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Need some help!

My ex told me that he still loves me and misses me but wants space, and maybe we can work it out after a while. I’m going crazy. So far it’s only been 2 days that I’ve gone without talking to him, but I feel so tempted to call him. I’m with my friends, but he’s still just lingering in the back of my mind. What should I do? Does anyone have any advice? I don’t know why I’m so weak with him.

This open post was written 11 months, 1 week ago | V/U/S: 348, 16, 7 | Edit Post | Leave a reply | Report Post


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Since writing this post danica may have helped people, but has not within the last 4 days. danica is not a verified member, has been around for 11 months, 1 week and has 1 posts and 7 replies to their name.

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southern_comfort offline Verified User (7 years) Long Term User Shouts: 200 #
An Undisclosed Location | 11 months, 1 week ago (28 minutes after post)

“I want space” can mean many things but what it mainly is saying is I have something else I would rather be doing than be with you. That could be anything from flossing his teeth to sticking his big willy in as many new single women as possible. My apologies for being blunt.
If you are weak with him as hard as it may sound you need to move on. You need to value you. Plain and simple. Right now you are weak because you let him support you mentally. That wasn’t the case when you first met and you need that part of you back. It will never happen if you stay with him. It will be very similar to trying stop smoking. There will be a huge withdrawal period and gradually you learn to be strong in your own skin.

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Space Weaver offline Verified User (2 years) Long Term User Shouts: 15 #
An Undisclosed Location | 11 months, 1 week ago (33 minutes after post)

looks like you got to give him space, can’t force him to speak to you or he will start fussing. let him be for now and worry about him later

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windmills, offline Verified User (5 years, 5 months) Long Term User Shouts: 7 #
An Undisclosed Location | 11 months, 1 week ago (37 minutes after post)

My advice would be to give him the space he wants. If you love him, then you will respect his wishes. Be strong and resist the temptation to call him. Most importantly, do not live with any expectation of him returning to you or any delusion that he is the “only” guy for you. He’s your ex for a reason, and you’re no longer morally obligated to be faithful to him. You’re free to date whomever you please now, so do not let this mere hope of him coming back and things returning to the wonderful way they once were prevent you from living and enjoying your life.

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Help me with: Out of curiosity
danica offline Unverified User #
An Unknown Location | 11 months, 1 week ago (42 minutes after post)

I’ve been trying to occupy myself. i’ve made some new friends, i’ve been working full time.. he still creeps into my mind all of the time though and it bums me out or makes me really tempted to call him. what do i do about that? (besides staying busy) also, he occasionally calls or texts me…should i just ignore for a little bit?

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southern_comfort offline Verified User (7 years) Long Term User Shouts: 200 #
An Undisclosed Location | 11 months, 1 week ago (48 minutes after post)

Absolutely. You are a puppet. He is the puppeteer. If you don’t jump every time he commands you to little by little those strings of control break.

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Space Weaver offline Verified User (2 years) Long Term User Shouts: 15 #
An Undisclosed Location | 11 months, 1 week ago (57 minutes after post)

Yes stop paying attention to him. Your too obsessed with him and all it does is make you worry, there are better things to occupy yourself with. Love can always wait but not your life:)

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danica offline Unverified User #
An Unknown Location | 11 months, 1 week ago (57 minutes after post)

well i’m certainly going to try. granted it’s only day 2, but i’m going to really try to keep this up. at least for a week

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Space Weaver offline Verified User (2 years) Long Term User Shouts: 15 #
An Undisclosed Location | 11 months, 1 week ago (1 hour, 19 minutes after post)

no, don’t try, do. always stay focused on the things that are most important, everything else is…everything else.

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Positivemessylove offline Verified User (11 months, 1 week) Long Term User Shouts: 2 #
An Undisclosed Location | 11 months, 1 week ago (2 hours, 17 minutes after post)

Don’t call, don’t text him. Wait for him to call you. Just give him space, and in time he’ll come back. But don’t seem too eager, just be honest and calm, and things will probably get better!

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Help me with: What does it mean?
danica offline Unverified User #
An Unknown Location | 11 months, 1 week ago (8 hours, 37 minutes after post)

ok i’ll do. I just have this feeling in the pit of my stomach that he just won’t come back. i don’t know why i even care anymore, but i do.

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danica offline Unverified User #
An Unknown Location | 11 months, 1 week ago (1 day, 9 hours after post)

Yesterday I was on Facebook chat and he signed in and sent me an message that said hey. i miss you. i didn’t know if i should respond or ignore, so i ended up just signing off really fast. i’m not sure if that was the right thing to do..

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Space Weaver offline Verified User (2 years) Long Term User Shouts: 15 #
An Undisclosed Location | 11 months ago (2 days, 3 hours after post)

the less contact with him the better, you don’t have to have anything to do with him anymore. this is your life now and he’s not apart of it.

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danica offline Unverified User #
An Unknown Location | 11 months ago (3 days, 20 hours after post)

well, we just got off the phone, and i told him that i didn’t want to talk and be friends with him anymore, and that it just hurt me knowing that i felt that way about him and that he couldn’t reciprocate. he got snotty and ended up just saying fine then we won’t talk anymore, and hung up..

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southern_comfort offline Verified User (7 years) Long Term User Shouts: 200 #
An Undisclosed Location | 11 months ago (3 days, 20 hours after post)

Good. Hopefully that final string that he had attached to you just snapped.

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southern_comfort offline Verified User (7 years) Long Term User Shouts: 200 #
An Undisclosed Location | 11 months ago (3 days, 20 hours after post)

Your account has been deactivated twice Danica. Why not just verify your email? We don’t charge a dime to anybody.

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Space Weaver offline Verified User (2 years) Long Term User Shouts: 15 #
An Undisclosed Location | 11 months ago (4 days, 4 hours after post)

trust me you don’t need him, he’d just keep holding you back. sometimes what was good before isn’t what’s best now and if you keep holding onto things that are no good to you now that you know you should give up but don’t want to loose the good feeling then you will not be able to find happiness in the future.

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