life help: why is life so unfair? - Help.com

life isn’t unfair, life is just life.
No one ever said lit’s supposed to be easy.

well why is it that people who want children the most cannot fall pregnant.
the people who need money die because they cant afford the right medical treatment.
people that abuse other people get to walk free

Why is it that some people who really want kids and think they can’t suddenly find themselves pregnant?
Why is it that so many people can be saved now from dying young and painfully because of developments in modern medicine?
Why is it that people can fall in love?
Why is it that in the modern world when someone is abused or treated unfair something can actually be done about it? Why is it that science can prove who did it rather than it just being word of mouth?

There is good and bad in the world.
If you focus on the bad it seems unfair, but it’s not, it’s just the luck of the draw.
The fact that there exists fertility treatments to help people become pregnant who would otherwise never have been is amazing.
The fact modern medicine has cut down the death rate of children has increased life expectancy and is able to help cure and prevent diseases is amazing.
The fact a lot of abusers get what they have coming to them and that victims have support groups and organisations to turn to for help is amazing.
There are two sides.

i just found out i cannot fall pregnant.

because of 3 different reasons.

1.PCOS
2.pelvic inflammatory disease
3.sub septate uterus

please tell me this is unfair becuase i dont know what is

Anonymous wrote:
well why is it that people who want children the most cannot fall pregnant.
the people who need money die because they cant afford the right medical treatment.
people that abuse other people get to walk free

After a lot of study, living, reflecting, considering and experimenting, I’ve come to believe there is at least a kind of fairness about life.

For instance, I think you asked: Why is it that people who want children the most often can’t get pregnant? I believe a part of the answer lies in what goes on when someone wants something very much. When they do they tend to feel INCOMPLETE without the thing they want (whether it’s a baby, or a girl or boy friend, or a job or a millions dollars, etc.) And so, the ‘vibe’ they’re putting out is one of RESISTANCE to the very thing they want.

And, with people who abuse other people,… sometimes the abused person doesn’t have the sense of Self Worth that would enable them to speak up, to help prosecute the abuser.

In my own life, I’ve noticed that as I improve myself (learn to think more constructively, take more responsibiity for my life, learn to value myself, learn how to ‘read’ others, etc.) my life has gotten easier, and I’m happier. So, to me, it seems life is being fair to me. (Back when I didn’t feel responsible, and was blaming people or circumstances, my life didn’t work, and I also thought life seemed to be unfair.)

Here are some thoughts you might want to consider:

“With your thoughts you make your world.” The Buddha

“We create our own heaven or hell. Your thoughts can imprison you or set you free. Complications, conditions or people do not upset you, but the way you think about them causes your upset. Freedom is not possible until we discipline and retrain our minds.” - p. 124 of Choose To Live Peacefully by Susan Smith Jones, Ph.D.

“If you say, “I just can’t help the way I feel,” you will only make yourself a victim of your misery ~ and you’ll be fooling yourself, because you can change the way you feel.
If you want to feel better, you must realize that your thoughts and attitudes–not external events–create your feelings. You can learn to change the way your think, feel, and behave in the here-and-now.” - from The Feeling Good Handbook by Dr. David Burns

“If you let the world affect how you feel, what you are saying is, “I do not make my own decisions, I just have a Pavlovian response to anything that may twang my emotions.”” Stuart Wilde in ‘Life Was Never Meant To Be A Struggle’
ss by Deepak Chopra

“I can’t emphasize this strongly enough… If you haven’t been able to feel how you want to feel and haven’t been able to get yourself to do something you want to do… then you are being victimized by your own disempowering thoughts, beliefs and attitudes.” - Mike Brescia, President, Think Right Now International

life IS unfair, the trick is to find a way to enjoy the hand you are dealt. any parts of your life that can be improved, improve them and the parts you can’t improve learn to like or at least be ok with them.

There is a prayer called the serenity prayer,
you may or may not believe in God but you can’t doubt the valuable truth in it’s words:

God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference.

It is not supposed to be easy or fair… Cause through hardship you learn and gain experience, its just the way things are. You can’t change them.
You have to cherish each second of your life.. no matter how bad it might seem. If you find the strength to bring yourself up, then you are the king of the world ^^ Your own world..

Avalian wrote:
It is not supposed to be easy or fair… Cause through hardship you learn and gain experience, its just the way things are. You can’t change them.
You have to cherish each second of your life.. no matter how bad it might seem. If you find the strength to bring yourself up, then you are the king of the world ^^ Your own world..

Well,… It seems to me, life IS fair. It seems to me we Reap What We Sow, and many unwittingly sow the seeds and reality of discontent and misery.

I agree that we CAN learn thru hardship, but it seems to me, many don’t.

I don’t think we need to cherish every moment, tho’ that would be ideal.

But I agree that it’s possible to find your strength within and this, ultimately, leads to each person being king/queen of their world.

“With your thoughts you make your world.” The Buddha

“Your thoughts can imprison you, or set you free.” Susan Smith Jones PhD

“Hasn’t it been said in your scriptures, ‘Ye are gods.’?” Jesus