boyfriend help: I’m not sure how to deal with my ex! - Help.com

Just say to him that you’re not together anymore but you hope you can be friends and wish him well if he gets too much delete him out of your life, block his number and and leave him too it seriously it’s his problem not yours, sounds like he needs help if he gets even worse just call the police because it’s harrassment.

Okay… This person is not even able to have a real relationships. It’s not even an option. He’s not able to respect you or himself.

Get away fast. Last time I had someone do that sort of thing it only got worse not better. Every time I thought they were changing, as soon as they saw my heart turn towards them a little, they went right back to their old self.

Police sounds good. You have all the evidence you need. It might take a drastic action that seems like is over the top to make a change in this situation. I would go for restraining order.

sweet-as-sour-milk wrote:
I have done the ‘trying to be friends with him’ thing. I’ve asked him to leave me alone, and told him that I would change my number if he tried to contact me again. He knows I don’t want to have anything to do with him. I’m actually pretty emotionally switched off to him now, I’ve lost all respect I had for him and I find him pathetic and annoying. I just have no idea how to make it stop, I’ve tried everything I can think of.

You’ve done everything you can, you’ve given him chances to be mature and adult about this, you’ve even tried to stand your ground but this man still hasn’t listened so call the police it’s out of your hands there’s nothing more you can do, this is harrassment don’t let him ruin your life.

Did you call the police and get a restraining order?

I think Trent was more wanting to offer an option and if it didn’t work then to call the police. I know I was definitely saying go for the over the top solution and get a restraining order fast like.

There’s nothing about what you said that sounds like it would be good to think twice.

sweet-as-sour-milk wrote:
I have done the ‘trying to be friends with him’ thing. I’ve asked him to leave me alone, and told him that I would change my number if he tried to contact me again. He knows I don’t want to have anything to do with him. I’m actually pretty emotionally switched off to him now, I’ve lost all respect I had for him and I find him pathetic and annoying. I just have no idea how to make it stop, I’ve tried everything I can think of.

lol we were writing at the same time… ha ha

trentlover20 wrote:

sweet-as-sour-milk wrote:
I have done the ‘trying to be friends with him’ thing. I’ve asked him to leave me alone, and told him that I would change my number if he tried to contact me again. He knows I don’t want to have anything to do with him. I’m actually pretty emotionally switched off to him now, I’ve lost all respect I had for him and I find him pathetic and annoying. I just have no idea how to make it stop, I’ve tried everything I can think of.

You’ve done everything you can, you’ve given him chances to be mature and adult about this, you’ve even tried to stand your ground but this man still hasn’t listened so call the police it’s out of your hands there’s nothing more you can do, this is harrassment don’t let him ruin your life.

sweet-as-sour-milk wrote:
I hadn’t gone and gotten a restraining order, because I feel like going to the police is a totally extreme option. But this is becoming a totally extreme situation. But he also doesn’t really contact me anymore or see me that much (we work together so we cross paths now and then) so I’m not sure what I could go to them with.

Call the police now before this spirals out of control. Look I’ve been harrassed and I can tell you that you will think he’s left you alone and that’s that but he could come back and start it up again at anytime. When it happened to me last year I had 1 maybe 2 months where things were fine and I didn’t hear anything from them and I thought I could finally start getting on with my life but then a month or 2 down the line they started harrassing me again, it got so bad I lost my friends, my self confidence, my social life, my trust, I became so depressed I was hugely out of control arguing with my family all the time getting drunk on weekends and wandering around on my own, it was only when me and my sister decided to call the police and tell them about the harrassment situation and we threatened them with the police that things finally stopped. And touch wood not heard a peep from them since August last year. **** your ex you have to do what’s right for you, I’m sure you do feel guilt on your part but do you think my ex feels guilty for breaking up with me? No and do I hold that against him? Am I giving him abuse? No because he finished with me the same way you finished with your ex in a mature and sensible way he sounds like he needs to man the **** up and get on with it we all get our hearts broken at some point it’s called real life, in real life you get into relationships with people and if they’re not going anywhere either the boyfriend or the girlfriend has to break it off.

I would run away from him as far and as fast as possible. Have you considered filing harassment charges?

sweet-as-sour-milk wrote:
I’m starting to consider it.

Not to be an extremist…but it doesn’t sound like a half bad idea. Why wait until he does something drastic?