friends help: I just need someone’s opinions/ideas on this.. - Help.com



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I just need someone’s opinions/ideas on this..

I am a 16 year old girl finishing my sophomore year of high school and the other day my friend was helping me study for finals. He is 19 and he just finished his junior year or college. We are exactly 2 1/2 years apart (his birthday is a week after my half birthday). Anyway, we took a study break and he kissed me. We both enjoyed it..but he said I couldn’t tell anyone. He said the age difference and the lifestyle differences at this point in our lives was too much. He told me it would be different if i was older..I understand completely because I was talking to a 20 year old earlier this year and we were both getting a lot of flak about it (I have known him for four years and people have never approved of us). But I know that most people think wanting to keep a relationship/hookup/whatever secret is a bad sign…we have known each other for four years though through a club we are both in and I had a crush on him the first two years. Last year we had a couple classes together (mixed classes though, we’re both very smart) and we started becoming closer. This year when he was at school we would talk and we started flirting more and my crush on him sort of came back… I just feel like because we have been close for a while I’m not just some girl to him, but it just confuses me because he doesn’t want anyone to know. I get that the age difference is a big part of it, but I just wanted to maybe hear someone else’s opinion without going against my word and telling all of my friends!

This open post was written 11 months, 3 weeks ago | V/U/S: 293, 4, 3 | Edit Post | Leave a reply | Report Post


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ilivelife offline Verified User (1 year, 9 months) Long Term User Shouts: 11 #
An Unknown Location | 11 months, 3 weeks ago (13 minutes after post)

So was it just a kiss, and it is the kiss he wants you to keep secret, or are you now going to start dating, and it is that he wants to keep secret?

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Anonymous #
11 months, 3 weeks ago (31 minutes after post)

Well at the moment anyway..just the kissing and hand holding.

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ilivelife offline Verified User (1 year, 9 months) Long Term User Shouts: 11 #
An Unknown Location | 11 months, 3 weeks ago (52 minutes after post)

So did that happen just the once while you were studying or is it now an ongoing thing?

Basically if it was a one-off and he thinks it was a mistake, then respect his wishes and keep it quiet, and accept nothing is going to happen between you.

If it is an ongoing thing, you need to decide whether you are happy being someone’s little secret.

I wouldn’t be, and I don’t think it is a very promising start to any kind of relationship.

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Kelvin_nesh offline Verified User (11 months, 3 weeks) Long Term User Shouts: 0 #
An Unknown Location | 11 months, 3 weeks ago (1 hour, 21 minutes after post)

I would advice you to try a hard to get type of girl so as next time he tries anything he will know age is just a number and he must try her best to get you

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