friends help: how to deal with people with humbleness?

This post left anonymously

how to deal with people with humbleness?

This open post was written 11 months, 3 weeks ago | V/U/S: 346, 8, 3 | Edit Post | Leave a reply | Report Post

Reciprocity (0)

Since writing this post Anonymous may have helped people, but has not within the last 4 days.

Post Tags (12)

relationship, feelings, Facebook, Comment, friends, She Was, Feeling, waiting, Status, False, Guilt, false hope (How Tags Affect Reciprocity)

Replies (8)

Where were you?

Click and drag to move the map around. FAQ: How we place people on this map »
You can also watch events on Help.com as they happen

Mouse over the map for 2 seconds to see an expanded, interactive view

NaTcOMan 1 #
An Unknown Location | 11 months, 3 weeks ago (11 minutes after post)

hey, how old are you? if you’re young what happened was probably a case of love sickness unless there’s an obvious reason why you lost interest in her. she’s just signaling that shes still interested even when she knows you called it off. heres what you can do.. if u ignore her.. she’ll fade.. if you want to stay friends.. just be the friendly bro .. and she’ll eventually get it.. and if the feelings for her start coming back.. stay friendly till she asks about the relationship status.. and give her an honest reason why it didn’t happen so fast (space etc.) hope this helps.

Help me with: what are the levels of rupaloke?

JulsMo9 0 #
An Unknown Location | 11 months, 3 weeks ago (18 minutes after post)

Ignoring her would only hurt her more…i think you should talk things out i mean let her know that you will be there for her but as a friend… just make sure to know how to talk to her sometimes we are deaf to the things we say and we send the wrong messege..you seem like a nice person i bealive you’ll find the right thing to do.

Help me with: What’s The Theme Song Of Your Life?

NaTcOMan 1 #
An Unknown Location | 11 months, 3 weeks ago (20 minutes after post)

choice is yours

Help me with: what are the levels of rupaloke?

Anonymous #
11 months, 3 weeks ago (28 minutes after post)

thank you…

the thing is that after we broke up, i told her that i will remain her friend because i care for her but if she chooses not to be friends with me that i will understand…she agreed to be friends with me….we stayed friends for about two months….during that two months after our break up, the only thing that has been happening is that for a week she’s ok being my friend but then after a week, she lashes out at me, blames me and argue with me because she is not getting the boyfriend love from me that she use to get before….then she apologizes and says she can be friends with me now….but the again the same thing happens…she lashes out and blames me….this happened countless number of times until the friendship was ruined and i had to take the initiative to break the friendship because i realized that she wasnt getting any better…she was actually getting worse when i was remaining friends with her

NaTcOMan 1 #
An Unknown Location | 11 months, 3 weeks ago (30 minutes after post)

why did you want to be friends instead?

Help me with: what are the levels of rupaloke?

Anonymous #
11 months, 3 weeks ago (34 minutes after post)

i stepped back because when i was with her, i was loosing all of my feelings for her…i couldnt help it…some of the things that i should mention is that she is too love dependent…it was like i had to be there with her almost all hours of the day and night…she was very needy….like when she texts me, if i dont reply withing a certain period of time, she wont get mad but she will bring up the topic like “what took you so long to reply?”….now dont get me wrong….i am not picking on her personality…..she is actually a very good girl…someone who is very humble and sincere….good at heart….i felt that she isnt the one for me and that i am not what she needs….so i felt that me being with her will actually prevent her from finding the one that will be a perfect fit for her…

NaTcOMan 1 #
An Unknown Location | 11 months, 3 weeks ago (38 minutes after post)

aight.. u have fear of commitment. understandable.. there are alot of free birds out there. ok, easy fix for you .. just talk to her.. dont promise anything.. and if she’s pushing you .. then you can get angry about it.. but remember.. dont be an *******. you have every right to be mad about it. if she cant accept that you rather be friends.. then its her loss

Help me with: what are the levels of rupaloke?

Anonymous edited this post 11 months, 2 weeks ago. Read the previous text »

hi guys..i need some help and advice..

there is this girl who ive been friends with for about two years….it was mostly friends via facebook because she lived back home…we have never met each other until august of 2011…this is when she came to the country for her studies and we met…..in november of 2011, i started to feel something for her…i liked her and i told her how i felt and it turned out that she felt the same and was just waiting for me to tell her….so the relationship started off good….we never got physical and it was never my intention…we made out(which all happened spontaneously)…..about two weeks into the relationship, i started to feel different….my feelings for her were changing and i couldnt help it…i knew she would be devastated when she would hear about it….but for me lying to her was not an option…..it wouldnt be fair to her and it wouldnt be fair to me….so i did the right thing and told her the truth…..she was really hurt and heart broken…..i understood her and i was very considerate of her feelings…like i would be there for her as a friend only but eventually with time, even the friendship got ruined because she wasnt getting the boyfriend love from me and she would always lash out at me…but even till today i still do not blame her for lashing out because i understood that she was in pain….

at some point i was dealing with the guilt of breaking her heart….i was feeling so guilty that i was forcing myself to feel something for her but it didnt work….

even till today i still have her on facebook….we dont talk at all….but on facebook, we have a lot of mutual friends…she is always having status about me that makes me believe that she is holding hope and waiting for me to return or w.e….and she is waiting for me to talk to her or send her a message..and whenever i would comment on a friend’s picture, she would like it…that sort of thing….

now i care for her as a friend…i really do…but after we broke up, i asked a friend how is she(the girl i went out with) doing, and my friend went and told her that i asked about her…and that created some kinda of hope for her making her think “ohh he still cares for me..he still loves me” which was basically a false hope….for me i only asked because i care as a friend but for her, she takes it way out of proportion…

my question is that when she has status about me on facebook or when she comments on pictures of me that my friends uploaded, and when she likes my comments or pictures, what should i do??….should i reply back to the comments or should i completely ignore it..i know that if i do anything like it, for her she would take it as false hope…because for me the last thing i want to do is to give her false hope…because i know how it feels when some1 give you false hope only to find out in the end that it was only because that person cared as a friend only…..

thank you for reading and hope you guys will be able to help me out…

Invite Others to Help

A logged in and verified Help.com member has the ability to setup a Friends List and invite others to help with posts.

friends help: how to deal with people with humbleness? - Help.com

how to deal with people with humbleness?

Reciprocity (0)

Post Tags (12)

Replies (8)

Invite Others to Help

Help.com Homepage