Family help: How do you tell your dad about your moms gambling problem when you know if you tell him he will divorce her? - Help.com

Well what does Bob think is happening to his money?

im not sure but he gets annoyed when every week his visa is maxed out and it has a $7000 limit on it so ya i dont think he likes mom spending 7000 a week on “groceries” is good cause thats what my mother tell him shes spending the money one

Have you tried to get your mother help? Lots of people have gambling addictions.
I think if you are ready to face a future of potentially hostile relations with your mother, then you should tell Bob.

ya she is signed up with gamblers annon. but when she is supposed to go to the meetings she tells bob ok im going to the meeting now and then instead of going to it she goes to the lounge here and gambles more

I think he knows if your mom is telling him that she spends $7000 a week on groceries.

well its not all groceries but like at wal mart and other places that sell those cards… like we go to the grocery store maybe buy 20 bucks worth of actual groceries then like 5 of those cards then when we get home she makes me go get more grocery bags and put the empty bag on the ground to look like we bought a bunch of groceries and then she asks me chandra did you put the stuff in the freezer and i have to say ya and just ugh im so tired of lying to bob

Man she has issues. I’m sorry, but I would probably tell Bob. Only because I heard of someone losing everything to gambling and they didn’t want to tell their wife so they committed suicide. She needs to get help. You sound more responsible than her and she’s the mother. I mean if you don’t tell him this is going to continue and you will be put out on the streets. Maybe tell him not to tell her you said anything. Tell him you were scared to tell him, but you want to do what’s right.

ok but idk how to tell him.. he is a farmer so he is never in the house and my mom doesnt work so she is always here so when he comes in for meals shes always here i never get an opportunity to talk to him..plus he is very quiet and doesnt talk much so ya i dont know how to tell him

Honey I don’t know. I would not want to be in your situation. I just think it’s a lose, lose situation. You do what you feel you should do. No one can blame you because you are really in a bad situation. I would want to get your mom help and I think the only way is if Bob helps you. Tell him you need his help with her and you are scared. You are his daughter too. He will hopefully have compassion for you and help your mom.

thanks for the help guys :) hopefully all goes well