefully by Susan Smith Jones, Ph.D.

“If you say, “I just can’t help the way I feel,” you will only make yourself a victim of your misery ~ and you’ll be fooling yourself, because you can change the way you feel.
	If you want to feel better, you must realize that your thoughts and attitudes--not external events--create your feelings.  You can learn to change the way your think, feel, and behave in the here-and-now.”  -  from The Feeling Good Handbook by Dr. David Burns

“If you let the world affect how you feel, what you are saying is, "I do not make my own decisions, I just have a Pavlovian response to anything that may twang my emotions."” Stuart Wilde in ‘Life Was Never Meant To Be A Struggle’

“You are the sovereign authority for your life. You are the ruler who makes the decisions regarding how you will act, what information you will accept. You do it anyway -- but if you RECOGNIZE that you do it, you can gain much greater control over your future.

But whether or not you accept it, you are sovereign. You rule one life -- and you rule it totally.” - Harry Browne, in ‘How I Found Freedom In An Unfree World’ 
Source: http://www.mindpowernews.com/BeFree.htm

“Everything in our experience is mirroring what we believe to be true.” Jeddah Mali

What we BELIEVE to be true is often NOT ‘truth’ but bias, prejudice or opinion. But still, we tend to always experience what we believe. So, if you, for example, believe “people are hard to get along with,” or, “I don’t know who I can trust,” that is what you will tend to experience.

By the way, I also believe that EVERYTHING that happens is neither good or bad, but how we experience them depends ONLY on how we think about them, or what we believe about the experiences.

“There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so.” -William Shakespeare

“The thing always happens that you really believe in; and the belief in a thing makes it happen.”  --  Frank Lloyd Wright, Master Architect

"It's not what people don't know that hurts them. It's what they do know that just ain't so." Will Rogers[/quote]

[quote Anonymous]as what pnov said but with a smaller vocabulary :)

I was in a cafe the other day with 3 of my friends, 2 of them find life really dramatic and full off chaos, the other one he is quite relaxed and always enjoys just doing anything, 
as we was drinking coffee and chatting s'it,We all heard a fight breaking out on the streets, out of the 4 of us guess what two got up to get a better view?[/quote]

So what you're saying is to put my head in the sand with relation to the things I don't like?  That seems idiotic to me.  I could create my own fantasy world in my head to escape from the real world for a while, but doing that isn't living a real life, its pretending.

None of the things I have listed could have been prevented by me having a different attitude or beliefs.  And I'm not looking for a way to avoid these things, they are what they are and I'll take them as they come, all I was asking is whether other people usually find life to be quite so full on all the time or whether its just a patch I'm going through.

I'm not exactly looking for drama to fill my life up with, my friends look to me for help, the problems at home are at home and are quite unavoidable.

Help me with: As some of you on here know I lost my mother to cancer in 2011.

This reply has been removed.

Intoxincatin 0 #
An Unknown Location | 1 year, 1 month ago (2 months after post)

Awww… you poor baby. Its not always going to be like this. Things will get better all you have to do is keep fighting. And by writing this post, your doing good. Talk it out, talk about it a million times if you have too because that’s the only way to get over tragedy. Also your not the parent. Let your father sort out his life and your brothers. The time you spend in Uni will be short, so you need to enjoy it atleast a little. Be selfish :) leave other peoples problems for them to suss out at least for sometime

ellenmaryellen 1 #
An Unknown Location | 1 year ago (3 months, 1 week after post)

Okay - I am an ex-vice CEO of Government. I am female. Divorced. Mom, Dad, Brother, gone. I am only 58. Yadda, yadda, yadda. SO INSTEAD OF LOGIC or conjecture, let me try something else. Go to http://www.wofs.com — it’s a Feng Shui website. OR if you have an iPhone, download a Feng Shui Bagua app. It’s free. Enter your date of birth. Check your best, and least desirable directions. If, for example your WORST direction is “west” and you sleep with your head pointing in that direction, MOVE YOUR BED to your best direction. You will get through the trauma, but, sometimes, oftentimes, things come in 3’s.

Confuscious says, move 29 things, change will come. What the heck. Try it (it works, by the way).

Help me with: ALAS, THE OTHER SHOE HAS FINALLY DROPPED…My USA son married a Canadian woman on 12/24/12.

noonelikesaknowitall 6 #
An Undisclosed Location | 11 months, 2 weeks ago (4 months, 1 week after post)

One thing I have found is that I have limited resources. Be there for your friends and family while you have the strength but do not balk at putting in boundaries should you find it all getting to much for you. I have found it hard accepting my limitations and have a tendency to be overly emotionally responsible for people. I hope there is someone you can turn to, too talk about your feelings through all this. Some one who you can ask for help.

Sorry to hear about your mum, that is a big thing to go through at any stage of life and you are young. This is def a stage, things will calm down… Happiness and joy will return one day… That was my experience after my father died. It did take a while and I ended up having to work through quite a bit of stuff around that (it was a complicated relationship) I have grown as a person though.

ellenmaryellen edited this post 10 months, 2 weeks ago. Read the previous text »

Is life always so full of drama? I wish things would settle down for a while.

Alright in the last few months: Mum died from cancer, best friend’s ex-boyfriend threatened to kill himself after they broke up (which upset her considerably since her father killed himself) didn’t happen, but now he’s a stalker…, two suicidal friends, one of which tried something, and I talked down the other one, Dad just had shoulder surgery a few days ago, brother is… well… extremely difficult to deal with (details aren’t important, but its definitely him causing issues with everyone around him), Dad is also planning to go to the Phillipines to meet someone who he met online and possibly bring her back to Australia (which I’m fine with, its just logistically difficult for a number of reasons, including that he wants to do it before my brother and I start at uni). I’ve had two bouts of food poisoning since mum died, and had weight loss issues as well as depression. two other friends got flooded recently. Oh and I sliced my thumb open the other day, now part of my finger is tingly and carrying on generally. I’ve had class conflicts both this semester and last semester, and my brother who is starting out this year also has clashes, which I’ve had to sort out because he’s freaking clueless. I think those are the main headlines.

So is life always like this? Thats all in the last 2 months. I need a break. And I’m on uni holidays at the moment… :/

Help me with: ALAS, THE OTHER SHOE HAS FINALLY DROPPED…My USA son married a Canadian woman on 12/24/12.

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