This post left anonymously
Was I in the wrong?
Reason to be mad at me?
As a Christmas gift, I got my mom two tickets to her favorite singer (it was heart warming the way she reacted when she opened the gift). I enjoy the singer too, but not enough to see in concert (especially where it’s a “seated” concert). I knew that her friend/boyfriend also really likes the singer so my intent was for her to ask him to go, which she was going to until she got her **** up in the air over something he did or said, so she didn’t end up asking him for a month or so.
When she did ask him, he had already got tickets to go with his daughter, so my mom asked me which I let her know that I wasn’t that interested since I hate sitting for that long. The concert wasn’t for another two months or more, giving her plenty of time to find someone else as I had said for her to take anyone. But she left it until the last minute to ask anyone, which she did ask a couple who also couldn’t/didn’t want to go. A few days till the concert, I said if no one will go then I would of course go (it would be a good show after all).
So on the day of the concert, I get home with plenty of time to be ready for our ride (which we got there with almost two hours to spare) but she’s still freaking that they’ll be waiting for us downstairs. So I got changed in a pair of jeans and a t-shirt, which my mom flips on me for wearing. She said to me that I wasn’t going like that and to put on my dress shirt, which I objected - 1, it’s not a “dress up” event, 2, I have no dress pants to go with the shirt, nor shoes, 3, why should she dictate to me how I dress? I’m 26 years old. And being a country music concert, I thought my jeans, t-shirt and leather jacket looked more appropriate for it. And the other thing she freaked on me for was not doing my hair, which I never “do” my hair (with gel I mean) and I was going to wear my hat (which I wear everywhere, but not inside the building, I do have some moral and respect). So with her freak out, she insulted me and then said never to buy her tickets again (which I won’t). So that pretty much ruined the night for me and my mom, which even though I didn’t want to go, I was still planning on enjoying the show. And then of course after we arrive to the concert with her friend and daughter (they were our ride), she ridicules me in front of them, further putting me down.
(Need I mention, they weren’t all that “dressed” up either, which is the only reason why she wanted me to be, to impress her boyfriend - she won’t even let him come in if there’s a few dishes in the sink because his apartment is so tidy - but we can’t afford a pristine palace like he does).
So in the hour and a half we all had to kill, sitting at the coffee shop, I didn’t say a word (since I felt shunned) while they all gabbed and then the rest of the night, my mom and I barely spoke to each other and even now, two days later, few words are spoken because I feel ridiculed and disapproved of. I know she still enjoyed the show (not as much as she probably would have without the argument) and I did enjoy it too.
But I feel really bad for us arguing and ruining the night, but I don’t know if I should or not? I don’t dress to impress everyone, least of all her friends. Plus, I’ve never done anything to make my mom mad, never. Never been in any sort of trouble (whereas my older brother and sister have been with school, police, money, etc.) So I don’t know why she treated me like that.
Since writing this post Anonymous may have helped people, but has not within the last 4 days.
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