Feel help: I was thinking. - Help.com

Well Dr, i think i will take you up on that offer as soon as i have better time tonight :)
Btw i didn’t mean physical address, more of a cyber thing. I am not so patient :P Even thou that would have been more fun.

You know what guys, since you two are the only once who seem to have replied this far i think i want to start the first post here.
Write and answer when ever you are online and have the time.

The first theme i want to discuss is:

-Pride

Mostly because i had a discussions just now with my parents about the meaning of pride. We were talking about what it means to have pride in one-self. My mom asked me if i had any pride in some of my actions which she obviously thinks are wrong.
This is what i found about the word pride in the English online dictionary :
pride,
noun
1.
a high or inordinate opinion of one’s own dignity, importance, merit, or superiority, whether as cherished in the mind or as displayed in bearing, conduct, etc.
2.
the state or feeling of being proud.
3.
a becoming or dignified sense of what is due to oneself or one’s position or character; self-respect; self-esteem.
4.
pleasure or satisfaction taken in something done by or belonging to oneself or believed to reflect credit upon oneself: civic pride.
5.
something that causes a person or persons to be proud: His art collection was the pride of the family

Now my mom being …. my mom just dropped the subject when i said yes and left.
And now i am sitting here and thinking about my answer. To be honest I don’t know if my answers was true. I just wanted her off my back… and being the smart-mouth that i am, i took the path of least resistance.

I don’t know how to take pride in my actions, when i know clearly this is NOT an action my parents would want me to take. We are all shaped by our parents views and values. So its easy to take pride in something that i know will make my parents proud, for example getting good grades at school. But when i go out drinking with friends despite my parents disapproval, i do not take pride in it.I have fun and get socially acceptance and other merits- yet i don’t take as much pride in this as i would if i knew those i care for also would take pride in my actions.So my pride is largely controlled by others I guess that’s why pride is called an emotion– no?

Now i know there are pros and cons to everything and maybe i dont take as much pride in that action because i know that the merits of one night out with friends are a lot less in the long run then the merits i get by listening to my parents?
But why then bother taking the action?

Does any of this make any sense to you?

Someone please give me some other angle on this matter, i feel like i am arguing in a circle with myself.

I do agree with you : pride is not just black and white. And eventually all you leave behind after your death is your carbon trail and the consequences of your actions and words.
You obviously live your life according to what makes you proud– and for you that is giving of yourself, no matter how people take what you give.
As a parent you have obviously other experiences then i do. I take great pride in only being able to support myself, not sure if i in my state of mind would be able to support others. I have never been put to the test.

What about national pride? or cultural pride? That is also linked very closely to personal pride. Growing up between two very different cultures and nations i have likes but i can’t say i have one culture or nation i have more pride in. Its hard having one foot in two different worlds :/
How do you think this shapes the mind of a child?

Doc?