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It’s happened to me a lot.
not all at once.
but I’ve definitely had experiences where I’ve removed myself from my “normal life” and learned so much.

yeah
very much so.
especially when I lived away from home and in an environment that was totally unfamiliar to me.
and it taught me a lot about myself and what I still need to work on.
I still have a lot of work left to do.

As I said, you don’t suddenly see the light and things are good.
It comes in pieces.

I think spending time with yourself can teach you a lot and spending time with others can teach you a lot.

One of the wisest men ive know (my grandfather) use to joke that people do a lot of fancy things in order to find themselves when all they need to do is look in a merrier.

have you ever tried to find yourself?

are you happy with who you are?
I’m not.

what’s it like to have self-esteem?

Self esteem can’t be found on a trip; but a merrier might be useful.

am I being silly?

another thing is that sometimes we get too comfortable in our very limited little lives and sometimes really need to look outward.

mholmes77 wrote:
am I being silly?

another thing is that sometimes we get too comfortable in our very limited little lives and sometimes really need to look outward.

I don’t agree; I think some times we don’t see or forget how worth while our limited little lives really are.

a lot of times I feel my life is beyond useless.

You can find yourself whenever and where ever you want to. It seems easier to search for yourself traveling great distances to some new place away from the accustomed stuff than on your own bed, but when you do find yourself where you had least expected it to be you are amazed to realise the utility as well as the futility of your travels.

mholmes77 wrote:
a lot of times I feel my life is beyond useless.

I doubt that it is; just know your bringing some meaning to my life, even if it’s just a little, so beyond useless cant be true.

I know myself, I think.
I don’t think anyone else does though.

casie wrote:
Da11, please explain.
Mholmes, it seems silly to ask what its like since its something so very often talked about that’s all :) but i see what your saying with the “limited lives” argument.

Explain what Casie :) ?

sorry Idk but i will post here so i get all the updates of this post.

^_^

I might sound like a contradiction to what everyone else had said but I found myself losing myself when I’m spent too much time alone.

Ive put thought into analizing my life and so feel more in touch.

It’s the change in your surroundings and people that bring out personality traits you never knew you had - that’s how people ‘find’ themselves, by trying something new, being brave and welcoming new elements into their lives.

When you spend so much time in solitude.. you will understand your mind better. For a year all I did was numb myself, Block out everything.. including my own thoughts. When I was presented with a situation that I had no answers for I, of course, just thought to push it to the back of my mind just a I had done with everything else. But a person can’t be silenced like a bad thought. And the questions.. They forced me to confront what I had tried so hard to distance myself from. Because the answers are in your mind. So yes, if you sit there and contemplate your thoughts for days upon days without ever resting or speaking to another soul.. you will “find yourself” But such a “spiritual journey” does not always end peaceful.

I think that the reason people ‘’find themselves'’ when they travel is because you learn about what kind of person you are by how you react to situations. I think challenging yourself to leave your comfort zone and succeeding can boost your confidence and help you realise your potential. Plus seeing different cultures and meeting different people to yourself tends to make you understand that the world’s a pretty big place and to become really aware of your views and the impact your culture had on you.

In terms of being on your own..
I personally think you learn the most about yourself through how you react with other people and don’t think I could find myself by sitting thinking all the time. But it would be helpful maybe to deciding what you want in life.
I think rather than taking a spiritual quest or something, allocating a half hour a day to just sitting and reflecting on your life would be a great way to get perspective and help you discover and stick to your priorities.

Yes, but it’s not something I can create for myself. Like I can’t just say “I’m going to go find myself.” Rather it is Gods Grace stepping in to help me find myself so I don’t think it’s an appointment I make for myself it more of God intervening.

casie wrote:
no and i don’t really care to at this moment, i just thought it might help since ive been really needing a big change in my habits. i thought maybe getting away would help.
i once took a very unexpected visit to waco texas. that was once of the happiest memories i have :) whenever i go somewhere new i love it so..yeah it was just a thought.

going some place and having a great time is not really a spiritual journey. a spiritual journey requires something more than that. people all over the world are always coming and going, but finding yourself is a challenge that few have the patience to do.

I’m not really sure if the words “finding yourself” really mean the same things to all the people here using them.

30thriving wrote:
It’s the change in your surroundings and people that bring out personality traits you never knew you had - that’s how people ‘find’ themselves, by trying something new, being brave and welcoming new elements into their lives.

interesting. you describe the process of learning and equate this to finding yourself. but the funny thing is this, if you are always changing, how can you find yourself? lol.

U2 wrote:
I have climbed highest mountains
I have run through the fields
Only to be with you
Only to be with you

I have run, I have crawled
I have scaled these city walls
These city walls
Only to be with you

But I still haven’t found what I’m looking for
But I still haven’t found what I’m looking for

jryley wrote:
I always find myself when I travel, and eventually lose myself at some point when I return home…

I feel similarly..
Its like I fall back into bad habit and a lazy monotonous routine.

mholmes77 wrote:
am I being silly?

another thing is that sometimes we get too comfortable in our very limited little lives and sometimes really need to look outward.

Or inward.

mholmes77 wrote:
I know myself, I think.
I don’t think anyone else does though.

You mean you don’t think anyone else knows you?

I don’t think anyone really knows me
I think a big part of that is that I don’t think that anyone would really want to know me.

do you ever feel trapped?

One advantage of finding yourself is that then you can select words to describe yourself in a profile blurb, and then other people will learn about you too when they click to see your profile.

is that directed towards me?

mholmes77 wrote:
do you ever feel trapped?

yes

I feel trapped every day. I don’t know how to break out of it

Describe …

I’ve just been so stuck in a routine that there’s no way out right now.

I need to try new things. really everything I do has been done before many times.
I need to experience something new and full of wonder.
sometimes I wonder if things will ever change.

I’m at an age now where people are changing a lot.

and I’ve been the same, and everyone else has grown and progressed.

for me, yes.

but i’ve met dozens of people who boast of their travels but return back each time no wiser or worldly than before. lame.

Being the same doesn’t necessarily mean you’re not growing, or “progressing.” Sometimes changes don’t show for a while.

I know for sure that I’m not progressing.
I see people the same age as me doing so much.
and I’m still the same child.

mholmes77 wrote:
… and I’m still the same child.

That is a good thing. You don’t ever have to give that up. Sez I.

why is that?

When you’re in a realtionship, or involved with the rush of life, you are not given the time to truely discover those things about yourself you could not know unless given the solitude of time to make those discoveries.
Once emersed for a length of time, the meaning of the things you once thought, change in the face of a plastic world.

mholmes77 wrote:
why is that?

Because I think it is the real, original part of you that should never die.

I agree.

But I’d like to have the adult part of myself too.

True and well said.

Rosabella wrote:
True and well said.

regarding Big Al’s quote:

“When you’re in a realtionship, or involved with the rush of life, you are not given the time to truely discover those things about yourself you could not know unless given the solitude of time to make those discoveries.
Once emersed for a length of time, the meaning of the things you once thought, change in the face of a plastic world.”

I need to become a more complete person, if that makes sense.

mholmes77 wrote:
I agree.

But I’d like to have the adult part of myself too.

Why don’t you think you do?

What is lacking, I mean.

because I don’t feel that way.
and I know I’m a child.
and I feel a child around people my age.

a child, or childish?

both.

Maybe you’ve just gotten caught in a role.

what do you mean?

Well, you “feel” you’re being childish in a certain situation, and then it happens again - you feel childish again, and then again .. And then you think “I’m childish!” When all it means is, yes of course we’re all still forever childish in some part of our selves & brains, until we finally get everything ironed out and understood and seen. I love the moments when I understand.

Mind you, I’m throwing words out here and don’t feel entirely accountable for all of them :)

Rosabella wrote:
Maybe you’ve just gotten caught in a role.

mholmes77 wrote:
what do you mean?

Rosabella wrote:
Well, you “feel” you’re being childish in a certain situation, and then it happens again - you feel childish again, and then again .. And then you think “I’m childish!” When all it means is, yes of course we’re all still forever childish in some part of our selves & brains, until we finally get everything ironed out and understood and seen. I love the moments when I understand.
Mind you, I’m throwing words out here and don’t feel entirely accountable for all of them :)

Caught in a role is a fine term. If you haven’t taken a seated position before you enter the arena, then it is often you are thrown into the chair of stupidity wearing the dunce-cap.
When it comes to social interaction, I don’t always speak. I look, I listen. And those things I look and listen for is someone that has the zeal to speak correctly about the issue at hand. If this is the case, I have little or nothing to say. But, if there is no one, I will speak what is necessary. I will not be viewed as a child, nor will I go to my room.

:)

When I feel like its time for a change or there is an event forcing me to change and I have not sure what the next steps should be…
Taking a step back, getting out of my usual world… makes a huge positive difference!
Like when I got done with my undergrad, I was in two minds to either follow the crowd or do something different… decided on the latter, but had no idea where to begin, so I just packed my bags, moved out of my place and travelled abit trying to experience new things, helped me put a much better perspective on what I wanted to do and how to do it!

Simply put we are gods in the making.Most of us don’t realize this fact.
Us as little gods are one and the same with the big God.Co-creators.

we are but a mer reflection of the experiences that we had and our life is a mer reflection of the choices we had made…. the truth about who we are , is that its a tendency and not a final destination, meaning that we are ever change… every day am a new person, learn from yesterday…

There is no you that you would be searching for, there is a person that you have become due to your environment and how you reacted to it… you look at the past and try to understand yourself and by looking at others you understand them by understanding them, you understand yourself…

its hard to look at yourself with total, objectivity… so its easier to look at others and point their problem and then u get some hits that you might be in a similar boat…

the core of man’s spirit comes from new experiences :)

life is about both finding urself and making yourself who you want to be…

The first realization of a warrior is not knowing :D

Wow..this is still the most popular post.
I don’t need to find myself by the way.
Finding others that add value to my life or theirs is more pleasant:)

you find yourself by leaving your comfort zone. How that is done is up to you. It will change you as well.

spiratec9 wrote:
Simply put we are gods in the making.Most of us don’t realize this fact.
Us as little gods are one and the same with the big God.Co-creators.

Profound

mindhealer wrote:
One advantage of finding yourself is that then you can select words to describe yourself in a profile blurb, and then other people will learn about you too when they click to see your profile.

also when someone asks me “who the hell are you?”… I don’t have a panic attack anymore.

Talking Heads wrote:
and you may find yourself living in a shotgun shack
and you may find yourself in another part of the world
and you may find yourself behind the wheel of a large automobile
and you may find yourself in a beautiful house, with a beautiful wife
and you may ask yourself: well? how did i get here?

The Who wrote:
I’ve looked under chairs
I’ve looked under tables
I try to find the key
To fifty million fables

They call me the Seeker
I’ve been searching low and high
I won’t find what I’m after
Till the day I die

I asked Bobby Dylan
I asked the Beatles
I asked Timothy Leary
But he didn’t help me either

They call me the Seeker
I’ve been searching low and high
I won’t find what I’m after
Till the day I die

And you may ask yourself
What is that beautiful house?
And you may ask yourself
Where does that highway go?
And you may ask yourself
Am i right?…am i wrong?
And you may tell yourself
My god!…what have i done?

there is this idea that the self is something that can found and lost and this is kind of silly, right? but then why do we have this idea?