This post left anonymously
I am trapped.
I am 17 years old, and if you showed me someone 5 or 6 years ago with procrastination and depression I would have thought they were just being pathetic.
It is utterly pathetic, but I can no longer force myself to complete proper tasks, unless they are small and physical. A while ago I wrote a long list of things I would love to be able to do and even though i want it so bad it’s like I can’t even control my own willpower. I have lost confidence in everything and spend a lot of time silently thinking disturbing and depressing thoughts which I cannot get to go away. My life shouldn’t feel awful. The only bad thing is I don’t have as much money as everyone else around me, which actually has a huge affect when growing up on skills you develop and people you get to know. But I don’t understand where these problems have come from and they don’t feel right.
I don’t understand how this works. It has been a growing problem for the last 4 years, and I am tired of having to hide it from everyone. I want to find a way to stop these problems so that I can be happy, but I can’t do it alone, and I don’t know where to get help.
No-one I know personally can know about the problems I have, as human nature dictates a certain prejudice towards people who have these problems. I need someone, something or someway to recover that I can access, and then I can get my life back on track.
Since writing this post Anonymous may have helped people, but has not within the last 4 days.
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