Answer help: HELLO, Welcome to the Psychiatric Hotline! - Help.com
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HELLO, Welcome to the Psychiatric Hotline!
* If you are obsessive-compulsive, Please press 1 REPEATEDLY.
* If you are co-dependent, Please ask someone if it’s OK to press 2.
* If you have multiple personalities, please press 3, 4, 5 and 6.
* If you are paranoid-delusional, we know who you are and what you want. Just stay on the line so we can trace the call.
* If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a little voice will tell you which number to press.
* If you are manic-depressive, it doesn’t matter which number you press. No one will answer.
tanmaykumar4 wrote: you call this a humour. Do u even realise how much can it hurt someone with any of it. Try to have some sense in urself.
I don’t know about you, but I’m laughing my a$$ off!:D Every single one of us are laughing. 3333333333333333333333366666666666666666666666666664444444444444444444444444 444444444455555555555555555555555555555555511111111111111111111111111111111 111111111 (click)
tanmaykumar4 wrote: see big al one…. im not laughing bcoz i have had some of the depression in the past.. so i know how it feels when someone makes fun of ur problems… there is nothing more to it. Understand this.
And understand this - there is a difference between making fun of problems and making fun of a person. If you can’t make lite of the problems you have in life once in a while, then those problems have won.
And when you’re depressed, nothing seems funny, not even when it is.
So, then, should everyone be as depressed as you? Should there be nothing to even smile about? No. So, come here and laugh and enjoy yourself as the OP has intended or cry somewhere else. There’s nothing more to it.
tanmaykumar4 wrote: keep ur ego aside in this conversation. Besides what i said wasnt bcoz of me as it dusnt affect me as im way out of it now. But bcoz im concerned abt the ppl who r currently goin thru it. But ofcourse u won’t understand it bcoz i think u havent experienced it. So i can’t expect anything else from u. Good Luck.
Ego? Where? Statement is out of the blue.
And if you’re concerned about people who are going through depression, then, there are plenty of posts here at Help.com that you can talk to about it.
. . .And please, don’t ASSUME those things that I have or haven’t gone through.
And, no, you may NOT expect anything else from me here.
I’ll see you on the grid.
All my best:D
tanmaykumar4 wrote: assuming? lukin at the replies u have given nothing else can be assumed. People like me are always eager to help others… unlike you. U may see me anywhere, but i have already seen where u are. May God Bless ur soul. ;D
Okay, let’s get this strait, smart-mouth. You have been verified here for just over an hour.
I have been a member here for nearly 2.5 years. . .
Now, for that whole hour you have been here, most of it has been spent trolling this post. While you have no idea as to the help I have given people here over the years, it is clear by your actions that you have helped no one.
I suggest you leave this post and get busy helping others.
tanmaykumar4 wrote: being for a longer time on a helping site doesnt mean u know more than me. U might be helping ppl thru this…. but i hav guided lots of ppl face 2 face whenever they hav asked for. I hav no offence against you. Besides i wasnt the 1 who started this conversation. U have no idea how greater and better help i can give. Now u don’t assume.
So, you’re a judge of intellect, now? Well, the one thing I have learned in life is that people rank themselves much higher than what they are. Clearly, you are not an acception to this mistake. And I am glad you you have personally helped and guided people in person. Keep up the good work, but don’t ASSUME that I, or anyone else, haven’t done the same thing. It dosen’t make you ‘better’ than everyone else.
(Oh, by the way, you can leave, now.)
. . .you live with your mom and dad.
I doubt you have a job and any real significant life experience - although I have gave you the benefit of the doubt. You continously claim how much better you are - and you are amazed by yourself. But, friend, you do not fly at the altitude you claim, and yes, you HAVE said it. I wonder how many homeless people you have sheltered and fed. Not too many while you live at home with mommy and daddy.
Get a job, boy.
And thank you for your permission. The difference between us is, I’m not asking.
I’m telling you to leave this post.
Is it your Post? What makes you so ENTITLED to come here and troll?
You are a troll.
Troll. Leave. Now.
Else, report U.
BuhBye.
Anonymous#
1 year, 2 months ago (1 hour, 33 minutes after post)
BIG AL ONE wrote: And understand this - there is a difference between making fun of problems and making fun of a person. …And when you’re depressed, nothing seems funny, not even when it is.
… So, come here and laugh and enjoy yourself as the OP has intended or cry somewhere else. There’s nothing more to it.
yup, agreed!
I’ve been through the wringer. I can finally laugh once in a while, but only when I press….goodness, it says not to press anything bc they’ll trace me. That’s totally me. and then press, wait, it says that it doesn’t matter what I press, that nobody will answer.
I’m not making fun of others. I know the pain. I’m trying to laugh my way through it for once. Give it a try.
BIG AL ONE wrote: And understand this - there is a difference between making fun of problems and making fun of a person. …And when you’re depressed, nothing seems funny, not even when it is.
… So, come here and laugh and enjoy yourself as the OP has intended or cry somewhere else. There’s nothing more to it.
yup, agreed!
I’ve been through the wringer. I can finally laugh once in a while, but only when I press….goodness, it says not to press anything bc they’ll trace me. That’s totally me. and then press, wait, it says that it doesn’t matter what I press, that nobody will answer.
I’m not making fun of others. I know the pain. I’m trying to laugh my way through it for once. Give it a try.
Anonymous#
1 year, 2 months ago (1 hour, 51 minutes after post)
Why are you turning this JOKE into a personal attack on somebody who’s been here forever? I like Big Al One. I’ve been here for probably as long as he has. Don’t turn this personal. That’s not fair. Totally ruins the post. Add you own joke. That might be better.
Anonymous wrote: Why are you turning this JOKE into a personal attack on somebody who’s been here forever? I like Big Al One. I’ve been here for probably as long as he has. Don’t turn this personal. That’s not fair. Totally ruins the post. Add you own joke. That might be better.
OP Anonymous, I think you had a wonderful idea for this post.
I’m sorry for ‘feeding the troll’ and ruining your post.
Perhaps soon, you can try this again, hopefully with better results.
Normally, I don’t make such suggestons, but perhaps you could close this
post and try again soon.
Thank you.
All my best.
:)
Anonymous#
1 year, 2 months ago (2 hours, 4 minutes after post)
BIG AL ONE wrote:
Anonymous wrote: Why are you turning this JOKE into a personal attack on somebody who’s been here forever? I like Big Al One. I’ve been here for probably as long as he has. Don’t turn this personal. That’s not fair. Totally ruins the post. Add you own joke. That might be better.
OP Anonymous, I think you had a wonderful idea for this post.
I’m sorry for ‘feeding the troll’ and ruining your post.
Perhaps soon, you can try this again, hopefully with better results.
Normally, I don’t make such suggestons, but perhaps you could close this
post and try again soon.
Thank you.
All my best.
:)
thank you. :)
Anonymous#
1 year, 2 months ago (2 hours, 5 minutes after post)
Thanks, mindhealer. I don’t know you, but I ppreciate that.
If you’re lonely, press “1″ because it’s the loneliest number.
If you need homework help, press 4*5
If you need religion help, press 666
If you’re tired and sad, it’s okay, you don’t have to press a number, we’ll do it for you. :)
(”The number you have dialed canot be completed as dialed. Please dial again or ask your operator for assistance.”) (click)
(redial)
(”The number you have dialed -”) (click!)
RahhhhhhhhhhhhhhH!!!!
mindhealer wrote: If you’re easily offended by very mild humor, scream curses into the phone and throw it out the window.
Don’t confuse being offended with lack of self control and violent temper.
There are topics which are just not funny to some people, always consider that when joking about touchy subjects on the net.
This post is just like joking on what people with CP can’t do, for example. And then telling people suffering from CP to chill out when they get offended.
The posted joke sucks, it shouldn’t be told or written.
Well of course there are going to be jokes that not everyone finds funny, point out the bleeding obvious, but then they should just leave it. Humour is one of the few things in modern times that has no need for political correctness. This joke isn’t singling anyone in particular out and as someone who’s suffered mental issues I can honestly say I laughed my *** off at this. Get off your high horse.
heysnowwhite wrote: Well of course there are going to be jokes that not everyone finds funny, point out the bleeding obvious, but then they should just leave it.
Still, you don’t have to take them so seriously. People have problems, that’s the whole point. I reserve the right to laugh at every one of those problems.
heysnowwhite wrote: Well of course there are going to be jokes that not everyone finds funny, point out the bleeding obvious, but then they should just leave it.
Still, you don’t have to take them so seriously. People have problems, that’s the whole point. I reserve the right to laugh at every one of those problems.
if you actually read the rest of what i said you’ll see thats exactly what i said.
heysnowwhite wrote: Well of course there are going to be jokes that not everyone finds funny, point out the bleeding obvious, but then they should just leave it.
Still, you don’t have to take them so seriously. People have problems, that’s the whole point. I reserve the right to laugh at every one of those problems.
if you actually read the rest of what i said you’ll see thats exactly what i said.
It sounded like you were saying that people who can’t take a joke should just go away or something. Like there’s something wrong with them just for being humor-disabled.
heysnowwhite wrote: Well of course there are going to be jokes that not everyone finds funny, point out the bleeding obvious, but then they should just leave it.
Still, you don’t have to take them so seriously. People have problems, that’s the whole point. I reserve the right to laugh at every one of those problems.
if you actually read the rest of what i said you’ll see thats exactly what i said.
It sounded like you were saying that people who can’t take a joke should just go away or something. Like there’s something wrong with them just for being humor-disabled.
I meant that if its not your humour then just leave it be, don’t make a big deal about it and accept the fact that people are not making a direct joke at your expense and that sometimes the most difficult aspects of life are made easier with humour
heysnowwhite wrote: Well of course there are going to be jokes that not everyone finds funny, point out the bleeding obvious, but then they should just leave it.
Still, you don’t have to take them so seriously. People have problems, that’s the whole point. I reserve the right to laugh at every one of those problems.
if you actually read the rest of what i said you’ll see thats exactly what i said.
It sounded like you were saying that people who can’t take a joke should just go away or something. Like there’s something wrong with them just for being humor-disabled.
I meant that if its not your humour then just leave it be, don’t make a big deal about it and accept the fact that people are not making a direct joke at your expense and that sometimes the most difficult aspects of life are made easier with humour
Okay, I understand, but isn’t it at least slightly funny to suggest that the people who have a problem taking a joke should instead of pressing a number just yell offendedly into the phone? It seems logical to me.
There is actually a number you can dial to get this ‘hotline’, I find it hysterical. Really, I find laughing at serious problems to be the best way of getting through them. Who are you if you can’t laugh at the tough stuff? Many dark things have happened to me in my life, and I have been able to laugh at all of them at one point or another. Laughing sounds better a lot better than crying to me.
heysnowwhite wrote: Well of course there are going to be jokes that not everyone finds funny, point out the bleeding obvious, but then they should just leave it.
Still, you don’t have to take them so seriously. People have problems, that’s the whole point. I reserve the right to laugh at every one of those problems.
if you actually read the rest of what i said you’ll see thats exactly what i said.
It sounded like you were saying that people who can’t take a joke should just go away or something. Like there’s something wrong with them just for being humor-disabled.
I meant that if its not your humour then just leave it be, don’t make a big deal about it and accept the fact that people are not making a direct joke at your expense and that sometimes the most difficult aspects of life are made easier with humour
Okay, I understand, but isn’t it at least slightly funny to suggest that the people who have a problem taking a joke should instead of pressing a number just yell offendedly into the phone? It seems logical to me.
Where in my response did i say it wasn’t funny? In my first reply I said, i’d suffered from mental illnesses and found the joke hilarious, are you even reading what I’m saying?
Well to add my 5 pennies in what is becoming a discussion on offending people if I tell a risky joke and offend a few people I feel the onus is on me to shut my gob rather than tell people to get over themselves. Otherwise I’d appear a jackass.
I mean, if your laughing at someone, even if your not meaning offence and have good intentions going on just ruins what you’re trying to do. Basically, a jokes a joke and if someone starts getting uncomfortable just accept that and move on.
heysnowwhite wrote: Well of course there are going to be jokes that not everyone finds funny, point out the bleeding obvious, but then they should just leave it.
Still, you don’t have to take them so seriously. People have problems, that’s the whole point. I reserve the right to laugh at every one of those problems.
if you actually read the rest of what i said you’ll see thats exactly what i said.
It sounded like you were saying that people who can’t take a joke should just go away or something. Like there’s something wrong with them just for being humor-disabled.
I meant that if its not your humour then just leave it be, don’t make a big deal about it and accept the fact that people are not making a direct joke at your expense and that sometimes the most difficult aspects of life are made easier with humour
Okay, I understand, but isn’t it at least slightly funny to suggest that the people who have a problem taking a joke should instead of pressing a number just yell offendedly into the phone? It seems logical to me.
Where in my response did i say it wasn’t funny? In my first reply I said, i’d suffered from mental illnesses and found the joke hilarious, are you even reading what I’m saying?
I think a good rule of thumb might be, “Try to be helpful”. This is much less likely to risk offending than things like “Try to be funny” or “try to sound correct.” It is still possible to go wrong, but it’s just not so likely. If you make fun of someone’s deepest problems, there’s a good chance they’ll be hurt or offended. If you instead say, “How can I help?” then they have a chance to know you have good intentions.
I wrote and recorded the “Psychiatric Hotline” as a greeting on my home answering machine around 1984 while suffering from severe depression. At that point in my life I had been through years of psychiatric and psychological counseling. I had also been hospitalized several times with depression. In my opinion, if there is any gauge to determine whether you have recovered from a trauma, or from a time in your life you would rather forget, it is having the ability to look back on such times in your life with a sense of humor. Trust me, folks, I empathize fully with people who suffer from mental illness because I’ve been there. But I also believe that the world would be a much better place if people would not take every little thing that doesn’t go their way so blasted seriously. Come on, take a deep breath and just laugh. But if you really don’t like my sense of humor, just look elsewhere for something that amuses you.
domainname wrote: In my opinion, if there is any gauge to determine whether you have recovered from a trauma, or from a time in your life you would rather forget, it is having the ability to look back on such times in your life with a sense of humor.
That makes sense. I’m sure that most of us appreciate an insightful joke, but the degree to which people get it or not may say something about how well their sense of humor is functioning.
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