I really want to, but I’ve never held one before. Fearing I might botch things up. >.>
I think if you both go at this 50/50, then it’s very possible it may work out.
I would certainly hope so, I’m ready to give my 50.
I kept assuring her that I would do everything I could to ensure the long-distance wouldn’t fall apart, but I don’t even know if she’s willing to. She’s doubting herself for her previous failure, and she told me she’s scared of them in general. I’ll talk to her later tonight about it I guess…
Thanks for replying, means a lot to me.
And, well, what do most long-distance couples do to keep that spark alive?
I have no idea, I wish I knew so I could tell you. I’ve never been in a successful short distance relationship lol. But I think it just takes commitment, loyalty, honesty, and the mutual and general desire to want to continue dating each other.
Shigaku wrote:
And, well, what do most long-distance couples do to keep that spark alive?
Well, Id like to formally Simon Cowell this one.
Ummm…
Ill just lay it to you straight.
How many relationships have you been in?
After all this time in relationships do you not know that being in a relationship is a lot of work?
Yes, it takes EFFORT to be in a relationship. And even the best conditions for a relationship has the odds stacked against it.
LOVE takes hard work.
LOVE is a choice.
LOVE is patient.
LOVE… WAITS…
Ouch roofdonkey, did you have to mention the last one?
If you truly care for her, you will wait for her.
Well sure… Right? Because you love her.
But heres the catch, Is it right for you to subject HER to wait for you?
This is a similiar post to one that i replied to recently.
One called “hopeless”
Well, no kidding.
Dude, let her go. Set her free.
If she belongs to you then she will come back.
If she doesnt then that proves that she never was yours.
Shigaku wrote:
After a B> week /B> in this new relationship…
Really…?
“I’m not sure what to do though. She told me that she wanted me to be happy, and find another girl better than her instead of trying to suffer. And it hurt me to hear that she thought she wasn’t good enough for me. “
i don’t know the girl or you but the “find another girl better than me ” = bullsh!t line… usually that the typical break up line
“you are really a wonderful guy and all girl wish they had you but i really can’t see us together, its not you, it me bla bla bla bla bla…..”
i’d say try to make it work if it doesn’t then it doesn’t :)…
i think if u really think she is really special and she thinks the same, it might work and you might find time to meet and stuff… i dont know… when there is a will there is some kind of a way… i think
@Roofdonkey
I appreciate the forthrightness there, and it is my second relationship. First one didn’t work out too well.
I don’t want her to wait for me. I want her to be happy, and live a life as well. And if that means letting her go, maybe I should. But I guess listening to my own reasoning proves to me that I’ve already chosen. I can’t stand not knowing if it could have worked out. Cutting her loose is the better thing to do, and before we go our own ways, I’ll see if I can change my mind. I’ll talk with her about this, thank you.
As for me, I think I’m the more independent one in the relationship, so I’m actually more worried about the effects of separating on her. She’s happier than she’s ever been in months, and I don’t want to just wrench it away from her.
@rtp
I already knew that she was pretty insecure. In any case, I shot that line down instantly, I told her that I wouldn’t do that. It is a danger sign though, I agree. :\
I’ll do my best and see if I can make it work out. I did promise to meet her during the winter break, so I guess not all is doomed.
Thanks for the input, I appreciate it.
Shigaku wrote:
@Roofdonkey
I appreciate the forthrightness there, and it is my second relationship. First one didn’t work out too well.
I don’t want her to wait for me. I want her to be happy, and live a life as well. And if that means letting her go, maybe I should. But I guess listening to my own reasoning proves to me that I’ve already chosen. I can’t stand not knowing if it could have worked out. Cutting her loose is the better thing to do, and before we go our own ways, I’ll see if I can change my mind. I’ll talk with her about this, thank you.
As for me, I think I’m the more independent one in the relationship, so I’m actually more worried about the effects of separating on her. She’s happier than she’s ever been in months, and I don’t want to just wrench it away from her.
@rtp
I already knew that she was pretty insecure. In any case, I shot that line down instantly, I told her that I wouldn’t do that. It is a danger sign though, I agree. :\
I’ll do my best and see if I can make it work out. I did promise to meet her during the winter break, so I guess not all is doomed.
Thanks for the input, I appreciate it.
May God give you wisdom.
@roofdonkey
I’m not sure if that comment was an insult or well-wisher, I’m sorry, could you clarify that?
I know I’m young, inexperienced, and probably blinded by love, but I’m still able to make a right decision.
Shigaku wrote:
@roofdonkey
I’m not sure if that comment was an insult or well-wisher, I’m sorry, could you clarify that?
I know I’m young, inexperienced, and probably blinded by love, but I’m still able to make a right decision.
That is certainly not an insult.
Im wishing you well.
Its just a fancy way of saying “Goodluck!”
Please, i invite you to review some of my replies and content.
You will see that i am not crass or rude or ever reply with bombastic sarcasm.
;o
@roofdonkey
Gaaah, I apologize for interpreting that wrong, I have a lot to learn. Forgive me, and thank you!
@Zirbel
I laughed a bit, 2 of the links you showed were ones I already read. But thanks for the other 4!
It’s only been a week, and you have two more months to go. Talk about it later; you should be surer of how you feel about each other then.
You’ll have to decide if your relationship is more of a summer fling or something more serious.
Now, in your situation I would probably give the relationship a chance, as long as the other person agrees. If one person doesn’t want to try long distance, it will not work out. Long distance requires both people to actively want to keep the relationship alive.
As for keeping the spark alive in a long distance relationship, you’ll need trust and contact. Communication and honesty key, but you knew that. It’s good to figure out times that fit both of your schedules so you can talk regularly. Video chatting is especially helpful.
Basically, I would try long distance. If either person loses interest or just isn’t feeling it anymore, he or she shouldn’t be afraid to talk about it.
And one more thing:
Shigaku wrote:
She’s happier than she’s ever been in months, and I don’t want to just wrench it away from her.
This kind of thinking is silly. Never, ever stay in a relationship only because you would feel bad ending it. Being in a relationship should not be a sacrifice you make to make someone else happy. It should be a mutual thing. Are you happy in this relationship?
I think you should try and make it work. Distance makes the heart grow fonder. If you really care about her you can make it work.
If you feel like a long distance relationship is something you can commit to and you want to have one with this girl, then by all means do so! Do not, however, commit to something that you are unwilling or unable to do. It will only hurt her in the long run and affect her ability to trust other guys in the future. There is truth to the phrase “Absence makes the heart grow fonder.” It is quite possible that being apart will only strengthen the bond between you two. Good luck!
Positivemessylove
roofdonkey
rtp
Zirbel
Little Geodudette
Dannielguerrero
melissa_vanwey