Special help: please tell me what you think!

julie

please tell me what you think!

is this a terrible email to send to my ex?

There was still more I wanted to say to you, but I know texting isn’t the best way, and I didn’t want to call already so soon, so hopefully this doesn’t drive you crazy!
I still love you so much and you mean so much to me, and I hope someday we can work this out. I’m going to try my hardest to not be so impatient and give you the time that you need. I feel like I’m growing, at least in self awareness and have realized more than a couple of things that I’d like to work on since we’ve broken up. I want to be better, for you and for myself. I’m sorry I acted so lackadaisical and took things for granted, especially for the last month or so that we were together. I regret that so much, the last thing I wanted was to lose you, and I feel like I wasted so much time being pessimistic and lazy, and acting like a spoiled brat. I want you to desire me the way I desire you, and I realize that I can’t force that, or make it happen by request. I just really wanted to explain a little more where my thoughts are, because whenever I talk on the phone I get nervous and either fumble with what I’m trying to say or leave it out all together. I’m hoping this email doesn’t come across as too needy or forceful, I just felt like I needed to say more to you. It’s funny, even though these last few weeks have been so bad between us, I still smile when I think of something special or (no offense) some little quirk or silly thing I’ve noticed about you…that’s one of the reasons that I know I love you and it is something special. That might sound insignificant, but I think it means something. Anyway, I hope I hear from you soon.

This open post was written 11 months, 4 weeks ago | V/U/S: 463, 17, 5 | Edit Post | Leave a reply | Report Post

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Since writing this post julie may have helped people, but has not within the last 4 days. julie is not a verified member, has been around for 11 months, 4 weeks and has 2 posts and 7 replies to their name.

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insignificant, Get Nervous, Awareness, Terrible, Reasons, Offense, growing, Special, Request, Regret (How Tags Affect Reciprocity)

Replies (17)

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verge 134 #
An Unknown Location | 11 months, 4 weeks ago (25 minutes after post)

I don’t know. It was definitely sweet and well worded, but if he left you and told you that he wasn’t coming back, that email would just make things harder for the both of you.

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karnation159 1 #
An Unknown Location | 11 months, 3 weeks ago (1 hour, 27 minutes after post)

It depends. Who broke up with who? And how old are you?

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julie #
An Unknown Location | 11 months, 3 weeks ago (7 hours, 10 minutes after post)

He broke up with me, but he did say that it was a possibility that we’d get back together. It’s all kind of up in the air right now, I guess and he needs space. I moved away and probably won’t see him all summer. We’re in our 20s. Even though he left me, I just wanted him to know exactly where I stand. I hope this wasn’t a mistake..

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southern_comfort 178 #
An Undisclosed Location | 11 months, 3 weeks ago (7 hours, 32 minutes after post)

Have you sent it yet?

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southern_comfort 178 #
An Undisclosed Location | 11 months, 3 weeks ago (7 hours, 38 minutes after post)

If you haven’t sent it, don’t.

If you have sent it than what I have to say is moot.

Help me with: News Flash: Lady Gaga is the new Godmother of “The Queen of England’s” newly adopted son.

julie #
An Unknown Location | 11 months, 3 weeks ago (7 hours, 43 minutes after post)

i have sent it….is it really that bad?

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southern_comfort 178 #
An Undisclosed Location | 11 months, 3 weeks ago (7 hours, 51 minutes after post)

Reread it. Look at how many “I”s are in it. Despite what has transpired in the relationship you seem to want to make it about YOUR wants and YOUR needs. What about his wants and needs? I think that is why he broke up with you, sweetie. It was too unbalanced in your favor.

Rewrite it again this time focusing on what he told you. Make him understand that you know what is wrong and that it IS fixable. But HE needs to know that you understand him. Right now you clearly don’t.

Help me with: News Flash: Lady Gaga is the new Godmother of “The Queen of England’s” newly adopted son.

southern_comfort 178 #
An Undisclosed Location | 11 months, 3 weeks ago (8 hours, 5 minutes after post)

You said “I don’t want to call you”.
Since you already sent the email I would rethink that.

Help me with: News Flash: Lady Gaga is the new Godmother of “The Queen of England’s” newly adopted son.

verge 134 #
An Unknown Location | 11 months, 3 weeks ago (16 hours, 41 minutes after post)

I really don’t think it is that bad. What is done is done, ball is his court, don’t bother him again. The letter was pretty sweet.

Help me with: What if we knew that we were good?

julie #
An Unknown Location | 11 months, 3 weeks ago (17 hours, 1 minute after post)

I see what you’re saying, but all I can offer him is what “I” can change, and what “I” think I can improve on. He has a lot of criticisms on how I’ve acted in the past, so I am telling him how I feel, and what I want to change, and what I’ve noticed. He’s told me that he wants space, that I expect too much and then fly off the handle…that’s why I wrote this. He didn’t respond, so you’re probably right in thinking that I shouldn’t have sent it, but I did, and there isn’t much I can do about it now. It was done with good intentions..

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julie #
An Unknown Location | 11 months, 3 weeks ago (17 hours, 2 minutes after post)

verge wrote:
I really don’t think it is that bad. What is done is done, ball is his court, don’t bother him again. The letter was pretty sweet.

Thanks! I didn’t mean for it to be all about me, I just wanted to express myself and make sure he knew how I was feeling.

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julie #
An Unknown Location | 11 months, 3 weeks ago (19 hours, 56 minutes after post)

I wish you guys were online right now.. I sent him a text earlier today asking if the email was too much. he responded just a few minutes ago that it wasn’t too much but it does through him through a loop. i asked what kind of a loop? but he hasn’t responded…

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verge 134 #
An Unknown Location | 11 months, 3 weeks ago (20 hours, 2 minutes after post)

I really think you should leave him to the letter and stop talking to him until he initiates conversation. Nothing you say can help your case except the letter, it will only distract him, and make you look desperate and needy. Now don’t fret. Just hang in there and don’t talk to him.

Help me with: What if we knew that we were good?

julie #
An Unknown Location | 11 months, 3 weeks ago (20 hours, 10 minutes after post)

i agree! i’m not going to anymore, but he’s gotten annoyed with me in the past for writing sappy emails when he’s trying to clear his head, so i wanted to make sure that this one wasn’t too much…

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julie #
An Unknown Location | 11 months, 3 weeks ago (20 hours, 10 minutes after post)

i wonder what he means though that it threw him through a loop

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verge 134 #
An Unknown Location | 11 months, 3 weeks ago (20 hours, 15 minutes after post)

You’ll have to accept that you might never know :)

Help me with: What if we knew that we were good?

julie #
An Unknown Location | 11 months, 3 weeks ago (2 days, 15 hours after post)

Well he actually responded positively to it. We talked last night and he said that he was glad that I felt that way about him and that he misses me…he said he needs some time to be himself again and we agreed to give each other some time and space to improve ourselves. i told him to just tell me if he feels like it just isn’t going to happen for us, or if he falls for someone else, so that i know not to wait and he agreed and asked me to do the same. so we’ll see how it goes… but overall i think it was good that i wrote this!

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