please please see a professional (shrink/psychiatrist/counsellor/therapist/whatever you wanna call them). i’ve a few cuts myself and i’m tellin ya it ain’t worth beatting the crap out of yourself like this.
I can’t talk to a professional…they intimidate me I even get nervous and intimidated by my dentist :/
I cut because of the hate….the scars are the price I pay for that momentary release :/
I have 19 cuts from tonight, 19 more for the collection…
I try and stop and I do for a long time then I just cave and do it again….I have since I was 16 (im now 19)
Potty ^^ wrote:
I can’t talk to a professional…they intimidate me I even get nervous and intimidated by my dentist :/
I cut because of the hate….the scars are the price I pay for that momentary release :/
I have 19 cuts from tonight, 19 more for the collection…
I try and stop and I do for a long time then I just cave and do it again….I have since I was 16 (im now 19)
and nobody notices?
As i said I live in a hooded top, long sleeves… two of my close friends know
dude, tell me about yourself. what are your feelings? why do you hate yourself so much? how do you feel when you cut yourself.
Anonymous
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1 year, 1 month ago (25 minutes after post)
I understand what your going through. at times cutting feels like a drug. Once you feel the relief it offers you never really quit. Every something goes wrong your mind always go back to how good and easy it was to turn emotional pain to physical pain. Its true that guys aren’t suppose to break but that doens’t mean we don’t have a breaking point.
Something will set me of crying, be it something little or something huge, then I shut off…I get mad….I turn it on myself….I find something usually a razor blade….I clean it….by this point im crying again….the first two or three cuts hurt…they are slow….they start to sting an the rest follow…one after another faster than the others not caring where I cut my arm….then after a few seconds or so I stop….then I cry as I watch the blood pool and sometimes drip from my arm….then the stinging kicks in and I lay back and embrace it…..I love the stinging….
I hate the way I look, all of it, I hate my life, my family only want me around when they are getting something out of me, I’m paranoid, Im lazy nothing motivates me, I honestly don’t know why I get out of bed on a morning….if not for a cheap belt that snapped two years ago I wouldn’t still be here….
Anonymous
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1 year, 1 month ago (34 minutes after post)
I felt the same way as you do. I was forced to get help and by that I mean hospitalized against my will. You don’t want that to happen. At some point you have to make a choice to either get help or live whats left of the life your living. Also this is just a rumor but i hear that the more you cut the more you lower your immune system and i’m inclined to belive it. Because I noticed that my right arm the one with the worse scars will go numb from time to time and I don’t know if I can fix it. I hope you get help before you get to the point of no return.
Potty ^^ wrote:
Something will set me of crying, be it something little or something huge, then I shut off…I get mad….I turn it on myself….I find something usually a razor blade….I clean it….by this point im crying again….the first two or three cuts hurt…they are slow….they start to sting an the rest follow…one after another faster than the others not caring where I cut my arm….then after a few seconds or so I stop….then I cry as I watch the blood pool and sometimes drip from my arm….then the stinging kicks in and I lay back and embrace it…..I love the stinging….
I hate the way I look, all of it, I hate my life, my family only want me around when they are getting something out of me, I’m paranoid, Im lazy nothing motivates me, I honestly don’t know why I get out of bed on a morning….if not for a cheap belt that snapped two years ago I wouldn’t still be here….
first up, good on you that you clean your razor before you cut yourself. you don’t really hate yourself do you? you have the feeling that you have the world on your shoulder and everybody is expecting something from you. but at the same time, you don’t really have anyone to talk to, turn to even have the slightest clue what you’re going through right now. am i getting warmer?
Kinda…iv never really had anyone to turn to except my girlfriend…but it looks like that’s falling apart too.
I do hate myself all I do is hurt those around me and push away the few people who offer to help….
I’m so close to just giving up…
Anonymous
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1 year, 1 month ago (39 minutes after post)
DON’T GIVE UP. if you give up, what would that do to the ppl that offer to help? I’m willing to bet they won’t be singing in sunshine
well, for all you know it might not be you. might just be genetics and there’s a way to know and to heal yourself but in order to do that just once, one time, go see a professional and find out. there’s nothing you gotta loose really.
Anonymous wrote:
DON’T GIVE UP. if you give up, what would that do to the ppl that offer to help? I’m willing to bet they won’t be singing in sunshine
That is the only thing stopping me giving up …
Anonymous
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1 year, 1 month ago (42 minutes after post)
then you have your first building block. now are you gonna sit there and stare at it or are you going to keep building from it?
I wouldn’t know where to start…I can’t see a professional….they make me worse before I even go in :/
Potty ^^ wrote:
I wouldn’t know where to start…I can’t see a professional….they make me worse before I even go in :/
why’s that?
Anonymous
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1 year, 1 month ago (45 minutes after post)
Potty ^^ wrote:
I wouldn’t know where to start…I can’t see a professional….they make me worse before I even go in :/
you technically have already started. Your here asking for help. talking about whats bothering you will help more then keeping it in
Thank you for just replying guys…it’s late (1.22am) and I’m at college in 8 hours so I should try and sleep…thanks for helping me calm down enough to sleep…I’ll message my friend tomorrow and talk to her since she offered to help and I trust her….thank you….
Anonymous
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1 year, 1 month ago (49 minutes after post)
Hey, When I see you, you’re getting a hug. A big one. Whether things are falling apart with H or not, you’ll ALWAYS have me, friend for life here! Tell me anything you can, and I’ll listen hun, i don’t want you bottling all this up :(
I’m here for you whenever you need me, don’t keep it all inside when I’m here :)
I’m sorry you feel like this! Try keeping elastic bands handy to replace the cutting when you feel the urge to cut yourself; try and lessen the danger to yourself. I know it’s hard to stop. I’m thinking positive thoughts for you, and if you need to talk about anything just shout
phoenix.j.ryde
Zirbel
Hazel_LeSquirrel
LittleBean