boyfriend help: A quick update on work and bad times for my best friend. - Help.com

A quick update on work and bad times for my best friend.

Both situations are a little… controversial to say the least!

(1) A girl who used to work with me recently left in tears, because the manager on duty pulled her hair. Uch! This happened during a very busy, sports-related event, so the drama really wasn’t needed! I am concerned that this will escalate into something bigger though, thus me writing this post. The girl in question is the daughter of one of our beer suppliers. Whether she was being sensitive, or whether the manager did indeed use too much force (I wouldn’t be surprised by either!) is not known, however Daddy may not see the other side of the story :/ The manager on duty asked for MY advice haha! I didn’t say anything and she panicked all day. Oh dear! To think these people are in charge. I dunno!

(2) If you have read any of my previous posts, you may be aware that my best girl friend currently lives with my ex boyfriend. It makes visits quite awkward, but more often than not she will come to me to avoid this. Recently, she asked to come to my flat for a chat and she seemed quite upset, so I invited her over. Turns out that my ex and his new girlfriend have started to bully her. I can understand that she wanted reassurance from me, but I could offer her little advice, since I don’t want to deal with either of these people. I felt upset because my friend should’ve known better than to live with this idiot, but also because she chose to come to me for advice in how to deal with these people. Maybe she’s run out of options? I can’t help her though. I refuse to get involved with these people again!

edit: My friend and my ex are not dating and have never dated, they just live together in a student flat, along with a few others. I thought I should mention this because people have gotten the wrong impression in several of my posts concerning these people :p

This open post was written 1 year, 2 months ago | V/U/S: 463, 4, 2 | Edit Post | Leave a reply | Report Post


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Since writing this post the tree has helped in 6 other users' posts within the last 4 days. the tree is a verified member, has been around for 1 year, 3 months and has 89 posts and 1,253 replies to their name.

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The Sherlockian offline Verified User (5 years, 1 month) Long Term User Shouts: 38 #
An Unknown Location | 1 year, 2 months ago (6 minutes after post)

In the first instance, there’s not really enough information to make a deduction. Why would a manager be pulling someone else’s hair? Unless a safety or self-defense issue was involved, e.g., pulling her by the hair so she wouldn’t fall into something, or pulling her hair as an act of bonafide self-defense, then the manager is guilty of battery and could be sued.

In the second instance, this is karma at work. Because your girl friend stupidly and selfishly dated your former boyfriend, she got what she deserved. Explain to her that you’re sorry, but that you tried to warn her, and that if the guy and his girlfriend are breaking the law–then the authorities should be notified. There’s not really anything you can do.

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the tree offline Verified User (1 year, 3 months) Long Term User Shouts: 4 #
An Undisclosed Location | 1 year, 2 months ago (11 minutes after post)

She got a few orders wrong, so the manager was explaining her mistakes to her. If she really did pull her hair, then obviously this was an overuse of force and should be dealt with, but I didn’t see it, so no comment. All I can say is that this manager in question is quite physical when she deals with staff i.e. she’ll hold your face when talking to you etc.

My friend isn’t dating him haha, she just happens to live with him and others. That’s the student way! I was angry that she chose to live with him after we split up, but then they grew to become close friends while we dated, so I didn’t mention it. You’ve basically summed up how I feel. I can support her and listen to her, but I can’t do anything about it!

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Help me with: Nosy people.

the tree edited this post 1 year, 2 months ago. Read the previous text »

A quick update on work and bad times for my best friend.
Both situations are a little… controversial to say the least!

(1) A girl who used to work with me recently left in tears, because the manager on duty pulled her hair. Uch! This happened during a very busy, sports-related event, so the drama really wasn’t needed! I am concerned that this will escalate into something bigger though, thus me writing this post. The girl in question is the daughter of one of our beer suppliers. Whether she was being sensitive, or whether the manager did indeed use too much force (I wouldn’t be surprised by either!) is not known, however Daddy may not see the other side of the story :/ The manager on duty asked for MY advice haha! I didn’t say anything and she panicked all day. Oh dear! To think these people are in charge. I dunno!

(2) If you have read any of my previous posts, you may be aware that my best girl friend currently lives with my ex boyfriend. It makes visits quite awkward, but more often than not she will come to me to avoid this. Recently, she asked to come to my flat for a chat and she seemed quite upset, so I invited her over. Turns out that my ex and his new girlfriend have started to bully her. I can understand that she wanted reassurance from me, but I could offer her little advice, since I don’t want to deal with either of these people. I felt upset because my friend should’ve known better than to live with this idiot, but also because she chose to come to me for advice in how to deal with these people. Maybe she’s run out of options? I can’t help her though. I refuse to get involved with these people again!

Help me with: Nosy people.
The Sherlockian offline Verified User (5 years, 1 month) Long Term User Shouts: 38 #
An Unknown Location | 1 year, 2 months ago (16 minutes after post)

Hmmmm . . . the manager is cruising for a lawsuit, or to be fired. You don’t “manhandle” employees in any way! ALL somebody has to do is send an anonymous note to HR, and they’ll investigate. When a number of people say, “Yes, she definitely does things like that, the manager will be fired. She needs to modify her management style right now!

Sounds like your friend had a choice to make and made the wrong one. Yes, she’s definitely getting pelted by a hail of karma! Bet she thought she could get him after the two of you broke up! And she got more than she bargained for! So, yes, just tell her, “I tried to warn you that the guy was a douche, but you didn’t believe me!”

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