This post left anonymously
When there is no hope left, what do you do? When it gets to the point where you don’t even want to be happy, you just want to stop being miserable. What do you do when you have hit that point where you realize that things aren’t getting better it’s all just barely starting to fall apart?
The future doesn’t have anything to offer me. I thought it was because of one mistake, but I was ruining my life before that.
I hit every statistic
Didn’t do well in school
didn’t complete college
arrested before 21
in tons of debt
working a dead end job.
It finally occurred to me that things are not going to get better. It’s going to be the same mistakes repeated over and over until sooner or later I die. No matter what choice I make, the outcome is always the same.
Some say turn to God. Tried that, and honestly, if He was real, why would I turn to him now? After 23 years of nothing, why do I think it’d be any different? I’ve heard people say that you’re still alive, and that that in itself is a blessing. Not when being alive is the last thing you want.
You know what my favorite part of the day is? When I fall asleep, because there is always that possibility that I wont wake up. If God is real, and is a merciful, generous God, then he wouldn’t let me wake up. He wouldn’t think it is okay for his “child” to walk around feeling so miserable all the time.
What do you do when you’re only option left is suicide?
Since writing this post Anonymous may have helped people, but has not within the last 4 days.
Invite Others to Help
A logged in and verified Help.com member has the ability to setup a Friends List and invite others to help with posts.