HAD A BAD DAY AGAIN SO UPSET
Just had such a **** day, in fact I’ve had so many I’ve lost count it’s not even funny anymore.
Suicide will never be an option for me, but some days I feel like I wish i could slip into a coma and not wake up for a month or so seriously if there was a sleeping pill strong enough to put me into a coma for a couple of weeks I’d ******* take it in a heartbeat because it’d be better than staying awake feeling like this.
So yeah my life is pretty much ****, I’m 21 and I should be popular but i’ve not even got 1 ******* friend to my name my supposed “mates” are all ******* let downs and I wish they’d die and go to hell, 1 mate of mine INSISTS on banging on and on and on about her boyfriend like he’s the best thing in the Universe when the prick forgot to wear a condom when he ****** her and 2 weeks ago she messaged me at 1AM with a pregnancy scare I feel like she’s bragging about him on purpose to try and upstage me with my boyfriend, I wrote on my BBM status (blackberry messenger for those that don’t know) that I was debating whether or not to invite my boyfriend to a small family BBQ next Firday it’s literally just my sister her boyfriend (i think of him as my brother in law) and my sister’s mate the reason i wrote I was debating this was because on Fridays he gets up at 4AM to go to work and finishes at 12PM the BBQ would prob start at 4 or 5 at the latest which would mean he’d prob have 4 maybe 3 hours of sleep so then the ******* immature ***** wrote “So happy that everyone in my family loves my boyfriend lol” which was blatantly aimed at me I’m so sick of her going on about him like he’s the best boyfriend when HE’S ******* NOT like I said he had sex with her without a condom and i know they’re not trying to conceive coz if they were why did she message me at 1AM panicking and asking for my advice? Earlier on today she also wrote like it’s some kind of joke her boyfriend said he wanted girls and a 3way I’m sorry they’ve been together a month and he wants a 3way? My boyfriend said that to me I would ******* slap him especially after 1 month and you can say about i’m being judgemental or w/e I’m not SHE IS because I messaged her about my doubts about my boyfriend 3 weeks ago (he’s my first boyfriend so doubts are natural at first because it was very confusing and idk if he liked me etc) and she said “Why are you with him if you don’t love him?” at the time I didn’t know what love was but now I know I do love him but ever since I’ve got a boyfriend it’s like she’s doing this pathetic little competition with me the “who’s boyfriends best” competition ergh no contest there love my boyfriend wouldn’t be ******* stupid enough to not wear protection during sex, he wouldn’t pressure me for a 3way and whatever job this ******* MUG works if he works at all coz he looks like he just came of the set of “Harry Brown” I can gurantee my boyfriend works a better job and gets paid more (getting up in the AM to work at a mall apparently earns you more money) and drives a better car so there you go competition over.
Oh yeah and to make matters worse and old friend of mine I met at a place where I worked (technically it wasn’t a job coz it was voluntary and I didn’t get paid it was in a charity shop) said we’d go out at some point just let her know so I asked her if she was out this weekend and she’s ******* IGNORED ME. SURPRISE SURPRISE! I don’t ******* get it anymore am I a horrible person? Am I a social retard? Why do people not want to be my friends? Anyone who says I’m not there for them is a ******* liar, i was there for my mate with her pregnancy scare, I’m always asking if my friends are ok when they write about their bad days or w/e on BBM. I’m just getting so sick of this, all I want is just ONE friend that is all
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