Love help: Should I let what others think of someone change my mind about being with them?

This post left anonymously

Should I let what others think of someone change my mind about being with them?

There are so many posts on here that start with ’so, yeah, there’s this guy…’ but i really can’t think of another way to start. So, yeah, there’s this guy…and we’ve been getting along amazingly recently after my friend introduced us. He’s really friendly, funny and I love hanging around with him; my friend is convinced that me and him should be together…and she’s been going on about this for ages.
Then last saturday I spent the whole day with him and our mates, and it was the best time I’ve had for a while - and towards the end we were like getting closer and closer, and we make each other laugh and I love his company…
So yeah. Preeety good day!!

Today he texts me to give me his number, and as i have no credit I ask my other mate to tell him I got his text, and then he replies saying ‘can you say i need to tell her something tomorrow’. So i get her to tell him to text me what he wanted to say. (…this is turning out really long-winded, I’m sorry!!)

Basically he tells me that he really likes me. (and i kinda like him too)
But at this point this friend says ‘Oh good - so he’s over me then?!?’.
One - she seems pretty relieved. Is he really that bad?
Two - how long ago did he like her??!?!?!!! Fickle, much!
Three - The way she was talking bout him after that kinda made me think that if I did go out with him, she would disapprove.

Do you think I should worry about other people’s opinons if I do tell him I like him?
You see, I let what others think get to me, and it can really change my mind on something like this.

Any help is much appreciated!!!!!!!!! Love you guys!!!!!!!! ;D

This open post was written 10 months, 3 weeks ago | V/U/S: 217, 7, 2 | Edit Post | Leave a reply | Report Post

Reciprocity (0)

Since writing this post Anonymous may have helped people, but has not within the last 4 days.

Post Tags (4)

texting, boyfriend, opinions, Love (How Tags Affect Reciprocity)

Replies (7)

Where were you?

Click and drag to move the map around. FAQ: How we place people on this map »
You can also watch events on Help.com as they happen

Mouse over the map for 2 seconds to see an expanded, interactive view

Anonymous edited this post 10 months, 3 weeks ago. Read the previous text »

Should I let what others think of someone change my mind about being with them?

There are so many posts on here that start with ’so, yeah, there’s this guy…’ but i really can’t think of another way to start. So, yeah, there’s this guy…and we’ve been getting along amazingly recently after my friend introduced us. He’s really friendly, funny and I love hanging around with him; my friend is convinced that me and him should be together…and she’s been going on about this for ages.
Then last saturday I spent the whole day with him and our mates, and it was the best time I’ve had for a while - and towards the end we were like getting closer and closer, and we make each other laugh and I love his company…
So yeah. Preeety good day!!

Today he texts me to give me his number, and as i have no credit I ask my other mate to tell him I got his text, and then he replies saying ‘can you say i need to tell her something tomorrow’. So i get her to tell him to text me what he wanted to say. (…this is turning out really long-winded, I’m sorry!!)

Basically he tells me that he really likes me. (and i kinda like him too)
But at this point this friend says ‘Oh good - so he’s over me then?!?’.
One - she seems pretty relieved. Is he really that bad?
Two - how long ago did he like her??!?!?!!! Fickle, much!
Three - The way she was talking bout him after that kinda made me think that if I did go out with him, she would disapprove.

Do you think I should worry about other people’s opinons if I do tell him I like him?
You see, I let what others think get to me, and it can really change my mind on something like this.

Any help is much appreciated!!!!!!!!! Love you guys!!!!!!!! ;D

Anonymous changed the tags on this post: they were "Hanging Around, like this, Good Day, Tomorrow, friendly, Saturday, Tell Him, Turning, company, She Was" 10 months, 3 weeks ago.

nolateri 1 #
An Unknown Location | 10 months, 3 weeks ago (27 minutes after post)

It is not fair to someone we meet to listen to what others have to say about them if it is not positive……your opionion of this person should be based off of what goes on between you and him PERIOD!

How would you feel if you found out that people you knew where going to him putting ideas in his head that were negative about you???

Wouldn’t feel good would it!

This exact thing has ruined so many relationships that could have worked out really good.

I believe and advise my own kids and close friends when they meet someone new they like to keep their friends out of it……and not to even share with your friends about what goes on between the two of them. I suggest for them to spend time with this person one and one and get to know them with out influences and comments from others.

One negative comment like what your friend made has already gotten you asking this question.

I would say if you want him to judge you by what others say then go ahead and judge him this way cause it won’t work for either of you. So no sense in trying.

Or you can spend time with him and decide what you think for yourself and not what others say.

A true friend “few and far between” would not say this to you….she obviously has selfish motives for doing so.

I say spend time with this guy and dump your friend!

She sounds jealous and a trouble maker and wouldn’t be suprised if he actually can’t stand her because he knows what she is like.

Good luck!

Help me with: Prayer’s for Hurrican Isaac:

helen424 0 #
An Unknown Location | 10 months, 3 weeks ago (40 minutes after post)

Thank you!! I’ve been thinking ever since that one day hanging around him that I wanted to meet up with him again - and you’ve convinced me thats the right thing to do. I’ve never been good on doing things with confidence, not caring what others are thinking. Some people think it’s shallow, considering I care so much bout what people think, but I’m getting better at not caring!

Thank you again…great advice. Although I’m not going to start a hate campaign against my mate, in her head she probably didn’t realise she’d said something to make me change my mind. She doesn’t even know about that I liked him!!

And I don’t wanna create myself an enemy. BUT I’m not gonna let what my friends and other people say cloud my judgement of him, so thank you for your amazing advice!!!!

Help me with: It just feels like there’s something wrong

helen424 0 #
An Unknown Location | 10 months, 3 weeks ago (42 minutes after post)

*she doesn’t even know that i liked him

(btw i wasnt meant to post the original post as annoymous, but yeah…)

Help me with: It just feels like there’s something wrong

nolateri 1 #
An Unknown Location | 10 months, 3 weeks ago (1 hour, 11 minutes after post)

Thats cool! And no worries…….I know I was a little harse on advising you to dump your friend.. lol but honestly this is one of my biggest no’s of what people do..

Have fun and enjoy! :)

Help me with: Prayer’s for Hurrican Isaac:

Leveler013 1 #
An Unknown Location | 10 months, 2 weeks ago (2 days, 9 hours after post)

I read the “title” of your post, and from that I have enough information to make my suggestion: No.

Help me with: Just wondering about this girl.

Invite Others to Help

A logged in and verified Help.com member has the ability to setup a Friends List and invite others to help with posts.

Love help: Should I let what others think of someone change my mind about being with them? - Help.com

Should I let what others think of someone change my mind about being with them?

Reciprocity (0)

Post Tags (4)

Replies (7)

Invite Others to Help

Help.com Homepage